Umlando omncane.
Ezingxenyeni ezikude ezingama-70 e-United States kwakukhona inhlangano yabangewona abazali, owafaka igama elithi "Childfree". Izinganefree kusho ukukhululeka ezinganeni. Kukholelwa ukuthi le ncazelo yadalwa njengokungalingani nakakhulu "okungenamntwana" futhi kwakuhloswe ukugcizelela ukukhetha okukhululekile, kunokuba kube nokulimala nokulimala.
Leli gama lathandwa ekupheleni kwekhulu leminyaka elidlule, lapho iqembu lokuqala labantu abalandela ngale ndlela yokuphila lwakhiwa.
Okumangalisa ukuthi, abantu bezinkambo ezingezona zendabuko phakathi kwabameleli be-Childfree bancane. Ngokujwayelekile abantu abesilisa nabesifazane noma imibhangqwana abenqaba ngamabomu ukuqhubeka nohlobo.
Bangobani laba bantu?
Kuze kube manje, ezweni lapho abantu abaningi befuna ukuba ngabazali, abantu abangenabantwana, kunalokho, ukuphambuka, akuyona into evamile. Kodwa-ke, ukukhetha ekuhambeni kokuphila ngaphandle kwezingane, musa ukuhlukumezeka, ukuxolisa noma ukuphosa.
Abanye "abangenayo ingane" bakholelwa ukuthi kuyingozi ukubeletha izingane, ngoba lokhu kwenziwa ngaphandle kwemvume yabantwana futhi ekuqaleni udlame. Ukuzikhethela kwabo kungachazwa ukuthi izwe lethu aliyona indawo engcono kakhulu yokuphila ngokujabula, kunezingozi eziningi nosizi, imvelo embi, izifo eziningi.
Abanye bachaza ukukhetha kwabo ngokuhluleka kwabo kuba ngabazali abahle , ukungathandi ukudela impilo yabo kanye nenduduzo ngenxa yomunye umuntu.
Izazi zengqondo zikholelwa ukuthi iningi lalabo okuthiwa yizingane ezingenayo izingane noma ziye zabhekana nezinkinga nabazali noma abanye abantu abadala abathonya ukukhetha kwabo, kungenzeka ukuthi babezisulu zobudlova, noma bancane futhi banomqondo ongobugovu. Abanye bavele bengakwazi ukugcina izingane zabo.
Naphezu komfanekiso ozama ukwakha "ongenaye ingane" ezungezile uqobo, isithombe somuntu onomusa onokwethenjelwa, onokwethenjelwa, kaningi ngandlela-thile abantu abangaphumelelanga ekuthunjweni ngokwesaba noma izinkathazo zabo. Okufanayo, okukhethayo kungenxa yezizathu ezizwakalayo, ukuqonda futhi akusekelwe ezinkingeni ezikhona, amayunithi.
Kungashiwo ukuthi iningi "elingenayo ingane" lenze lokhu ngokukhetha ngokungenandaba, naphezu kwenkulumo-ze ye-reverse.
Ingabe kubi noma kuhle?
Ukufinyelela ukuhlolwa kwalesi senzakalo kusukela ekubukeni "okuhle noma kubi" akufanelekile. Kunoma yikuphi, lokhu kuyisinqumo somuntu esenziwe nguye. Futhi akukhathaleki ukuthi yiziphi izizathu ezenza lokhu kukhetha.
Kusukela ekubukeni kwezenhlalo, inkolo nezombangazwe, "ukungena ingane" ibhallip elingenalutho elingenzi umsebenzi oyisisekelo - ukuqhubeka kohlobo. Kusukela ekubukeni kwemibono yanamuhla, ngamunye wethu unelungelo lokunquma ukuthi angaphila, zingaki izingane okufanele zibe nazo nokuthi ngabe zikhona yini.
Kuyaziwa ukuthi abantu abaningi abaye bephuthelwa isikhathi lapho ukuzalwa kwengane kungenzeka, sizisole. Akekho ongakwazi ukubikezela ukusabela kokungenabantwana kwabo esikhathini esizayo. Omunye uyohlala enelisekile ngalesi simo, omunye uzokuzihlambalaza ngoba ebusheni bakhe wayenombono ongalungile empilweni.
Abaningi balabo abenqaba ukuzalwa nokufundiswa kwezingane, zama ukuthuthukisa, benze umsebenzi ophumelelayo, ungabe usaphila. Lokhu kuyancomeka, kodwa ngesikhathi esifanayo, azikho izibalo eziqinisekisa inani elikhulu labantu abahlakaniphile, abaphumelelayo phakathi kwalabo abangenazo izingane. Njengoba umkhuba ubonisa, ukutholakala kwenzalo akuphazamisi ukuqaliswa, kanti kwezinye izimo, kunomthelela ekwenzeni imigomo ephakeme, ngoba izingane ziyisisusa esihle sokuthuthukiswa.
Kunoma yikuphi, akekho onelungelo lokugweba abantu abaye banquma ukuyeka injabulo yokuba ngabazali, kanye nalabo abakhetha ukuba yibo kuphela futhi benqabe noma yiziphi ezinye izinzuzo. Kungakhathaliseki ukuthi imibono yalokhu kuhamba okuthandwayo iphutha, noma cha - isikhathi sizobonakala.
Ngo-2003, izibalo zase-United States zabonisa ukuthi abesifazane abangenabantwana abangaphansi kweminyaka engu-45 babe ngaphezu kuka-44%. Inani labashadile abangenabantwana likhula njalo ngonyaka.