Futhi odokotela bayazi lokhu kangcono kunanoma yimuphi omunye umuntu. Wonke umuntu uyazi indima enkulu yegama ebuhlotsheni phakathi kwabantu, kodwa akubona wonke umuntu oqonda ukuthi umuntu angasebenzisa kanjani amandla enkulumo yakhe futhi nini. Ake sibheke ezinye izibonelo, lapho igama linencazelo ekhethekile empilweni yethu.
Amaphuzu okungaqondakali aphikisanayo: inkulumo yokuhlunga
Yonke imindeni ixabana, njengoba izazi zengqondo zisho. Imindeni ejabulayo kuphela ixabana ngokuzikhandla, futhi ayijabuli - ngokulimaza. Umehluko omkhulu phakathi kokungqubuzana okwembula nokuxazulula inkinga, futhi impikiswano ekhuphula ukuhlukana kobudlelwane, inamandla okungafinyeleli amaphuzu okungafinyeleli.
Amaphuzu okungaqondakali empini - lawa yimishwana noma amagama akwazi ukubeka iphuzu elimnandi ebuhlotsheni. Esinye sezibonelo ezithinta kakhulu umyalezo wokuhlubuka. Uma abashadile noma abathandi bephikisana, futhi ku-fuse, omunye wabo uthi ushintshile, kungonakalisa ubuhlobo obunzima.
Iphuzu lokungaqondakali akudingeki njalo yedwa, ngezinye izikhathi kungaba yi-ellipsis. Isibonelo, kukholwa ukuthi emndenini ophikisanayo, iphuzu lokungapheli noma yiliphi ibinzana elidalula udumo lwabazali bomlingane. Kodwa ngokungafani nezindaba zokungathengi, kudingeka ushayele abazali bakho abazali izikhathi eziningana ngamagama angcolile noma ubaphikisa okuthile okubalulekile ngaphambi kokuba kwenziwe isinqumo mayelana nekhefu.
Amaphuzu okungaqondakali emindenini ehlukene ingahluka. Enye indaba mayelana nokuhlukunyezwa ayinakubekezelelwa, ezinye zivamile. Abanye abathetheleli ukuhlukumeza nabazali babo, abanye bayakwazi ukuhlala empini enjalo iminyaka. Ngakho-ke kuvame ukuthatha isikhathi ukuqonda ukuthi yikuphi iphuzu lokungalingani komlingani wakho.
Ungalokothi uthi "ungalokothi"
Enye imfihlo yokuphikisana okuphumelelayo, ukuvuselela ubudlelwane, ikhono lokungahlali. Amazwi afomu: "konke", "njalo", "kuze kube phakade", "akakho", "ngaphandle", "akufanele", akumele "," ngaphandle ", kungabandakanywa kusuka ku-silulumagama wakho uma ufuna ukugcina ubuhlobo. Ngokuphathelene nezingane, lawa magama aphulwa ngokuphelele. Ukutshela ingane into enjengokuthi: "Uhlale uphuzile" noma "Awuze ufunde ukukhuluma isiNgisi ngokuvamile" - uyayilungisa ngokuhluleka. Ingane ayinaso ukuzethemba okuzinzile futhi ayikwazi ukuzihlola ngokwanele. Akazi ukuthi umama wakhe ukhathele yini futhi uyathukuthele, noma impela akafundile futhi u-mediocrity, ukuze yonke into ibonakale ngokubheka ubuso. Indima yezwi ekukhulisweni kwengane inkulu kakhulu, futhi umuntu akufanele asebenzise kabi igunya lakhe labazali kule ndaba.
Ungaqhathanisi umuntu nomuntu ngaphandle kwakhe
Indlela eyakhayo yokuveza ukunganeliseki komuntu ukugwema ukukhiqiza nokuqhathanisa. Isebenza ebuhlotsheni phakathi kwabantu kunoma yisiphi isimo: ekhaya, emsebenzini, kanye nabangane, kanye nezingane, kanye nabathandekayo.
Uma umuntu oyedwa eveza izimbali, omunye ebonisa uthando ngokukhathalela impilo yowesifazane noma ngemisebenzi yasendlini, ungawaqhathanisi. Lokhu akukubi futhi akusihle ngokwayo, umbala omubi noma omuhle walo mkhuba esizihlanganisa nawo. Ungathanda ukunikezwa izimbali? Ukuthwala indoda yezomnotho ngenhla yezitolo, okuzoqukatha into ethi "izimbali zowesifazane othandekayo." Noma vele uqhathanise nawe: "Uma unginika izimbali, ube yimi indoda ethandekayo kakhulu emhlabeni." Ungamfundisi impilo futhi utshele izindaba ngesitayela esithi "Kodwa uMan'kin Vasya akalokothi akhohlwe ukunikeza izimbali zakhe."
