Ngokusho kobuchwepheshe bokufeza impumelelo, ukuze ufeze into ethile, udinga ngokuningiliziwe ucabange ukuthi usuvele ufezekise iphutha lakho lesifazane - indoda yamaphupho.
Ngakho-ke, uyini, into enhlekazi - indoda yamaphupho? I-Slender, i-athletic, isitayela ...
Kusukela ohlangothini lombukeli
Sisho ukuthi into enhlekazi - indoda yamaphupho inhle, uma sizwa kuye ukukhanya ngaphakathi futhi sibone umuzwa okhethekile okhethekile kuyilapho lokhu kushukumisa isifiso sokusondela futhi sithande emisebeni yalesi sihle, ukujabulela. Ngenxa yalokho, ubuhle buyanelisa isidingo esithile somuntu, sigcwalisa ikhulu, sikwanelisa ezinye zezinkinga zakhe ezingokwengqondo. Umuntu ngamunye unobungane bakhe obuyinkimbinkimbi nomqondo othi "ubuhle". Yini ayifaka kulo mqondo - yena ngokwakhe akaqapheli ngokugcwele.
Kusukela ohlangothini lwezinto
Ngesikhathi sibheka into enhlekazi - indoda yamaphupho nobuhle kusuka kulowo obukayo. Futhi uma ubheka kulowo obangela umuzwa? Kubonakala sengathi umuntu ofanayo angazizwa enhle futhi enhle, kuye ngokuthi isimo somzwelo, izingubo, isimo sengqondo sabantu abalulekile kuye, njll. Indoda enhle, njengomthetho, ngumuntu owanelisiwe, enelisekile ngaye. Ukumbuka ufuna ukufana, ufuna ukutheleleka ngesimo sakhe, ufuna ukuhlala eduze nomthombo onjalo wokuzibheka okuhle. Ngemuva kwalokho, uma nginebuhle futhi lobu buhle nami, khona-ke ngizibandakanya kulo mcebo - ubuhle, ngokuyingxenye ukuba yingxenye yayo.
Ngakho ngangingadla!
Ngokuvamile, umqondo wokuhlanganisana nalokho okuhehayo, kuyiqiniso ngocansi. Kukhona umbono wokuthi labo bantu abafuna ukuboleka okuthile, okufana nokufana (ukuthanda sengathi "badla isibindi sesitha ukuze babe namandla") kubangelwa imizwa yobulili. Ngokombono we-psychoanalysis, izinqubo zocansi nokudla / ukumunca kunesisekelo esivamile sezingqondo.
Uphi inkinobho yami?
Mhlawumbe, uma sihlelwe ukuthi itafula elihle liyokwenza ukuba abantu bafune ukudla, futhi izifiso - Ubuhle obuningi abukwazi ukuthola umuntu ohahayo ngesizathu esilula - abawuthandi! Uma umyeni enhle ngaphandle, kodwa engazizwa umfazi wakhe, engamzwisisi naye, akazisoli ngaye, akaqondi izifiso zakhe, akalaleli izindaba ngokuphila kwakhe, ubheka umsebenzi wakhe njengento engenalutho futhi engaboni owesifazane kuye, ngeke kube khona owesifazane ovamile olwa ocansini ukukhanga kumuntu onjalo! Uma engeyena umbonisi.
Abaningi babona insindiso emasu ekusikhipha umzimba. Injabulo yomzimba ivela ekuvuseleleni okusha, kodwa emva kokuzihlaziya okunjalo kanye nokuthokozisa okuhlangenwe nakho, i-sediment engavamile ingahlala, ngoba umuntu uyinto eyinkimbinkimbi futhi ulwela ukufeza. Uma kungenaso isipiliyoni esisodwa esisodwa sothando kanye nesisa, ukuhlangenwe nakho kobulili okuqhakazile kuyoba yisiqephu. "Ukuthokoza ngokungahlelekile" kungenzeka kuphela uma zonke izicelo zinelisekile: ngokomzimba, ngokomzwelo futhi-yebo-yebo! - inani / ukuziphatha.
Ubulili = ubuhle?
Ukuvusa ngocansi kuyinto enzima kakhulu futhi engumuntu ngamunye ukuthi akunakwenzeka ukukhuluma nganoma yimiphi imikhuba. Abesifazane abaningi, isibonelo, bajabule uma lo mlingani efana noyise, hhayi i-superhero ekhoneni lomagazini. Iningi labesifazane ngeke lithande indoda engaphelele, kodwa umuntu ozwa ubuntu bakhe futhi akajabuli ngobuhle bomzimba wakhe, kodwa kusukela kuye njengobuntu obungenakuqhathaniswa, abakhethile. Uma inyunyana yabantu igcinwa "ngobuhle", khona-ke ihluleka kakhulu: abashadile bazobhujiswa e-alamu ephakade mayelana nokuthi "banganqatshwa", bathathe indawo enhle kakhulu.
