Izibulo lihlale libhekene nokunciphisa ukunakekelwa kwabazali lapho ingane yesibili izalwa, futhi konke uthando nokukhathalelwa kwabiwe phakathi kwalaba babantwana ababili. Umntwana omdala uzizwa sengathi "usebuswe embusweni", futhi ulahlekelwa isikhundla sakhe sokuba yedwa, ngoba lokhu kuyinto ephazamisayo.
Njengoba kuboniswe izibalo zokubala okuhloswe ngazo ekutadisheni izindlela zokuphila zezingane zakudala nezingane ezincane, impumelelo enkulu itholakele ngokuqondile ngabazali bokuqala - abangaba ngu-64% phakathi kwabadumile, 46% - ngabantwana besibili. Isizathu esiyinhloko salokhu yisici sengqondo: ingane ekhulile, eyazithola esesimweni lapho kudingeka khona ukuvikela indawo yakhe elangeni lapho "umncintiswano" evela khona, kufanele ifeze imigomo ebalulekile emphakathini. Abahlengikazi banomthwalo wemfanelo kubancane, bazizwa benesibopho sabo, yingakho baqala ukuthola amakhono okuphila kusukela ebuntwaneni. Yingakho zikhula zibe ngabantu abadala abakhuthele futhi abaphumelelayo.
Ngokuvamile kwenzeka ukuthi izibulo kufanele libhekane nesimo esicindezelayo, akavumelani ngaso sonke isikhathi kalula nesimo esisha esihlobene nokuzalwa komzalwane noma udadewabo. Kubalulekile ukulungiselela owokuqala ingane yesibili, ukushintsha emndenini ngenhloso. Kunengqondo ngisho nokulahlekelwa yizimo ezingenzeka, umtshele mayelana nezinguquko ezizayo futhi uqhubeke nokugcina imiyalo evamile yokunakekelwa kwabazali. Uma kungenjalo, izibulo lakho lingabaza ukubaluleka kwalo nokubaluleka kwakho.
Ingane yesibili ikhula, njengomthetho, ingakhathazeki kancane futhi inethemba elihle, njengoba likhula emkhathini wesimo sengqondo esivele sathuthukile sabazali. Ngaphezu kwalokho, lapho ingane yesibili ivela emndenini, abazali sebevele benolwazi nangokwengeziwe, bayaqiniseka ukuthi imvelo yomndeni ithule ukukhulisa. Nakuba, njengoba ochwepheshe bekusho, abazali abakhona manje bancane amathuba okuba "bakhule" izilwane ezifuywayo futhi bazikhokhele kancane kunezizukulwane zokuqala. Nokho, noma kunjalo, isimo sengqondo sokuziphatha sabazali ngokuvamile sihlanganiswa nezingane ezincane. Kwenzeka ukuthi abasebancane bahlala engxenyeni ye "baby" isikhathi eside, abavame ukuhileleka empilweni yomndeni, ungavumeli ekuxoxweni kwemibuzo "yabantu abadala": "Lokhu kuyinhlangano engumdala. Iya kwelinye igumbi. " Ngomntwana wesibili, umfowabo omdala noma udade uba umholi, abancane bazama ukulingana naye.
Ngezinye izikhathi kunezinkinga ezithile empilweni yomntwana wesibili, lapho umoya ubonakala khona, kanti omncane unesifiso sokubamba umuntu omdala bese emfica. Ukungaqiniseki kwalokhu kuyisici esiyinhloko senye uchungechunge lwezinkinga zengqondo ekuthuthukiseni.
Kwenzeka ukuthi abazali, ngokungazi, bakha umncintiswano phakathi kwezingane ngokungazi. Njengoba esho: "Lokhu ngeke kwenzeke nakakhulu kunodadewabo (umfowenu)", abazali abakhuthazi ingane noma ukusekelwa, kodwa, ngokuphambene nalokho, bamenywa ukuncintisana. Khona-ke abantwana baqala ukuzwa ubuhlungu ukuthi ngeke babe ngabokuqala. Ukwesaba ukunqotshwa kuthinta izimfanelo zabo. Ingane ingayeka ukuzibonakalisa ngesibindi, enenjongo, enamandla, enenkani, lapho ingeke iphumelele "emncintiswaneni" wokudala. Yingakho izingane ezincane zivame ukuboniswa isikhundla se "othembekile", umqondo wemithwalo yemfanelo uyancipha.
