Indlela yokwakha ubuhlobo nendoda imdala kakhulu kunayo?

Namuhla, ubuhlobo nomuntu bukhulile kunokuba wena ngokwakho ngeke kusimangaze. Abantu abazungezile bayathula, ngisho nabaningi bayavuma ukusebenzisana okunjalo. Abesifazane bathanda amadoda asebekhulile kunabo ngokwabo ngoba banamathela kakhulu ukuma ngezinyawo kunontanga noma abancane. Abantu abanjalo ekuphileni baye babona okuningi, banqoba izithiyo ezinzima, ukuze bafeze imigomo yabo. Kodwa nalaba bantu banebuthakathaka obuncane: bathanda abesifazane kakhulu kunabo. Bathanda uma umlingani wakhe enhle futhi encane kakhulu. Amadoda anjalo ebhodini lethu nabontshonalanga angatholakala.

Ake sibone ukuthi kungani abesifazane abaningi bakhetha ukwakha ubudlelwane nabantu abadala kunabo?

Abesifazane bahlale betheleka kulabo bantu abangafani nabo. Ikakhulukazi ngeminyaka. Abesifazane abaningi bangahlukaniswa zibe izinhlobo eziningana. Uhlobo lokuqala luhlanganisa nalabo besifazane abangalokothi babe nesifiso sokuba ngabaholi. Bakudinga izinto ezinokwethenjelwa, induduzo nokuthembela. Kuhlobo lwesibili lwabasifazane abanelisekile, abazange basuse isixazululo sezinkinga zabo emahlombe omunye, ngisho nendoda yabo. Bahlale benomthwalo wemfanelo ebuhlotsheni obuthathu besifazane yibo abazama njalo ukuba ngabaholi ebuhlotsheni.

Kodwa ubudlelwane nomuntu budala kakhulu kunowesifazane, uma kukhona umehluko oqinile, ngezinye izikhathi umphakathi awuwamukeli kahle. Abaningi kulaba besifazane ngibheka njengamafutha, abenaye ngemali yakhe nesikhundla sakhe. Uma umehluko eminyakeni yobudala awubalulekile, tshela iminyaka engu-2-3, akubonakali kakhulu, kodwa uma kusuka eminyakeni engu-5 kuya phezulu kuya phezulu, umehluko onjalo ubonakala.

Kungani abesifazane bekhetha? Owesifazane owayenqatshelwe ukunakekelwa kukayise ebuntwaneni, noma wayengenjalo, ke ufuna usizo kumuntu wakhe, ufuna ukugcinwa, ukuqapha nokuthandwa kokubili njengowesifazane futhi njengendodakazi. Futhi labo besifazane abazethemba, ngokwamadoda anjalo bayalingana nabo.

Okuhle ebuhlotsheni obunjalo ukuthi amadoda anjalo ahlangene nakho konke, ezenzweni nasebudlelwaneni. Futhi banomcebo othile wezinto ezibonakalayo, futhi bayaqiniseka ngakho konke. Abanayo ukwesaba futhi bayazi.

Amaminithi ebuhlotsheni obunjalo nakho nakho kwabo. Bangaba nomndeni nezingane ngemuva kwamahlombe abo, ngezinye izikhathi bangaqhathanisa nowesifazane wabo wangempela nabangaphambilini, babheke amaphutha kuye. Futhi kunezidingo ezahlukene phakathi kwendoda nowesifazane.

Ebudlelwaneni obunjalo, ungakwazi njalo ukuthembela kumuntu, uzokusiza owesifazane ukuba ahlakulele, asekele esimeni esinzima futhi anikeze usizo oludingekayo, zombili izinto ezibonakalayo nezingokomoya.