Kusho ukuthini lokhu?
Ngifuna ukuba nomuntu ojabule ngami ngokwami, okwenzela injabulo kimi, ukungiphatha ngalesi simo. Isifiso samakhosikazi - indoda yamaphupho - i-narcissus elandelanayo, "ukuzihlambalaza wena," ukukhanya akugcini ukwaneliseka okunempilo kangcono njenge-narcissism ekhazimulayo.
Ukungasebenzi - lo muntu ngokwakhe uqondisa okweqile.
Kubalulekile ukuthi indoda yami ihlonishwe yimivelo yami, kangangokuthi engangondla kakhulu ngobuhle bayo, bangaki kulabo abahlolwayo isimo sami sincike.
Owesifazane angakwazi ukubona ukuthi yena naye akafani, nokuthi impumelelo yakhe ayifani nokuphumelela kwakhe.
Ukubuyisela kabusha umuntu ngenxa ye "imodeli yobuhle", usengozini yokuchitha ubuhlobo: makabe nomuzwa wokuthi ungamthandi futhi wena, ukuhlolwa kwabanye kubaluleke kakhulu. Izazi zengqondo zibiza lezi zithandani zithi: umphefumulo awusebenzi, ukuqondisa - ngaphandle nokuhlolwa kwabanye, ubuhlobo bomuntu siqu, uthando - kuvaliwe.
Ngifuna indoda enesimweni sokuzivocavoca, inombono omuhle kanye nezinwele, imisipha egubhayo, inakekelwa izingubo, ihlale icabanga ngokubonakala kwayo.
Indoda inzima ngokweqile kuye, iyazibeka ezifunweni ezikhathazayo nezikhathazayo ukuthi akayikuzifeza lezi zidingo, ngakho-ke akagcini ukwaneliseka njengokucasula.
Ukungahambisani nokubonakala kwawo kanye nezinyathelo ezibucayi ngokwemigomo yokuqinisekisa isimo sawo sangaphakathi - mhlawumbe udinga usizo lesazi sengqondo ukuze umuntu wakho athole ukuzethemba kuye futhi abe nomuzwa wokuthi uyabalulekile futhi uyaqaphela ukuthi kuyini.
Indoda yami ikholelwa ukuthi yilokho akuyikho, nokuthi kufanele ithandwe ngenxa yomphefumulo nengqondo, kodwa ngaphandle akusho lutho.
Indoda yenza owesifazane abe yisisulu 'sobudlelwane bakhe obubi' nehlangothini lokuphila, akayithandi umzimba wakhe, akafuni ukumnakekela, udelela ukukhanga kwangaphandle - okungukuthi, unezinkinga ezibonakalayo ezingokwengqondo. I-genius enobuchopho futhi engaphephile nayo, ingathanda, kodwa abesifazane abanezinkinga ezithile ezingokwengqondo.
Ukungasebenzi - indoda ngeke izinakekele nganoma yikuphi - lokhu kuyisimo sakhe, iqhuba "impi ngendaba" (njengomthetho, umuntu onjalo uyisicebi).
Othandekayo wami unesisu esincane, angakwazi ukuthenga ijajethi elincane. Kanye ngesonto uya ejimini, ebuka izingubo zakhe. Lezi zinto zibalulekile kuye, kodwa akuyona inkolo. Uyathokoza ngokubonakala kwakhe, kodwa uyaqaphela ukuthi eminyakeni yakhe isadingeka ukuziqapha ngokwakhe.
Lo ngumuntu owanele , ulalela umbono wesifazane wakhe, kodwa akahambanga ngaye. Qaphela uma ufuna ukushintsha into kuyo. Uma ubuhlobo bakho bujwayelekile futhi buphilile, uzoshukunyiswa kancane kusuka embinini ethi "shintsha into kuyo." Uma le nkulumo ingakulimazi, mhlawumbe unethemba lokuhola umuntu wakho futhi udwebe okuthile kuye ngokwakho. Ukuthambekela okunjalo ebuhlotsheni obuhle akuletha: uma ufeza umgomo wakho, uzothola "indodana" noma "isigqila", hhayi umuntu.