Ukwahlukanisa ibhizinisi eliyinkimbinkimbi, futhi, okokuqala, ngokuziphatha. Nakuba uhlangothi lwezinto zokuhlukana ezweni lanamuhla lukhungathekisa kakhulu. Ngakho-ke, ngemva kokuhlukanisa, ngokuvamile izinhlangothi zombili zidumazekile futhi zicasule. Futhi, ngeshwa, akukwenzeka njalo lapho abantu behlala ebuhlotsheni obuhle ngemuva kokuhlukanisa. Kodwa-ke, imibhangqwana ethile idinga ukubuyisela ubuhlobo ngemva kokuhlukanisa. Ngokuvamile, lokhu kwenzeka lapho umyeni nomfazi wangaphambili benabantwana.
Kulesi simo, ayikho indlela yokwenza ngaphandle kobudlelwano obuvamile. Phela, akekho ofuna ukulimaza ingane yengane evele ihlukumezeka kakhulu. Kodwa ukuthi ungathonya kanjani ukubuyiselwa kobuhlobo ngemva kokuhlukana komyeni kumkakhe futhi ngokufanayo?
Gcina ngokwakho
Okokuqala, ukuze ubuyisele ubuhlobo ngempumelelo, kubalulekile ukuthi izinhlangothi zombili zinesithakazelo kulokhu. Phela, uma indoda noma owesifazane ezonda umlingani wakhe wangaphambili ekuphileni, kunzima ukukhuluma ngobuhlobo obuvamile. Ngakho-ke, ukuze ufunde indlela yokuxhumana ngokujwayelekile komunye nomunye, okokuqala, udinga ukufunda ukuvimbela imizwelo yakho. Khumbula njalo ukuthi ungabona izingane ozithandayo umama nobaba ozithandayo. Ngakho-ke, izingxabano phakathi kwakho zicindezelekile kakhulu kubo. Njalo uma ufuna ukuxabana ne-ex, khumbula lokhu futhi uzigcine usesandleni sakho.
Ngeke kube kuhle ukukhumbula ukuthi uma umuntu ongeke afune ukuba nobunye naye manje ubuhlobo obuthandayo. Yiqiniso, kwafika ukudumazeka, kodwa lokhu akufanele kugcizelelwe. Khumbula nje ukuthi lo muntu unemfanelo emihle, ngakho ungamzonda njalo futhi ucabange njengento embi. Uma ufika ukumbona ngemuva kwesahlukaniso, zama ukucabanga ngezinto ezinhle ezixhunywe naye. Khona-ke ukubuyiselwa kobuhlobo kuyoba lula futhi kulula.
Ungaphazamisi empilweni yomuntu siqu
Esinye isizathu, ngokuvamile esiba imbangela yokuxabana phakathi komyeni nomfazi wangaphambili-isifiso sokulawula impilo yomuntu siqu. Ngokuvamile ngisho nokushiya, abashade abasha bakholelwa ukuthi banelungelo lokukwazi konke nokukhombisa ukuthi benzeni nokuthi benzeni. Lokhu kuziphatha akulungile neze. Manje awusekho umbhangqwana, ngakho-ke wonke umuntu ukhululekile ukwenza futhi enze lokho akufunayo ngempilo yakhe, uma lokhu, okwenzeki, kungathinti ingane. Ngakho-ke, ungabuzi umyeni wangaphambili ukuthi uhlala kanjani, ohlala naye kanye neminye imininingwane yomuntu. Inkulumo kufanele ihleleke ngokwengeziwe, ngakho-ke akukho sizathu sokuya kubantu ngabanye futhi ukhumbule izikhalazo ezinesikhathi eside. Yebo, lapho isihloko sokukhulumisana ingane ejwayelekile. Kulokhu, bobabili abesilisa nabesifazane banesithakazelo esivumelanayo, ngakho kaningi, akukhona ngenxa yalokho. Uma-ke, ngokungazelelwe kuvele ukungqubuzana kulo mhlaba, akufanelekile ukusola owokuqala ngokuba yisiphukuphuku nokungaqondi lutho. Zama ukulalela umbono wakhe futhi uhlole ngokucophelela ukuthi ulungile kangakanani. Mhlawumbe umbono wakhe ulungile futhi udinga ukulalela, futhi ungashiyi ngokushesha izimpendulo zakhe.
Ukukhulumisana nomyeni wangaphambili noma umfazi akudingeki ukuba akhumbule okwenzekile esikhathini esidlule, uma lokhu kungenjalo, akusikho izinkumbulo ezinhle. Khumbula ukuthi zonke izingxabano zakho zingxabano futhi ukucasuka sekuvele kuvele futhi ngeke kuphindwe. Ngakho-ke kungani uqala ukuzivumelanisa ngokumelene nomunye? Yiba abantu abahlakaniphile futhi uvumele ukuthi uqhubeke uphila. Ngempela, empeleni, izingxabano phakathi kwalabo abashadile ziyaqhubeka kuze kube yilapho zingavumeli izikhalazo zabo ngokuphelele. Uma ungakwazi ukuthethelela owokuqala, isimo sakho sengqondo siyashintsha ngokuphawulekayo kusuka embi ukuya ekungathathi hlangothi. Ngisho noma yena ngokwakhe eqala ukuya empini, awusoze weseka isinyathelo sakhe, ngoba ngeke kube mnandi kuwe.
Uma ubuhlobo bakho buphela ngesehlukaniso, akufanele neze ucabange ukuthi umyeni noma umfazi wangaphambili wayonakalise impilo yakho futhi wathatha okungcono kakhulu. Khumbula ukuthi unezinkumbulo eziningi ezinhle, futhi okubaluleke kakhulu, izingane eziletha injabulo kokubili.