Futhi, ekugcineni, kwenzeka, uneminyaka engu-30 ubudala futhi uqala ukushada. Yamukela ukubonga kwethu, kodwa khumbula ukuthi umshado emva kweminyaka engama-30 ngumcimbi obalulekile, futhi unenkinga yawo. Sizokhuluma ngazo zonke izinzuzo nezingozi zomshado emva kweminyaka engama-30.
Izinkinga emva kweminyaka engu-30
Umjikelezo wokukhulumisana neminyaka uyancipha, futhi uma ungahambisani nokuphila ngendlela efanele, khona-ke imvelo yakho yizintombi ezimbalwa, ezingashadile, noma labo abahlala ezikoleni kanye nosebenza nabo emsebenzini. Khona-ke ukufuna ukhetho kumadoda kuba nzima kakhulu. Ukukhathazeka kwezihlobo kuholela ekutheni owesifazane ubheka umuntu ngamunye ngamehlo avuthayo, ukuziphatha kwakhe kubonisa isifiso esinamandla sokushada. Futhi konke lokhu kuyinkimbinkimbi yokusesha.
Kodwa uma ubhekene namaphuzu amabili: unompilo ocebile, awunaso ukuhluleka kwama-knights, izihlobo azikuphi ukucindezela kuwe. Umshado wakho usuvele ukhona, kepha manje sekusekuqaleni ukuphumula, ngaphambi kobunzima bokuphila komndeni.
Nina bobabili ubuntu obusungulwe ngendlela yakho yokuphila emisiwe, nemikhuba yenu. Ungaphila ndawonye? Ngemuva kwakho konke, ngamunye wenu ingxenye yesigamu sokuphila isetshenziselwe ukuhlala wena nenye, futhi manje usubili. Ungakwazi yini ukubekezelela izinkinga zansuku zonke nokuhluleka komunye nomunye? Ingabe uzobe nesineke ukuvala amehlo akho kuzo zonke izinto ezincane futhi ubekezelele?
Enye ingozi yomshado emva kweminyaka engama-30 yilehluko yobudala phakathi kwabantu abashadile bakho nabazali bakho. Ngakho-ke, inkinga yezingane kanye nobaba bayoba ukukhula.
Njenganoma imuphi umshado, umshado wakho emva kweminyaka engama-30, usho ukuthi uzoba nengane ephuzile. Futhi uma usafuna ingane eyodwa? Emva kwakho konke, uma uneminyaka yobudala, amathuba okuba nengane enempilo, ikakhulukazi yesibili, anciphisa. Kuzodingeka uhlele ikhefu lesibini lokubeletha, ngokushesha ngemuva kokuqala.
Amapulani omshado emva kweminyaka engama-30
Uma ungathinti ukubaluleka okubaluleke kakhulu kumaminithi omshado osekupheleni, khona-ke lokhu okulandelayo kuhlanganisiwe. Emshadweni, abantu abaneminyaka ephakathi nendawo bangena ngokucophelela. Futhi lapha emishadweni enjalo kakade ayinayo imizwa, kodwa ukucabanga okucabangelayo, usuvele wazi ukuthi kungani bakhetha le ndoda kubayeni nokuthi yini okufanele bayilindele emshadweni.
Uma uvale amehlo akho ezinkingeni ezincane zomunye nomunye, hamba ukuyekethisa, ngakho-ke awusabi kakhulu izinkinga ekuphileni komndeni. Ungavumelana omunye nomunye. Uyeka ukuphikisana phezu kwezintambo, ukwesaba futhi uzophatha omunye ngenhlonipho. Ngenxa yalezi zizathu, ngokusho kwezibalo, imishado ngemva kweminyaka engama-30 ingenakwenzeka ukuba ihlukane.
Umuntu wanamuhla uneminyaka yobudala, esevele ekhona: isimo emphakathini, umsebenzi, indawo yokuphila, imoto. Awudingi ukuphazanyiswa ukuze ufinyelele imigomo ethile, ngoba kakade unakho konke lokhu. Manje usungakwazi ukuthola ingane engeke idinge lutho, ungene ezweni lomndeni, uphumule emncintiswaneni wangunaphakade wokuphumelela. Futhi noma ngabe konke kuhamba ngendlela engafanele njengoba ufuna, akudingeki uqale kusukela ekuqaleni uma uhlukanisa izindlela, unomsebenzi kanye nendawo yokuhlala.
Ungathula umyeni wakho. Bobabili, njengoba bekusho, bahamba, basinda emoyeni, bebona okuningi ekuphileni, futhi manje bobabili balungele impilo yomndeni. Ngeke abe engozini ngenxa yenveli edlula eceleni kwesimo sakhe.
Emshadweni owedlule kubantu abakuphila ngokocansi, futhi, konke kuhamba kahle. Mhlawumbe, unesifiso namandla, isipiliyoni ukuze uthole nje injabulo ngokwayo, kodwa futhi ukwanelise umlingani wakho. Lokhu kanye nokushada komshado okwedlule kunengxabano, ama-altruists kanye "nabadwebi" abahlangatshezi ngaso sonke isikhathi.
Kodwa ngokuvamile, umshado ngemva kweminyaka engu-30 usuvele ukhangele ngokwanele: uzuze isikhundla esithile emphakathini, ushadile ngempumelelo, futhi unomntwana.
Izinkinga zokushada komshado
1. Uma kungekho muntu oshade naye ngaphambi kweminyaka engama-30, kukhona okungahambi kahle nawe. Futhi uma umuntu ozoshada naye, kuye iminyaka engama-30 futhi engakashadi, khona-ke kudingeka udinga inkohliso engcolile (noma indodana yendodana, noma izingane ezingekho emthethweni, noma ohlukanisile). Lungiselela ukunikeza abantu ukukhuza: awuzange ushade, ngoba wawuzilungiselela ikusasa eliphumelelayo. Futhi akazange ashade, ngoba wayelindele wena, ngoba usondelene kakhulu.
2. Uma uneminyaka yobudala, kunethuba eliphansi lokushada
Kodwa awucabangi kanjalo. Ungumuntu othakazelisayo, ofundwa kahle, ohlakaniphile, ohola ukuphila okucebile, ukuhlangana nabantu abahlukene, okukhangayo futhi ungayeki ukuzibuka nokubukeka kwakho. Futhi njengoba unabo abalandeli, khona-ke uzokhetha omunye wabo uma ubona kufanelekile.
3. Uma uneminyaka yobudala, kunzima ukubeletha ingane enempilo
Mhlawumbe, umama wakho usho ngokuphindaphindiwe lokhu, ngoba unesineke kakhulu ekubeni ngugogo. Zama ukumqinisekisa ukuthi uma uneminyaka engama-40 uzoba nesikhathi sokukhuthazela ingane enempilo, ngoba uphilile ngokwakho, futhi imithi yanamuhla ayimi.
Sizame ukutshela ukuthi umshado uyisenzakalo esibalulekile ekupheleni kwawo wonke owesifazane, futhi isilinganiso saminyaka yobudala bomshado manje sino-30 nje kuphela. Ingabe lokhu kukutshela okuthile?