Ngempela, cishe isigamu sabantu abadala baseYurophu singashadile futhi bayajabula. Abantu abangaphezu kuka-30% baseYurophu abafuni ukuhlala nendoda endlini evamile. Banelisekile ngendima yenkosikazi. Omunye futhi ujabule! Ngakho-ke, ingabe lesi siqubulo sowesifazane wesimanje noma kungumqondo wokuphila kwethu? Ngakho kungani abaningi bekhetha ukuzodwa? Owesifazane wenziwa ebhizinisini, unamandla futhi ufuna ubudlelwane obulinganayo (obambisene naye), esaba ukuba ngaphansi. Ukwesaba izingxabano, ukukhwabanisa nokukhwabanisa. Uyesaba ukuzilahleka njengomuntu, abe ngumgcini wendlu, elahlekelwa ukukhangwa kwakhe ngemuva kokubeletha. Abesifazane banomuzwa wokuthi ukuphila kuzophela ngemva komshado.
Ake sizame ukuqonda ukuthi yiziphi izizathu ezenza impilo yokuphila yedwa yabesifazane banamuhla.
- Mhlawumbe lokhu, njengazo zonke izinto ezimweni zethu kanye nemibono yokuphila, kuvela ebuntwaneni. Ukuphila komndeni kufana nabesifazane besimanje abaneminyaka engamashumi amathathu ubudala. Babheka phambi kobuzima babomama esikhathini sobuSoviet. Ukuphila okungenakunyakaziswa, sebenzisa kusukela ekuseni kuze kube sebusuku, ugijime ezitolo, lapho kubalwa khona izibalo ezingenalutho, ikhishi, ukuhlola izincwadi zokuzivocavoca kanye namaholidi ehlobo nge-trowel ezweni. Ngakho-ke, abesifazane besimanje bafuna ukuphila okuhluke ngokuphelele. Zinamanye amanani - umsebenzi, amaqembu, ubulili, impilo, i-pool, njll.
- Ngeminyaka engamashumi amathathu, owesifazane oye waphumelela isikhundla futhi uvame ukuthola imali engaphezu kwalokho. Unesimiso sokuphila esinqunyiwe, ukudla nokugcina okuqinile endlini. Futhi owesifazane onjalo ucabanga ngokuhlakanipha ukuthi akuzona eziningi amadoda azosinda kulokhu. Thola emadolobheni omuntu oyokwabelana nawe ngendlela yakho yokuphila kunzima. Kodwa ake sibheke kancane ngakolunye uhlangothi. Okokuqala, impilo yanamuhla ihluke kakhulu kulokho omama bethu babe nakho. Thenga ukudla akuyona inkinga nganoma isiphi isikhathi sosuku, imali enkulu yempahla yasendlini, eyenza ngokugcwele imisebenzi yabesifazane ababili nabapheki. Ngaphezu kwalokho, izindlu zasendlini zilawulwa kahle futhi amadoda ngokwawo. Ngakho-ke, lapho ubunzima bokuphila buphelile, kuyoba lula ukuthola umuntu ozokwabelana nawe impilo yakho. Ngakho bheka ngokucophelela nxazonke, futhi uzothola umuntu ozokujabulela ukuphishekela umsebenzi wakho.
- Esinye isizathu, esaboniswa ngabesifazane abangashadile, ukubhujiswa kwesigamu sesilisa somphakathi wanamuhla ngezocansi. Abathandi, kodwa benze uthando ebusuku. Futhi thina besifazane ngakho sifuna uthando, ukuthandana okuhle, ukuhlola imizwa. Kodwa, maye, amadoda ayeka ukunqoba abesifazane. Yebo, kodwa nje kudingeka uqonde ukuthi awukwazi ukudlala ebuhlotsheni, kodwa kufanele ube nguwe. Bonke abesifazane bahlukile futhi ngamunye unomlingiswa wakhe futhi ngamunye ukhona lowo muntu oyoba ummangali wakho. Kuyaziwa ukuthi amadoda angu-50% akhetha owesifazane kumuntu, hhayi isigqila.
