Uma unesifo sokuhlukunyezwa kwengqondo

Ukulimala kwengqondo kuyingozi njengemvelo. Futhi imiphumela ingaba nzima kakhulu. Kuphela ukuphatha ukulimala kwengqondo kanye nokwehlukana, asivame ukusheshisa. Sithemba ukuthi lizodlula ngokwalo ... Nokho, umphefumulo womuntu ungagula isikhathi eside kakhulu, futhi ngezinye izikhathi sithwala ukukhathazeka kwengqondo yethu engapheli ngokuphila, futhi ngaphandle kokukhipha umthwalo obuhlungu ocindezelayo. Ngokwethembeka, kumele ngithi akuyona nje indaba yokungathembeki kosizo lwezingqondo. Ukuhlukunyezwa kwengqondo, ngokungafani nokuhlukunyezwa ngokomzimba, kungaba nzima kakhulu ukubona. Asikwazi ngisho nokuqagela ukuthi kwenzekani, nini futhi kanjani. Azikho ukuhlola okunjalo. "Ngakho-ke, nansi ukuphazamiseka, khona-ke endaweni yakho yokuzihlonipha, hhayi enkulu kakhulu, kodwa udala kakhulu, cishe iminyaka emithathu." "Kuhambisana nesehlukaniso sakho ngesikhathi." Yebo, sizophulukisa. " Eqinisweni, ukuhlola ubunzima benkinga nokuthola imbangela yangempela akusi njalo njalo. Yebo, kukhona umqondo wemigomo yemigomo yomcimbi. Sithi: "Ukuguqulwa komsebenzi, ngisho nokuhamba - kungukucindezeleka okuphindwe kabili," "Ukunakekelwa kwesiguli sombhede kuyinkimbinkimbi kakhulu futhi kuyethusa." Noma kunjalo, isisindo somgomo asihambisani ngaso sonke isikhathi ne-subjective. Umuntu oyedwa ophikisana no-boss uzoba uvivinyo olunzima, emva kwalokho angeke akwazi ukwenza imisebenzi yakhe, azivelele futhi ayeke ukuxhumana neqembu. Ngolunye uhlangothi, okufanayo kuyoba umthelela wokuphumelela okusha nokuzithuthukisa - futhi ngaphandle kwemizwa ekhethekile engalungile. Kuncike ekubalukeni kwangaphakathi kwalowo mcimbi, uhlobo lomuntu ngokwakhe futhi, nakanjani, isimo sokuphila jikelele. Omunye ngokuphelele, ekuboneni kuqala, isici esingenasici ngezinye izikhathi ngokwanele ukwenza isithombe somcimbi sibonakale ngokuphelele. Isibonelo, ukhiye. Imindeni emibili emisha ihlala ngaphansi kwezimo ezilinganayo, cishe ubuhlobo obulinganayo (hhayi obuhle kakhulu) phakathi komalokazana nomkhwekazi. Kodwa uninazala unesihluthulelo sefulethini labancane ("Ungumama," kusho umyeni), kanti omunye akwenzi. Izinga lokucindezeleka empilweni yomfazi kusuka kwinombolo yomndeni liphakeme kakhulu. Ngoba isihluthulelo sisho ukungafuni komyeni ukuhlukanisa nomama, ukulawula kwakhe okungapheli, ukubusa futhi, ngenxa yalokho, ukushayisana okuqhubekayo komalokazana. Ukucindezeleka komfazi womndeni wezinombolo ezimbili nakho kungabonakaliswa (ukungahambi kahle kobudlelwane nabazali akuletheli injabulo noma ubani), kodwa akuyona into eyingozi kakhulu. Uzoba okungenani engunaphakade, ngakho-ke angeke abe nomthelela omuhlungu kowesifazane osemusha.

Ekuqaleni kusukela ebuntwaneni
Inombolo ephawulekayo ye-psychotraumas siyabuyela ebuntwaneni, futhi lokhu kuyisithiyo sokwelashwa. Ngesikhathi siyazi ngesenzo somcimbi, sekuqhubeka iminyaka eminingi, futhi imiphumela yinkimbinkimbi kunzima ukuyiphatha. Kodwa ebuntwaneni sisengozini kakhulu, sisengozini ngokomzwelo futhi sincike kubantu abadala. Nakuba singakwazi ukusabela ngokuqondile (ukukhala, ukukhamuluka), kodwa ukuqonda isimo, ukuyisebenza ukuze kube buhlungu kakhulu futhi engenayo imiphumela emibi kakhulu, yebo, ayikwazi. Kuyabonakala sengathi yini engaba yingozi lapho abazali bekhohliwe ingane enkulisa? Akuyona ngokuqondile ngoba. Umama wayecabanga ukuthi ubaba uzoyithatha, ubaba - ukuthi umama. Yebo, ingane yahlala lapho amahora ambalwa, kodwa hhayi eyodwa kuphela, kodwa ngothisha. Kodwa-ke, iningi labantu abenze indaba enjalo bayikhumbula njengenye yezinto ezimbi kakhulu ekuphileni kwabo. Kuhle, uma abazali befuna ukuxolisa bese bezungeza ingane ngokunakekelwa nokukhathalela ukubhebhethekisa izinkinga. Futhi uma bethi: "Futhi kungani uchithe umhlengikazi? Ucabanga ukuthi abazali abanakho ezinye izinkathazo?" Umzwelo wokulahlwa, cishe, kulokhu awusoze wanyamalala. Ukuba umuntu omdala, umuntu angase angaboni le nkinga. Futhi lokho akuzondayo kuze kube manje, lapho umuntu ephuzile futhi ehlela amahlazo angempela ngalokhu, uhlobo lwalo ...

