Kule minyaka yobudala, izingane zizenzela ukutholakala okukhulu nokubalulekile ukuthi konke kunesiqalo nokuphela, kuhlanganise nokuphila komuntu. Ingane iqala ukuqaphela ukuthi ukuphela kokuphila kungenzeka kuye nakubantwana bakhe. Abantwana bokugcina besaba kakhulu, ngoba besaba ukulahlekelwa abazali babo. Abantwana bangabuza imibuzo efana nalokhu: "Ukuphila kwavelaphi?" Kungani wonke umuntu efa? Bangaki abakhulu babahlala? Kungani efa? Kungani bonke abantu behlala? ". Ngezinye izikhathi izingane ziyesaba amaphupho amabi ngokufa.
Ukuphika kwesifo sokufa kwengane kuvela kuphi?
Kuze kube yiminyaka emihlanu umntwana ubona konke okukuzungezile njengento ephilile futhi ehlala njalo, akanalo ulwazi lokufa. Kusukela eneminyaka engu-5 ubudala, ingane iqala ukuthuthukisa ukucabanga okungaqondakali, ingqondo yengane. Ngaphezu kwalokho, ngalesi sikhathi ingane iba nengqondo ngokwengeziwe. Uba nesifiso sokuthi siphi isikhala nesikhathi, uyaqonda lokhu futhi ufika esiphethweni sokuthi yonke impilo inesiqalo nesiphetho. Lokhu kutholakala kuyethusa ngaye, ingane iqala ukukhathazeka ngempilo yakhe, ngekusasa lakhe kanye nabathandekayo bakhe, yesaba ukufa esikhathini samanje.
Ingabe zonke izingane ziyesaba ukufa?
Cishe wonke amazwe, izingane ezineminyaka engu-5-8 ubudala ziyesaba ukufa, zithola ukwesaba. Kodwa lokhu kwesaba kuboniswa ngendlela yomuntu wonke. Konke kuncike kulokho okwenzekayo empilweni yakhe, ingane ehlala kuyo, yiziphi izici eziqondene nomlingiswa wengane. Uma ingane kule minyaka ilahlekelwe abazali bayo noma abantu abaseduze, khona-ke unamandla kakhulu, esaba kakhulu ukufa. Futhi, lokhu kwesaba kutholakala kaningi ngalabo bantwana abangenalo ithonya elinamandla lomuntu (elivezwe ngendlela yokuvikela), ngokuvamile bephethe lesi sifo kanye nezingane ezizwelayo. Ngokuvamile amantombazane aqala ukuzwa lokhu kwesaba ngaphambili kunabesilisa, banamahloni amaningi kakhulu.
Kodwa-ke, kunezingane ezingesabi ukufa, azi ukuthi uzizwa kanjani ukwesaba. Ngezinye izikhathi lokhu kwenzeka uma abazali bedala zonke izimo, ukuze izingane zingenaso isizathu esisodwa sokucabanga ukuthi kukhona okumele besabe, okuzungezile yiyona "izwe lokufakelwa". Ngenxa yalokho, izingane ezinjalo zivame ukungabi nandaba, imizwelo yabo iba yinto elula. Ngakho-ke, abanayo imizwa yokukhathazeka ngenxa yokuphila kwabo noma impilo yabanye. Ezinye izingane - ezivela kubazali abanomlutha wotshwala ongapheli - abanakho ukwesaba ukufa. Abazizwa, banomzwelo ophansi ngokomzwelo, futhi uma izingane ezinjalo zizwa imizwelo, khona-ke nje kuphela.
Kodwa kuyiqiniso ngempela futhi amacala anjalo lapho izingane zingaboni futhi zingaboni ukwesaba ukufa, abazali babo abajabule futhi banethemba. Izingane ngaphandle kokuphazamiseka nje azihlangabezi nakho okunjalo. Noma kunjalo, ukwesaba ukuthi ukufa kungenzeka nganoma isiphi isikhathi kukhona ezinganeni eziningi zasenkulisa. Kodwa yilokho ukwesaba, ukuqaphela nokuhlangenwe nakho kwayo, okuyisinyathelo esilandelayo ekuthuthukiseni ingane. Uyosinda ekuhlangenwe nakho kwakhe kokuphila ekuqondeni ukuthi yini ukufa kanye nalokho okusongelayo.
Uma lokhu kungeke kwenzeke empilweni yengane, khona-ke lokhu kwesaba kwengane kungenza uzizwe kamuva, ngeke kuphinde kuvuselelwe futhi, ngakho-ke, kuyokuvimbela ekuthuthukiseni phambili, kuqiniswe kuphela ukwesaba okunye. Futhi lapho kukhona ukwesaba, kunemingcele eminingi ekuziqapheleni, kunethuba elincane lokuzizwa likhululekile futhi lijabulile, lithandwa futhi lithande.