- Khumbula amagama avela kulelo culo "Kunzima kumantombazane avela emphakathini ophezulu ukugwema ukuba yedwa" Kungani? Le ntombazane yaqeda izidakamizwa zegolide kusukela esikoleni futhi eneminyaka engamashumi amabili nesishiyagalolunye ubudala inezinombolo zamayunivesithi ahloniphekile, iyazi izilimi ezinhlanu futhi isebenza ebhange elikhulu, futhi efanayo yathola indlu emadolobheni aseMoscow. Intombazane enjalo ngempelasonto isebenza eYurophu futhi ingashadile ngesikhathi esisodwa. Uhlobo oluvulekele ebuhlotsheni, kepha into ayihambisani nezikhulu. Uzizwa sengathi uyinkosikazi nabesilisa bayibona, kodwa akuwona wonke umuntu ongakwazi ukukhokhela okunjalo okunethezeka. Kodwa emva kwakho konke, uthando aluyithengi ukudayiswa kwemfanelo yakho, kodwa umuntu othanda ngempela, uyathanda kuphela. Futhi uqala ukwesaba futhi ubheke isizathu esithile. Futhi uphinde ugijime ukuze usebenze. Imisebenzi ibaluleke kakhulu, kodwa awukwazi ukugijima kuze kube phakade emizweni yakho bese uhlehlisa ubuhlobo kamuva.
- Amantombazane amaningi asaba ukuzihlanganisa nobungane obuseduze nomlingani. Bamane nje besaba ukushiywa, bethengisiwe. Bayesaba ukulahlekelwa ukuzimela kwabo. Ngokuziphatha kwabo babonisa ukuthi bangabani nanoma ubani, ukuthi bakhululekile futhi bazimele. Ngakho-ke, kukhona izingxabano, ukukhwabanisa nokuhlukana kobudlelwane. Yisiphi isizathu? Mhlawumbe umndeni lapho le ntombazane yayakhula khona, yasinda ekuhlukaneni kwabazali bakhe noma yena wabhekana nothando olungaphumeleli ebusheni bakhe, ukukhashelwa nokudumazeka. Futhi yingakho ebuhlotsheni ezama ukunamandla ngaphandle kokuzizwa. Futhi ungesabi ukukhohliswa, kufanele nje uphile, noma yini eyenzeka kamuva, ukuzisola ngamathuba alahlekile.
- Abesifazane besimanje, bavikelekile futhi baphumelele empilweni. Abesaba kakhulu ukulahlekelwa ukuzimela kwabo. Abesifazane abanjalo bahlale bebona ibanga ebuhlotsheni nomuntu futhi baphoqeleka ukuthi bahlale bebonisa ukulingana ngokobulili. Yena ngokwakhe unkosikazi futhi esinye isimo asimukeli. Futhi, isizathu salokhu kuziphatha ebuntwaneni. Cishe kwakukhona abazali abafuna kakhulu, ikakhulukazi ubaba. Futhi esimweni somuntu omdala, ukuthola inkululeko, manje useyesaba ukumlahlekelwa. Wayengacatshangwa njengengane, kepha manje akabalanga nanoma ubani. Kulesi simo, kufanele sizibheke ngokucophelela, kuzomele sizame ukuqonda ukuthi inkinga enkulu ayikho kubantu abakuzungezile, kodwa kuwe.
Yebo, empilweni yanamuhla owesifazane ubonakala engadingi indoda. Ukuzimela kwezezimali kuzivumela futhi kugqoke, futhi kujabulise. Uma ufuna ubulili, thola umthandi, ungakwazi ngisho nokubeletha ngokusabalalisa okufakelwayo. Ngakho udinga indoda? Kuwe. Kodwa kufanele sikhumbule ukuthi wonke owesifazane, noma yini ayishoyo, udinga umndeni. Ngakho ungayeki futhi konke kuzovela! Futhi akeke bathi kunzima kumantombazane avela emphakathini ophezulu ukugwema ukuba yedwa!