Ngokufika kwezingane, inani labantu abayingqayizivele endaweni efanayo liyakhula, futhi liba nesithakazelo nakakhulu.
Ithuba lokusondelana nomuntu othandekayo, ukukhulisa izingane njalo injabulo. Kodwa phakathi kwe-idyll, ukuphikisana kuvela ngokungazelelwe, ukungaboni kahle kwemibono. Ngezinye izikhathi i-spark engahle ivele ibe yintangabi. Futhi noma ngabe umlilo ungaqedwa, kukhona okushisayo kuwo. Injabulo ifinyelelwe uma kungenjalo ngothuli, bese kuba ngumlotha. Umphumela wokugcina unqotshwa imindeni kanye nemigomo.
Indlela yokuthola indlela yokuphuma kulesi simo? Umndeni ngamunye, umuntu ngamunye unquma ngendlela yakhe. Abaningi bethu babelane ngokuhlangenwe nakho kwabo nomndeni noma abangani. Futhi-ke nabantu abangabazi. Omunye ufuna isihawu, omunye ulindele iseluleko. Kodwa ingabe iseluleko esingavumelekile singasiza ubudlelwane? Mhlawumbe umsizi ongcono uzoba isazi sezengqondo?
Ngeshwa, empilweni yethu akusekho ukuthembela kwabangokwengqondo. Abantu abaningi bayamdidanisa nomhlengikazi, becabanga ukuthi abantu abagulayo kuphela abaphendukela kulo mchwepheshe. Abaningi, ikakhulukazi amadoda, bacabange ukuhambela ukubonisana njengobonakaliso obuthakathaka. Enye ingxenye ikholelwa ukuthi lokhu kuyisimali semali kanye nelungelo labantu abacebile. Noma kunjalo, konke lokhu kungukukhohlisa.
Ake sizame ukuthola ukuthi ngubani ongumqondo wezengqondo, futhi yiziphi izimo okufanele aphathwe ngazo?
Ngokuvamile, isazi sezengqondo ngudokotela ongapheli. Akayinikezi imithi, akanikezi imiyalelo. Isazi sengqondo somndeni asinalo i-tube yeglue esandleni sokuqinisa iseli lakho lomphakathi. Abekho abantu abafanayo, azikho izimo ezifanayo. Ngakho, asikho iseluleko esifanele. Ngabe isazi sengqondo somndeni singasiza kanjani ubudlelwano?
Empeleni, wonke umuntu enhliziyweni uyazi impendulo kuyo yonke imibuzo yabo. Kodwa ikhanda ligcwele izinkinga nemicabango eminingi, imizwelo igcwele, ukoma kwamandla kuyabonakala, futhi umqondo wokubaluleka komuntu siqu uphakamisa. Futhi asisayizwa i-interlocutor, ngisho noma engumuntu othandekayo kithi. Ungakuzwa kuphi izwi lakho langaphakathi?
Kubonakala kuwe ukuthi uzame konke, kodwa kuhamba kakhulu? Ingabe bobabili bakhuluma ngolunye ulimi phakathi nosuku nobusuku? Ingabe yena (noma wena) uphishekelwa isifo somzimba (noma ulungile?!) Umhawu? Ingabe abazali bakho bavele bakuxhase? Izingane zihlezi emakhanda abo zalwa nazo? Abahlala njalo emkhayeni wakho bomndeni babezihlambalaza futhi behlukunyezwa? Nasi sekuyisikhathi sokubuyela ochwepheshe!
I-psychologist yomndeni osebenza kahle izokusiza ukuthi uziqonde wena nemibono yakho. Kuzokusiza ukuba ubuke imigomo nezifiso zakho, endaweni yomlingani, esimweni sonke. Mhlawumbe ngosizo lesazi sengqondo uzobuka ubuntwana bakho. Ngokuvamile izimpande zezinkinga zabantu abadala zikhona. Imibuzo kadokotela kuphela inikeza izinkomba, vula isiqondiso "sokusesha". Futhi uthola izimpendulo ngokwakho. Ngamunye wethu unomthombo wangaphakathi ovumela ukuthi sikwazi ukubhekana nanoma yisiphi isimo sokuphila. Umsebenzi we-psychologist ukukusiza ukuthola le nsiza, akeke bayisebenzise.
Kungcono kuwe ukuthi isazi sengqondo somndeni singasiza ubudlelwane. Ungalindeli iseluleko esithile. Umthwalo wempilo yakho uzohlala ezandleni zakho. Ukubonisana kwengqondo kwengqondo ngeke kushintshe abathandekayo bakho nezwe elikuzungezile, ngeke banikeze ukuphulukiswa okusheshayo. Ukwakha ubudlelwano emndenini akuyona umsebenzi olula, umsebenzi wansuku zonke. Kodwa, mhlawumbe, uyozizwa unjengezinyane, ngokuzumayo wabona i-saucer ngobisi phambi kwakhe.