Yini okhononda ngayo?
Izinkinga zokuxhumana, uhlamvu oluphikisanayo, amahloni amakhulu ... Konke lokhu kungaba imiphumela ye-psychotrauma enolwazi. Abantu abanjalo bavame ukuthi "Ngihlala njalo" noma "Angikaze ngiye", bahluke emahlulelweni angabonakali futhi acacile. "Angiyikuvumela noma ubani ukuba ahlabelele nami." Kodwa ingabe ukuhleka-kungabe kubi? Kulo muntu - yebo. Ukuhleka ngaye kusho isifiso sokuhlazisa i-interlocutor.

Esinye isibonakaliso sengqondo ye-psychotrauma yi-reaction psychosomatic. Isibonelo, lapho kunzima ukuphefumula, umuntu uba namabala, ahlambalaza, ahlahlela. Futhi lokhu kungaba ngisho nokuvuselela okubuthakathaka. Kungokuthi nje isimo esibuhlungu futhi umzimba uphenduka ngendlela ebuhlungu kangaka. Ukukhathazeka, ukwesaba, okuhlangenwe nakho okwenzeka njalo endaweni engenalutho, ukulungiswa kwezinkinga ... Kamuva ukuleleka, ukukhanda ikhanda, ukuphazamiseka kokugaya, ubuhlungu enhliziyweni yendawo bengeziwe.

Umthandi ngokwakhe
Njengoba unesithakazelo esanele kwengqondo, isifiso sokuziqonda, umuntu angakwazi ukubhekana nezinkinga zakhe. Kodwa-ke, uma kunenhloso yokuphendukela kochwepheshe, kufanelekile ukufaka engqondweni ukuthi:

• ngisho ne-psychologist / psychotherapist engcono kakhulu emhlabeni akusizi ngalutho uma isiguli singafiki kuye yedwa, kodwa ngaphansi kwengcindezi (umama wami wathola isazi sengqondo, ngoba akanalo amandla okubuka indodakazi yakhe ihlupheka; intombi ingeluleka ukuba ngiye kumchwepheshe);
• isazi kufanele sikhethe, singagxila kuphela ezinsizeni zakhe ensimini yakhe, izinga lokudumisa, impendulo, kodwa futhi nokuthandwa komuntu siqu. Ekukhulumisaneni kumele kube mnandi, kulula futhi uzolile - kusadingeka ukhulume ngomuntu siqu;
• kusukela okokuqala kungcono (ukususa) ngeke. I-Psychology ayiyona imilingo, futhi izazi ze-psychologists azivumelisi i-wand magic, ukushayela zonke izinkinga kude, kodwa zisiza umuntu ukuba azikhandle futhi athole izindlela zokuxazulula inkinga.
  

Ukwehla kwezibazi ezingqondweni
Kungaba yisisulu ukucabanga ukuthi noma yimaphi ama-psychotrauma, kanye nokulimala ngokomzimba, uphulukiswa. Ngisho nabahlinzeki abahlinzayo abahle kakhulu ngeke babuyisele ingalo noma umlenze olahlekile. Ngakho-ke psychotherapists engcono ngeke bakwazi ukubuyisela impilo endala ngesimo lapho kwakukhona ngaphambi kokuba eziningi izenzakalo zidlule. Kungokufunda ukuhlala ezimweni ezintsha, ukwamukela ukulahlekelwa, ukudumazeka. Abantu abasinda ekuhlaselweni kwamaphekula, ubudlova, ngeke baphinde bafanane nokuqala. Ukushintsha uhlelo lwamagugu, ukubukwa empilweni, bayajabula futhi kwezinye izikhathi badumazekile. Ngenhlanhla, iningi le-psychotrauma libi kakhulu, futhi impumelelo yokwelashwa kwayo incike ekuziphatheni okulungile. Ukuzitholela ngalesi sikhathi kufanele kube ngokucophelela, ngokuncane, ngesihawu. Yakha imvelo enhle, uhlele iholidi, mhlawumbe uthenge okuthile okukade kuphundukile.

Yona kanye isimo esabangela ukuhlukunyezwa, kufanele kucatshangelwe kuzo zonke izinhlangothi. Thola okungenani okuthile okuhle ("kodwa kungase kube kubi nakakhulu"), ukucabanga ukuthi kuyasiza ukukhipha kuwo. Lokhu kunciphisa kakhulu imiphumela, ngoba "ukuxoxisana" kungabandakanyi ukucindezeleka ngokweqile, kwenza kube lula ukubheka okwenzekayo ngaphandle. Kunzima kakhulu uma inkinga ingekho esikhathini esedlule, kodwa okwamanje. Uma umuntu ephoqeleka ukuba aphile ezimweni ezamzwisa ubuhlungu, kungcono nakakhulu ukufunda ukuhlala kude. Futhi-ke, njalo ngangokunokwenzeka cabanga ukuthi esikhathini esizayo esiseduze konke kuzoshintsha ukuthi kube ngcono.