Ngakho-ke yiziphi izimfihlo zokuxhumana okuzethembayo nokulula? Imfihlo eyinhloko yokukhulumisana okuphumelelayo: uma uwedwa nawe, khona-ke bonke abanye bayothandekayo futhi kulula ukuxhumana nawe. Ukuthola izihloko ezifanele zokuxoxa akuyona inkinga enjalo. Iyiphi incwadi yokugcina oyifunayo, yimuphi umbukiso we-movie, ucabangani ngabalingisi besikhathi noma abaculi? Imibuzo elula ekuboneni kuqala izoba yizihloko ezinhle kakhulu zokuxhumana okunobungane. Isibonelo, ungaba ibhulogi evamile - kuyisisekelo esihle sokuqeqeshwa okuthile ngokuhleleka. Uma ufunda ukubhala imicabango yakho ngendlela abanye abazofunda ngayo amarekhodi akho, khona-ke ekukhulumeni ngomlomo akufanele ube nezinkinga ezikhethekile, futhi ukuxhumana kuzoba lula futhi kuqiniseke.
Kodwa-ke, konke okubanjwayo ukuthi uthanda umsebenzi onzima kakhulu intombazane. Ema phambi kwesibuko, kubonakala sengathi sizibukeka ngeglasi elikhulu, bese sibona lonke iphutha leziphambeko, okungeke likwazi ukulifihla, futhi alikwazi ukuhlala nabo. Ingabe ufuna ukuthi sikutshele imfihlo enkulu? Konke lokhu "ukwehluleka" kubonakala kubanikazi babo kuphela, kodwa labo abakuzungezile abaqapheli noma bamane nje bangabanaki. Kodwa-ke, ukungaqiniseki okunikeza izinkimbinkimbi zakho kuyazizwa kahle, futhi ukuxhumana akuqiniseki.
Indlela yokwenza kulesi simo ngokufanele? Kudingeka ushintshe ngokushesha, futhi kube ngcono. Zama ukuqinisekisa ukuthi umhlane wakho uhlale njalo, ngisho noma ugibele izithende eziphakeme, futhi unesikhwama esikhulu ezandleni zakho. I-pose kufanele ibe mahhala ngangokunokwenzeka, futhi izwi - elicacile, elicacile futhi elimnandi. Wena, mhlawumbe, uzomangala ukuthi ngokushesha kangakanani, lapho ubheka kuqala, izintambo ezinjalo zizoshintsha kakhulu isimo sengqondo kuwe. Gqoka kuphela lezo izingubo ozithandayo ngempela, futhi uzizwa uqiniseka futhi zikhangayo. Futhi ungakhohlwa ukuthi into enhle yizinto ezincane, ngakho ungakhohlwa mayelana nezesekeli nemininingwane yokugqoka, njengebhande, isikhwama noma i-hoop. I-Mood up? Kuhle! Kumele uqinisekise ukuthi izingubo zakho zihlale zihlanzekile futhi zihlanzekile.
Futhi manje, sinokuqiniseka okwengeziwe. Ukufeza imfihlo yesibili yokukhulumisana okulula, udinga ukufunda ukuthi ungatshela kanjani izindaba ngendlela enhle nezithakazelisayo. Uma ugcina idayari, zama ukubhala manje hhayi nje ngemizwa yakho engokomzwelo, kodwa uhlaziye indaba elandelanayo nendaba yalokho owabonayo lapho uya ezifundweni zobuso. Noma kunjalo kukhona ukuzivocavoca okulula okulula. Cabanga ngendaba ethile yokuthoma, isibonelo, indaba encane mayelana nokuthi i-butterfly enhle ixube kanjani imbali yangempela, nembali egqoke, bese isitshela ebusweni bezinhlamvu ezahlukene. Futhi kanjani? Kwavela? Futhi manje, balahlekelwa lesi simo: qala ukumtshela umuntu wesithathu ngendlela ejulile, bese ehlaziya noma ehlaziya. Uma ngabe sonke sishiya, bese ufika nezinye izimo futhi uzicubungele ngokwakho.
