"Yeka indlela engiyithukuthele ngayo!" - lesi simemo esivela engozini ye-cartoon ethi "The Blue Puppy" akuchazi nje imizwa yeqhawe lika-pirate, kodwa ngezinye izikhathi ingane yakho, futhi ngokushesha noma umzali ngamunye uyibhekana nayo. Ukushaywa umntanakho nokudabuka kuchazwa yizimpawu ezibonakalayo zesigaba sokukhula, izidingo ezishintshayo zomntwana.
Iminyaka emithathu kuya kweyisithupha
Eminyakeni emithathu insimu yokukhulumisana yengane iyanda. Uya enkulisa, uhambele amaqembu okuthuthukiswa ngenkuthalo, unezingane ezijwayele kakhulu. Ngakho-ke, ngokuthokoza okusha nokutholwa, izingxabano ezintsha zivela ngokungenakuphika. Ingane ibhekene neqiniso lokuthi ubudlelwane bomuntu abukwazi ukuhlala bungafihli ngaso sonke isikhathi, izingxabano zenzeka njalo, futhi kufanele ahlangabezane nemizwelo engathandeki. Futhi uma unyaka nonyaka noma emibili kwakwanele ukuzwelana nomuntu okhungathekile, ongazange ahlanganyele ihlombe lakhe nebhakede, bese uyishintsha. ukunakwa, bese uneminyaka eyi-3 ingane isivele ikhulume kahle futhi iqondakala ngokwanele ukuze ingene ekuxoxweni.
I-kindergarten iyithuba lapho izingane zithola ithuba elibalulekile lokuzwa imizwa kanye nobuhlobo njengokuphila komuntu omdala: uthando nokuhlukanisa, ubungane nokukhungatheka, injabulo nomhawu. Futhi-ke kubalulekile ukuthi umzali akwenze njengechweba elithembekile, lapho umkhumbi wezinto ezenzeka ezinganeni zikwazi ukuphephela. Uma ingane izwa ukuthi ukuhlupheka kwakhe kuyaqondakala, khona-ke bayamlimaza kakhulu. Kulokhu, umama angaqala ingxoxo kanje: "Ngiyabona ukuthi uqale ukukhala kaningi, awufuni ukuya enkulisa, kwenzekani?" Uma ingane ingaphenduli, kubalulekile ukukhuluma izinguqulo eziningana, ngoba ngezinye izikhathi abantu abadala bangase baphenduke ngokucabanga kwabo: "Ingabe uthisha wakutshele noma yini futhi uphelelwe amandla? Uthole into engayithandi enkulisa? Noma kukhona okungalungile kwabanye abafana - Ingabe uxabana nomuntu? Mhlawumbe othile wayeke ukudlala nawe? " Ngokujwayelekile ingane iphendula komunye wembuzo noma iveza inguqulo yakhe. Lokhu kungukuqala kwengxoxo lapho umzali ekhuluma khona futhi ebiza imizwa yengane: "Ngempela, kuhlambalaza kakhulu uma intombi iqala ukuxhumana nabanye futhi iyeka ukuxhumana nawe. Kodwa kwenzeke - wonke umuntu unelungelo lokukhetha ukuthi ubani ozoxhumana naye. Ucabanga ukuthi ungathanda ukuba umngane lala mabantombazane, noma ingabe kukhona omunye ebhentshini ongathanda ukudlala naye? Mhlawumbe uzozibuza ukudlala ndawonye? " Kule nkhulumomphendvulwano, umzali akabi nje ukuzwa imizwa yengane, kodwa futhi kumsiza ukuba aphile ukungapheleli kobudlelwane bangempela, abonise izindlela ezihlukile ezivela kulesi simo.
Ukuxoxa ngokukhululekile ngezimo ezinzima nezingane, sibonisa ukuthi lokhu kungakhulunywa futhi kufanele kukhulunywe ngakho. Futhi lapho bekhulile bawususa isifiso sokungazikhipheli ekubambeni ngokuthula, kodwa ukuxazulula enkulumweni. Ngaphezu kwalokho, eqonda imizwa yabo, ingane iqala ukuqonda ngokucacile nakwabanye abantu, ifunda ukuwashiya ilungelo lokuba yibo. Lokhu kuqonda okwenzekayo kuqinisa ukuzethemba kwakhe.