Indlela yokuveza ukunganeliseki futhi ungacasuli
Amakhosi emkhakheni wezincwadi esikhathini sethu yi-apologists ye-NLP. Uhlelo lwe-Neuro-linguisti lukuvumela ukuba ufunde ngokuningiliziwe indima yegama ebuhlotsheni phakathi kwabantu. Kungani abantu abaqedile izifundo ze-NLP baphumelela ekuthengiseni? Ngenxa yokuthi baqeqeshwe ikhono lokudlulisa izindawo ezinenkinga ekukhulumisaneni, qalisa othintana naye, ngokushesha uthole amaphuzu avamile wokuxhumana nomxhumanisi.
Ngakho-ke, ku-NLP kunezindlela eziningi ezithakazelisayo zokufeza ngobumnene umnikazi wakho. Isibonelo, uma ufuna ukwenza umuntu aguquke, kodwa akafuni ukuba umeluleki nomuntu ofundisa abantu engqondweni, udinga inkulumo ehlanjululwayo.
Inkulumo ehlanjululwayo, ngokungafani namagama akhulunywa "ebunzini," yenza umuntu aqonde inkinga ngokwakhe futhi afune izixazululo. Ngezinye izikhathi ngesimo esibucayi kulula ukuthola umlayezo wakho ngaphesheya kokuqondile. Uma kunesidingo somyalelo wokungabi sekwephuzile, uzochitha ingxoxo nomsebenzi enkulumweni eqondisiwe, uzofeza okuningi. Inkulumo ehlanjululwayo iqukethe izifanekiselo eziningi, ukufanisa nezinye izindlela. Isibonelo saso kwabasebenzi abasheshe bezoba: "Ungabheka ngokungafani ukulibaziseka, omunye ubonakala njengesibonakaliso sokubambisana, abanye bazobona ukulibaziseka njengesibonakaliso sobuvila nokungaqondisi kahle. Ngizojabula uma wena, uLarisa Mikhailovna, ethola ithuba lokuzimela ngasese noma esidlangalaleni, uxoxe kafushane noma ngokugcwele ngenkinga ngezinye izikhathi ezivelayo zalolu hlobo. "
Inkohliso yenkulumo ehlanjululwayo ingaba ukuthi awunikezi i-interlocutor yakho ukukhetha - ukuxoxa noma ukuxoxa ngesihloko esingathandeki. Uyamnika ukukhetha kwamafomu nezindlela zokuxoxisana, okwenza inkhulumomphendvulwano, futhi hhayi ukumphoqa ukuba akwenze.
Ukusetshenziselwa okusetshenziswe ngokugqamile kwezincwadi ekukhulumisaneni
Kukhona imisebenzi emincane kakhulu ebuhlotsheni, okungasombulula ngosizo lwegama. Cabangela kafushane isibonelo sowesifazane kanye nendoda.
Owesifazane ogama lakhe lilahliwe futhi alikwazi ukuthola umsebenzi kufanele akhohlwe kuze kube phakade nanoma yikuphi amagama okugxeka. Amagama asekela, ukuvunywa nokholo kulabo abathembekile, lapho kungekho khona imizamo yokumsiza empeleni, kuzoletha imiphumela esheshayo. Yebo, ukuba umsakazo akulula kakhulu. Kodwa amazwi amnandi amnandi esimweni sokungasebenzi komuntu angasebenzisa izimangaliso.
Amadoda kufanele akhumbule ukuthi uma owesifazane ecela isipho esibizayo - isambatho sombobo, imoto noma umhlobiso, futhi akanakho imali yalokho, angakwazi ... ukuxoxa ngakho. Lokhu akuyona ihlaya, kuyiqiniso: izinkulumo ezinhle kanye nezingxoxo ezinde ngokukhanyisa amakhandlela noma ngenyanga ziyakwazi isikhathi esithile noma ngisho nesikhathi eside ukuchitha owesifazane wesifiso se-mercantile. Into esemqoka ukukholelwa kuwe, futhi ufunde ukuqonda inkulumo yakho.