Ngokuvamile kwenzeka ukuthi ngokufika kwengane yesibili, kunokuthuthukiswa esimweni somndeni, abashadile abanamathuba okungavumelani. Ngesikhathi esifanayo, ngokufika kwengane yesibili, umthombo omusha wokuhlangenwe nakho kwabazali ukuphikisana phakathi kwezingane.
Umzamo wabazali wokuxazulula zonke ukungavumelani nokuphikisana okuvela phakathi kwezingane, ngokwabo, nokukholelwa ukuthi ngokuhamba kwesikhathi zonke izinkinga ziyophela - lokhu kuyiphutha elivamile mayelana nabazali kubantwana abancane nabakhudlwana. Kubalulekile ukuthi izingane zikwazi ukuthi abazali bayabazethemba ekuxazululeni izingxabano phakathi kwabo. Khona-ke, cishe, izingane zizozimela ngokuzimela ukuthi zithatha umthwalo wemfanelo wokwakha ubudlelwane obuseduze ngemva kokungezwani. Ngezinye izikhathi kubalulekile ukuthi ezinye izingane zikwazi ukuthi zibaluleke kangakanani futhi zibaluleke kubazali bazo, futhi ukuze bakhangele abantu abadala, baqala ukuxabana futhi bathole ukuthi abazali babo bathatha ukuthini. Kulesi simo, uma kungekho lutho olunzulu olwenzeka ezinganeni zakho (ezisongela izimpilo zabo), kungcono ukwamukela isikhundla sokungeneleli - lena yindlela engcono kakhulu ezimweni zezingxabano zezingane. Cishe uqaphele ukuthi izingane, ukuxabana, emva kwesikhathi ziqhubeka kanjani ukudlala ngokuthula. Ukunamathela ekungathathi hlangothi, uma ngabe "uhileleke" ekuxazululeni impikiswano, ungahlukanisi phakathi kwezingane umdala, njengomuntu ophethe, okufanele akhiphe.
Uma usola owokuqala ngezinkinga zentsha, kuyodumaza kuphela owokuqala ukuba angafuni ukuba nomthwalo wemfanelo futhi uzokwehlisa ukuzwelana nomfowabo noma udadewabo omncane. Uma abazali beqala ukumangaza noma ukuhlazisa umdala phambi kwengane yesibili, khona-ke lokhu kuziphatha kwabazali bamazibulo kukopishwe futhi kudluliselwe kwabancane. Cishe bonke abazali kwakudingeka babheke ngentshiseko umdala ngesikhathi sokunakekelwa noma kumnandi ngomntwana. Ezimweni ezinjalo kubaluleke kakhulu ukuba umdala azizwe edingekayo futhi abalulekile. Ngakho-ke, ungasho okuthile okuzobonisa ukubaluleka kwalo: "Ungumsizi wami, ngingenzani ngaphandle kwakho!" Ukubonga kwabazali nozwela, okukhulunywe yizibulo, kungadlulisa imizwa yentshiseko yomntwana omdala. Ukungathembeki nokukhathazeka kuyanyamalala, kubuyela ekutholeni injabulo nokuzinikela kwangaphambili. Zama ukuhlanganyela ngothando ngothando lwakho phakathi kwezingane, khona-ke ukukhathazeka kwezingane ezindala ngeke zibonakalise futhi ziphazamise nabo ekuphileni kwamuva.
Ezingxabaneni zezingane zama ukuzulazula ukuthola ukuthi ngubani olungile, ubani okufanele abekwe icala. Zombili zicasuliwe, zicasuliwe, udinga ukukhombisa ukuthi uzizwa zombili, zizwe futhi wazi ukuthi zifunani.