Yini okufanele singayenzi ngalokhu?
Isihloko sendlela umuntu angakwazi ukubhekana ngayo nokukhala izinyembezi kanye nokushaywa isikhathi esisodwa naso sonke sinezinombolo eziningi zezinkondlo ezedlule kusukela emlonyeni kuya emlonyeni futhi zixoxwa emasimini omzali. Nokho, ezinye zalezi zindlela zokufundisa ziyakwazi ukulimaza ubuhlobo bomzali wengane.
Iphatha shalat
Enye yezindlela abavame ukuzinikezwa kubazali ukutshela ingane ukuthi ayinacala, kodwa "izimpungushe zakhe zihlaselwa", okwenza okuthile okuvinjelwe, noma "omunye umfana / intombazane / umdwebo we-cartoon" - omunye umuntu wagxila umntwana ekungalalelweni kanye nokushaya.
"Ake sixoxe nabo ngokuqondile, ukuze bangabe besenza lokhu futhi ngeke sixabane nawe," ingane ihlinzekwa. Kubonakala sengathi le ndlela inomgomo omuhle kakhulu - ukuvumela ingane ukuba izwe ukuthi ayimthandi ngokungemthetho, futhi ilahla kuphela ukuziphatha kwakhe. Futhi noma yini eyenzekayo, ingcono kakhulu emhlabeni. Ngokwengxenye, lokhu kuncike kumasiko wendabuko, ngezinkolelo zawo ukuthi "amandla amnyama" atshalwa umuntu omuhle. Iyini ingozi yalendlela? Uma imilenze neziphatha ziphila impilo ehlukile noma konke kungenza uCarson aqonde, kuvela ukuthi ingane ayiyona eyinhloko yomzimba wakhe noma izenzo zakhe. Ukushintshwa komthwalo wemfanelo kungaba yindawo elula, ngaphezu kwalokho, incazelo enjalo ayisifundisi ukuqonda ukuthi kwenzekani. Kubalulekile ukuthi ungamangaleli umuntu ongaphandle, kodwa ucabange okuthile okwakhayo, ngesikhathi esifanayo echaza ingane imizwa yakhe nezifiso zakhe: "Ingabe uthanda ukudlala ngezandla zakho ngendlala? Yebo, kumnandi, kodwa uma udla, awukwenzi. , futhi emva kokudla kwasekuseni sizodlala naye ngokwehlukana. "
Angiboni lutho, angizwa lutho
Abazali abaningi bakholelwa ngobuqotho ukuthi ukungazinaki ngokuphelele kwezinyembezi kwenza ingane ingene. Ngomncanyana, bayeka ngokubonisa ukukhuluma noma bathunyelwa ukuhlala bodwa ekamelweni. Ngaphezu kwalokho, ngisho nokuhlupheka okudingekayo ukusebenzisa izindlela ezinzima zokufundisa, abaningi bethu bakholelwa ngokujulile ukuthi basiza ingane yabo. "Konke, angizange ngiyeke," umzali uyazikhuthaza ngalesi sikhathi. Izimpande zalokhu kuziphatha yilokho kubonakala kunzima kithi: ingane idlala ngokukhethekile "yeshashalazi yomdlali oyedwa", ngakho-ke kubalulekile nje ukuthi imphule izilaleli. Futhi ukuphumula okungokomzwelo, lapho esikubeka kuyo, kuyobhubhisa "uhlelo olukhohlisayo". Eqinisweni, i-kid ithola ukuthi ayikwazi ukubhekana ngokuzimela nemizwelo yakhe. Futhi kulokhu mzuzu onzima, umuntu osondelene naye uqala ngokungazelelwe amnaki, futhi ingane izophinde ihlangane nomzwelo wokulondeka okukhulu. Ukujeziswa ngokuthula bekube yindlela ethandwayo yababelethi - ngemuva kokuba ingane isheshe ivumelane nazo zonke izinqatshelwe zethu. Umzwelo