Kunezinhlobo ezimbili zabathengisi bezindaba abantu abathanda ukulalela ikakhulukazi. Abokuqala yibo abangakwazi ukuhleka (akudingeki ukuthi batshele izindaba ze-"jaded" kanye nama-anecdotes, okungcono uthi okuthile okusha, okungavamile nokuthokoza), owokugcina - onganikeza iseluleko esisebenzayo (konke kuxhomeke kuwe lapha). Ungakhetha inketho oyithandayo ngaphezulu. Okokuqala, yenza kancane, bese uqala ukuhlala nabangani bakho ngesibindi, okuyiqiniso ukuthi bayakujabulela imizamo yakho. Ngokushesha uzokwazi ukubona ukuthi ukukhulumisana kwakho kuzoba nokuqiniseka futhi kungabonakali.
Futhi ungakhohlwa ukuthi akekho ozolalela ngisho nendaba ethakazelisayo futhi ethakazelisayo uma umtshela ukuthi uzothula, ungalondekile, futhi ngeke ubuke emehlweni, kodwa endaweni ethile, ukuxhumana kufanele kube lula. Uma ufuna ukwaziwa ngokuthi unkulunkulukazi wokuxhumana, khona-ke ukubukeka kwakho kufanele kube kuhle, futhi ukuzethemba ngokwempela kuyinsimbi. Unganaki izinkinga ezincane, njenge-mascara evuvukile noma umcibisholo we-pantyhose. Ngokuvamile, ziqinisekise ukuthi uhle futhi uhle kakhulu, futhi abanye abantu bayakukholelwa futhi, futhi umkhawulo wokuxhumana uzonyamalalala.
Yini okufanele ngiyenze?
Smile. Awukwazi ngisho nokucabanga ukuthi lesi sikhali sisebenza kahle kangakanani. Futhi ungabe uvilapha futhi futhi ukusebenzisa le nqubo ukuheha ukunakwa kwabangani bakho kanye nabadlulayo nje.
Yiba nengqondo. Uma uhleka usulu, akudingeki ucasule noma uhlazise noma ubani. Ngisho noma i-joke encane izophumelela, kunethuba elincane lokwenza izitha ezimbalwa noma izitha zangempela ezingeke zilahlekelwe ithuba lokuziphindiselela kuwe.
Yiba ovulekile ekukhulumisaneni . Awusona i-puppy enezinyosi, hhayi ngisho ne-Ice Princess. Ungesabi ukutshela izindaba ezimnandi ngawe. Ukuzihleka akusona amahloni, kodwa ngokuphambene nalokho, kumnandi. Njengoba umuntu onomqondo wokuhlekisa uhlala ethakazelisayo futhi ejabulisayo ekukhulumisaneni.
Yini engcono ukuyeka noma nini?
Ukuhleka . Ngokwenza kanjalo, kungenzeka ukuthi uzothola abantu abanomqondo ofanayo abazokusekela futhi bakusize "ukugeza amathambo" konke okulandelana. Kodwa-ke, lesi simo sinenkohliso kakhulu, ngoba abantu oxhumana nabo abangebona abangane, bafuna ukuthola ulwazi oluphikisanayo kuphela.
I-flattery . Ingabe uthi ukuncoma okuthokozelayo wonke umuntu olandelanayo kanye nakho konke, enethemba lokuthi ngokwenza kanjalo ukwandisa amathuba okuthi kukhona okuyoshiwo kuwe, noma yini ejabulisayo? Futhi lapha futhi ngeze! Unkulunkulukazi wangempela awudingi amasu anjalo.
Imizwa . Ukungavikeleki kwakho kungabalwa kahle - ngendlela yakho yokuxhumana, ukuma, ukunyakaza, njll. Thatha umoya ojulile futhi uqiniseke ukuthi ubukeka uphelele: izingubo zihlala kahle, i-manicure ayihloli futhi izinwele aziyiziphazamisi-ke mane ujabule futhi ukhulume. Kuthiwani ukucindezeleka ngenxa yezinto ezincane, uma kungenzeka ukuba ujabule ukuphila nje.