Yiziphi abazali okufanele bazi ukuze bangalimazi
Abantu abadala - abazali, izihlobo, izingane ezindala - ngokuvamile ngegama noma ukuziphatha kwabo okungenandaba, ukwenza, ngaphandle kokuqaphela, ukulimaza ingane. Udinga ukwesekwa ekubhekaneni nesimo sesikhashana sokwesaba ukufa. Kunokuba akhuthaze umntwana futhi amsekele, ukwesaba okwedlulele nakakhulu kuza kuye, ngaleyo ndlela kuphazamise ingane futhi kumshiye yedwa ngokwesaba. Ngakho-ke imiphumela eholela ekungenakulingeni empilweni yengqondo. Ukuze ukwesaba okunjalo kungathathi izinhlobo ezihlukahlukene zokukhubazeka kwengqondo esikhathini esizayo kwengane, futhi ukwesaba ukufa akuhlali okungapheli, abazali kudingeka bazi ukuthi bangenzani:
- Ungamhlekisi ngaye mayelana nokwesaba kwakhe. Ungamhleki ingane.
- Ungamangaleli ingane ngenxa yokwesaba kwakhe, ungamvumeli abe nomuzwa wecala ngenxa yokwesaba.
- Ungamnaki ukwesaba kwengane, ungenzi sengathi ungaziqapheli. Kubalulekile ukuthi izingane zikwazi ukuthi "ohlangothini lwazo". Ngokuziphatha okunzima okunjalo, izingane zizokwesaba ukwamukela ukwesaba kwabo. Futhi emva kwalokho ukuzethemba kwengane kubazali kuyokwenza buthakathaka.
- Ungaphonsa amagama angenalutho wengane yakho, isibonelo: "Niyabo? Asiyesabi. Nawe, akufanele ukwesabe, yiba nesibindi. "
- Uma othile ovela othandekayo efa ngokugula, akufanele ukuchazele lokhu ingane yakho. Njengoba ingane iveza la magama amabili futhi isaba njalo lapho abazali bayo begula noma yena.
- Ungahlanganyeli ezingxoxweni ezivamile nengane ngokugula, mayelana nokufa komunye umuntu, mayelana nenhlekelele yomuntu onomntwana oneminyaka efanayo.
- Ungakhuthazi izingane ukuthi zithole igciwane lesifo esibulalayo.
- Ungazihlukanisi ingane yakho, ungamnakeli ngokungadingekile, mnike ithuba lokuthuthukisa ngokuzimela.
- Ungavumeli ingane ibheke konke ku-TV futhi inqabe ukubuka ama-movie ashaqisayo. Ukukhala, ukukhala, ukububula okuvela ku-TV, kubonakala emoyeni wengane, ngisho noma elele.
- Ungalethi ingane yakho enkathini yokukhulelwa emngcwabeni.
Kungcono kakhulu ukwenza okuthile
- Kubazali, kufanele kube ngumthetho wokuthi ukwesaba kwabantwana kungenye isignali yokukhathalela nakakhulu, ukuvikela isimiso sabo sezinzwa, lokhu kuyisimo sosizo.
- Ukwelapha ukwesaba kwengane ngenhlonipho, ngaphandle kokukhathazeka okungadingekile noma ukungafuni ukukhathazeka ngokuphelele. Yiba njengokungathi uyayiqonda, sekuyisikhathi eside waziwa ngalezo zinsabiso futhi akeke wamangala ukwesaba kwakhe.
- Ukubuyisela ukuthula kwengqondo, unike isikhathi esengeziwe kwengane, ukukhathazeka nokukhathalela.
- Dala zonke izimo ekhaya ukuze umntwana akwazi ukutshela ngokumesaba kwakhe ngaphandle kokuxwayisa.
- Dala "ukuphazamisa ukuphazamiseka" ngenxa yokwesaba kwengane nokuhlangenwe nakho okungathandekayo - hamba naye esiteshini, cinema, yaseshashalazini, vakashela lezi zikhangayo.
- Okunye kuhilela ingane ngezinto ezithakazelisayo nezithameli, ngakho-ke uzophazanyiswa futhi azongena ekuhlangenwe nakho kwangaphakathi entshisekelo entsha.
- Kubalulekile ukutshela ingane ngokucophelela mayelana nokufa komuntu ovela ezihlotsheni noma ezihlotsheni. Okuhle kakhulu, uma uthi ukufa kwenzeka ngenxa yobudala noma isifo esingavamile kakhulu.
- Zama ukungathumeli ingane kule nkathi yodwa ukuya endaweni yokulala eholidini ukuthuthukisa impilo yakho. Zama ukuhlehlisa imisebenzi ehlukahlukene (i-adenoid kwengane) ngenkathi ukwesaba ukufa kuyingane.
- Zama ukunqoba ukwesaba nokwehluleka kwakho, njengokumesaba ukuduma nokukhanyisa, izinja, amasela, njll, ungabonisi ingane, uma kungenjalo "angabamba".
- Uma udlulisela ezihlotsheni ngesikhathi sezingane zakho, bacele ukuba balandele iseluleko esifanayo.
Uma abazali beqonda imizwa kanye nokuhlangenwe nakho kwezingane, bamukela izwe labo langaphakathi, basize ingane ukuthi ikwazi ukubhekana ngokushesha ngokumesaba kwayo kwengane, ukwesaba ukufa, futhi ngenxa yalokho, iya esigabeni esilandelayo sokuthuthukiswa kwengqondo.