wokulahlwa unamandla anjalo okubhubhisa ukuthi aphoqa ingane ukuba ivumelane nganoma yisiphi isikhundla somuntu omdala, ukuze ubuyisele uxhumano oluphukile. Akenzi lokhu hhayi ngoba uqaphele konke futhi uthathe iziphetho, kodwa kuphela ngoba usongo lokuqeda ubuhlobo lunamandla kunesifiso sokuthola okuthile. Ekugcineni, "ukukhuliswa" okunjalo kubangela ukuthi ingane ivele ishintshe izimo zengqondo zaleso simo zamukele ngokuzithoba ukuthi umuntu akanakuthembela kumzali futhi kungcono ukungamethembi nhlobo. Esikhathini esizayo, ubungozi bokuthatha isibonelo esifanayo sokungathembisi kubantu abadala abakwenza ukwakha ubuhlobo obuseduze naye ekukhuleni. Ngakho-ke, ngokuhlukanisa ingane, esikhundleni sokuba sisondele kulo mzuzu onzima, sithuthukisa le nkinga kuphela.
Kakhulu kakhulu "cha"
Ngezinye izikhathi ukucasuka kanye nokwehluleka kwengane kuyindlela yokusabela ukuthi abantu abadala bayaphazamisa ingane yemvelo isifiso sokuhlola umhlaba, ukubeka imingcele eminingi enqabelayo. Kuyinto elula kakhulu futhi esheshayo ukondla ingane ngokwayo futhi uyishintshe ngaphambi kokuphuma. Ngendlela yokuhamba, sinamahloni, ukuze ahlale eseduze: "Uzowa kusukela kule ntaba", "Ungagijimi futhi ubuke ngaphansi kwezinyawo zakho," "Manje faka induku engcolile." Akumangazi ukuthi ukubekezela kwengane, onobuvelo obatshela ngokungesabi ukuqhubekela phambili nokuzama izinto ezintsha, ukuqhuma kanye nemifula ivela emagwini. Phela, umsebenzi wezingane ukuhlala abacwaningi, futhi umsebenzi wethu ukuwasiza endleleni, ngokugcwele ukuvikela "insimu yokuhlola." Isibonelo, uma ingane ifuna ukusiza ukugeza izitsha, mbonise ukuthi ungayenza kanjani kangcono kakhulu, ususe imimese ebukhali. Yiqiniso, ngisho noma umzali evumela okuthile, ingane ingase ibe namakhono namakhono ngenxa yobudala, isifiso "Mina ngokwami" sikhulu kakhulu. Le mpikiswano ibangela ukusabela okubi okubi. Akufanelekile ukusola ingane ecasulayo, kodwa ukumsekela, ukuphakamisa ukuthi uzame futhi ngosizo lwakho. Kodwa-ke, singabona okunye okwedlulele, lapho, sihamba endleleni yokunciphisa okungenani, kulula ukuxazulula yonke ingane. Ngokuvamile lokhu kuhlanganiswa nesifiso esihle sokungenzi inkululeko yakhe yangaphakathi nokukhuphula izinqumo zezinqumo zakhe. Ingane ngesikhathi esifanayo itholakala ezweni elikhohlisayo, elinomqondo wongamandla akhe kanye nokungabikho kwemingcele. Lesi sikhundla sabazali singaholela ekuphukeni okukhulu kokuthuthukiswa kwengane. Emva kwakho konke, ukuze uhlale ezweni langempela, umuntu kumele afunde ukuqonda ukuthi kukhona ukulinganiselwa okuthile kulo. Kubalulekile ukuthi izingane ziqaphele ngesikhathi lapho umhlaba ungaphelele, into engasebenzi kuwo, bese sithola ukukhathazeka futhi sikhala, futhi uma kuvela ukuthi siyajabula. Futhi lokhu kuvamile, ngoba lokhu kungukuphila.