Ungaziphilisa kanjani uthando olungathandeki?

Sonke sasiyithanda futhi sisakhula futhi sisekhulile. Uthando luyakwazi ukusinika injabulo nokwaneliseka, futhi kungabangela ukukhathazeka okukhulu. Sibhekene nothando olungathandeki, sithola ubuhlungu futhi sikhathazekile kakhulu. Omunye usheshe ukwazi ukugwinya lolu buhlungu ngokwakho futhi akhohlwe uthando olungathandeki, futhi othile uwela ekucindezelekeni okukhulu futhi angeke aqhubeke nokuphila. Sizokutshela ukuthi ungaphilisa kanjani uthando olungathandeki futhi uqhubeke nokuqhubeka, ngoba impilo ayigodli lapho futhi konke okuphambi kwakho.

Uthando luyathinta kakhulu imizwa yethu. Njengoba kwavezwa odokotela basendulo, uthando luyisifo sengqondo nobuwula. Mhlawumbe uzomangala, kodwa ngisho nanamuhla, uthando oluhlangenwe nakho lubalinganiswa nodokotela ngezifo.

Eminyakeni embalwa eyedlule, intsha yaseNgilandi, yahlupheka futhi yahlupheka ngenxa yothando olungathandeki ukuthi wayengenakukwazi ukusebenza. Ngemuva kokuxoshwa emsebenzini wakhe ngenxa yokungabi khona kwakhe, wavuma futhi wayinqoba. Enkantolo, uthando olubi lwabonakala njengesisekelo esiyinhloko sokungabikho kwakhe.

E-Russia, lokhu akunakwenzeka ukuthi kudlulile, futhi inkantolo eyodwa ayengeke ibone njengesizathu esihle sokungabikho kwakhe, uthando olungathandeki. Kungakhathaliseki ukuthi sizizwa kabi kangakanani nokuthi singakanani ukuhlupheka futhi sihlupheka ngenxa yothando olungathandeki, siyaqhubeka emsebenzini, senza ibhizinisi futhi siphila ngangokunokwenzeka. Kwenzeka ukuthi uthando olungathandeki lusilethela ubuhlungu obungenakubekezeleka.

Bathi uthando aludluli masinyane, futhi singakwazi ukubhekana nalo ngaphezu konyaka owodwa. Kungakhathaliseki ukuthi kuyiqiniso noma cha, sizokwazi ukuthola kuphela uma sihlaziya imizwa yethu. Mhlawumbe, konke akukubi kakhulu njengoba sicabanga. Mhlawumbe, thina ngokwethu sizakhela le mizwa.

Into yokuqala esiyidingayo ukuziqonda yona yilapho sibhekene nothando olungathandeki noma olunesizungu? Eqinisweni, sesaba nje ukuhlala sisodwa, njengoba sijwayele ukuba khona njalo, njengoba sasicabanga, ngomuntu othandekayo. Okokuqala, akufanele sikwazi ukuzihlukanisa nathi nosizi lwethu. Uma unothando olungajabuli, olungathandabuzeki empilweni, okokuqala udinga ukukhuluma nomuntu. Ngicabanga ukuthi endaweni yakho kuyohlale ikhona abantu abaye bakubona lokhu kanye kanye empilweni yabo. Baya kuphela abazokwazi ukukunikeza iseluleko ngendlela yokuziphilisa ngayo uthando olungathandeki.

Kodwa ngokuvamile kuvame ukuthi sivaliwe kithi futhi asifuni ukukhuluma nanoma ubani. Nakuba kule nkathi yokuphila, sidinga ngempela ukusekelwa kwabantu abaseduze. Ngesizathu esithile, akuwona wonke umuntu okwazi ukutshela ngokuhlangenwe nakho kwabo. Pho kungani lokhu kwenzeka?

Njengoba izazi zengqondo zithi ngesikhathi sokuphumula nomuntu othandekayo, sibhekene nokuhlazeka. Uma sifunda ukuthi asisathandwa, ngalesi sikhathi umqansa wethu uthinteka. Uma ubuhlobo buphukile, ukuzethemba kwethu kwehla. Kubonakala ngathi akukho muntu ongasithanda, futhi kusukela kulokhu, sihlupheka kakhulu.

Kumele uqonde ukuthi uthando aluhlolisisi izimfanelo zakho futhi alubonakali ukufaneleka. Futhi uma uthola ukuthi awusathandwa, lokhu akusho ukuthi uyisiwula noma awubi, akukho uxhumano. Ekuphileni, noma yikuphi umuntu ohlangene okungenani kanye nangothando olungathandeki futhi lo mzwa ungabhekana nanjengezibonelo futhi njengomgcini wendlu. Noma ubani angabhekana nale nkinga.

Kufanele uqonde ukuthi noma yini ongenayo imfanelo nezimfanelo, awukwazi ukugcina uthando. Lapho silahlekelwa othandekayo bethu, sithola intukuthelo, intukuthelo, futhi siqale nokucabanga ngokuphindiselela. Kodwa lokhu kuyiphutha ngokuphelele futhi kumelwe silwe nalo mzwelo.

Ngokuvamile kwenzeka ukuthi abantu abaqede ubudlelwane, omunye nomunye, baqhubeke benamathele othandweni lwabo olungathandeki. Futhi ngalesi sikhathi asiqondi nakancane ukuthi asibambelele othandweni, kodwa ngenxa yokuhlangenwe nakho okuphakanyisiwe.

Ngezikhathi ezinjalo akufanele ucabange ngalokho okuhlangenwe nakho kwakho. Khumbula umuntu obenobudlelwane naye, cabanga ukuthi unomsebenzi omuhle nokuthi kungakanani okubi. Cabanga ngemuva, kungakhathaliseki ukuthi udinga lobu buhlobo futhi ufuna ngempela ukuqhubeka nokuzwa lobu buhlungu nokuhlazeka. Mhlawumbe awukho konke okuhle kumuntu wakho, futhi awuzange uhlangabezane nalowo. Ukuphila akumi futhi udinga ukuqhubeka futhi ungesabi ukuvumela inhliziyo yakho ukuba ithandane olusha.

Ngicabanga ukuthi ngenxa yeseluleko sethu, ungakwazi ukuziphilisa uthando olungathandeki.