Umehluko eminyakeni
Enye yezinto zokuqala abazali ababhekana nazo: ngakanani ubudala ingane ezoba lula ukubona ukubonakala komzalwane noma udadewabo. Izazi zengqondo azicebisi ukuqagela ukuzalwa kwesibili (ingane yesithathu, yesine) ngaphansi kwezibulo. Uhlale efika kuleli zwe ngokuhamba kwesikhathi! Kodwa ukwazi izici zonyaka ngamunye akuphazamisi.
• Eminyakeni eyi-1,5-2
Owokuqala akaqondi okuningi, "ama-parrots" imizwa yabazali futhi, cishe, kalula futhi nje izothatha kuwe uthando kumncinyane. Ngokuvamile, izingane zizikhumbula zinezingane ezineminyaka emine ubudala, ngakho-ke kungenzeka ukuthi isikhathi lapho owokuqala kuphela eyayizokhohlwa khona ngokuphelele. Inkinga yomhawu ngeke ibe ejulile, njengeminyaka engu-5-6 yezintandokazi ezijwayelekile. Futhi inkinga yeminyaka emithathu, cishe, izohamba ngokushelela.
• Eminyakeni engu-3-5
Ukulungiselela ingane izinguquko ezenzeka emndenini, udinga ngokucophelela. Ukuze uvimbele ukucindezeleka okuvela ekuboneni "umhlaseli weklabishi," zama ukwenza ingane iqhaza ngokugcwele kulezi zenzakalo. Udinga ukulalela umbono wakhe, uvikele ukuzethemba, ukhuthaze ukuziphatha, ngaphandle kwalokho awukwazi ukugwema umhawu. Ngokwenza kanjalo, khumbula ukuthi izingane zingadlala ndawonye hhayi ngokushesha. Futhi kungcono ukuthi ungashiyi owodwa uqobo omunye nomunye ekuqaleni. Kulokhu, amathuba okulimala ingane aphakeme - hhayi ngobubi, kodwa ngokuqondisa.
• Uma uneminyaka engu-6-8
Umama udinga owokuzalwa ongaphansi kokuzalwa okusha. Ukuphila kwakhe kuyashintsha kakhulu: ukuzimela, umthwalo wemfanelo. Igama elithi "akunakwenzeka" liqala ukushintshwa ngomqondo othi "kufanele": kufanele ufunde, wenze izinqumo, uthole indawo yayo eqenjini ... Akudingi izinyanga ezimbalwa ukuvumelanisa nezimo ezintsha, njengoba abazali abaningi bacabanga, kodwa iminyaka eyi-1.5-2. Ngakho-ke, udinga ukunikeza kahle umfundi umfundi ukubukeka kwengane njengelungu elisha lomndeni. Futhi ungenzi ingane yokuqala kumzali wesibili noma umama.
Ngesikhathi sokukhulelwa
Ukuze umntwana afike esikoleni samabanga aphansi, usana olusanda kuzalwa lufana nomfokazi esiteshini se-spaceship. Isimo sakhe sengqondo kumntwana, uzokwakha ngesisekelo salokho akuzwa kwabanye. Ngakho-ke, ukwethula izingane komunye nomunye kufanele kusengaphambili.
Yini okufanele ngiyenze?
Sitshele ukuthi lo msana uzoba yini: omncane kakhulu, ongakwazi ukuhamba, uyophuza ubisi futhi akhale. Bonisa ingane izithombe zakhe zengane kanye nesithombe somntwana ku-ultrasound. Ake ngithinte noma ngilinganise isisu sami. Buza ingane lokho akukhumbulayo ngaye kusukela ebusheni. Mtshele ukuthi ubesemathunjini wakho futhi, futhi naye wadla khona (ake amthinte, njengokushaya izandla zakhe nemilenze).
Yini okufanele ngiyigweme?
1) Uma ufunde ngokukhulelwa kwakho, ungayifihli kumntwana omdala. Ungabeki izinsuku zokushicilelwa kwezindaba (emva kwe-ultrasound, ukuhlolwa kathathu, isonto, isimemezelo, ngo-Mashi 8). Ukukhathazeka kwakho, ukungaqiniseki, isifiso esinesihluku kungamethusa futhi kuphazamise ingane, futhi ukungazethembi nokungafuni ukuhlanganyela kuzokumisa kulo mcimbi.
2) Unganikezeli ingane yakho "izinhlelo zakho zezingane." Kunzima ukuba aqonde cishe noma yikuphi ubudala. Ungabuzi: "Kungani singenabantwana? Kuthiwani uma sithenga wena udade? "Khumbula indlela umyeni wakhe asabela ngayo ekufundiseni okunjalo. Ungalungiseleli ingane ukuthi yini wena ongeke uyihlele. Kubalulekile ukufundisa ingane ukuthatha. Izingane ziza ngothando uma zifuna, hhayi lapho "zihlela futhi zivuma."
3) Lindela ingane engu-2 ndawonye, kodwa hlonipha imizwa yomdala wakho. Uma enganelisekanga ngokuthi umzalwane noma udade uzovela, cela ukuthi yini engabasiza ukuba benze abangane futhi bathandane. Izindlela zalokhu zingaba mass. Phakamisa ingane ukuba ishaqe isisu sakho, ukhulume nomsundu, "landa" i-lullaby kuya disk, udwebe isithombe, wenze ifreyimu yesithombe ku-ultrasound, ihlaya, ukusiza ukuqoqa isikhalazo, ukhethe igama nokunye okuningi.
Uvelaphi lo mntwana?
Phakathi kwemibuzo eminingi enzima izingane ezibuza abantu abadala, lokhu kungenye yezinzima kakhulu. Ukufuna impendulo efanele, kunemithetho eminingana. Kubalulekile ukukhumbula ukuthi utshele ingane ngokuzalwa kwakhe. Uma ingane ineminyaka emithathu kuya kwemihlanu ubudala, indaba nge-storks kanye neklabishi zifanelekile. Kodwa uzilungiselele ukuthi ngokushesha maduzane ingane yesimanje izokwazi iqiniso, futhi ungalahlekelwa ukwethembeka. Ngakho-ke, kungcono ukutshela ukuthi kuyini, kodwa ukugwema imininingwane yemvelo. I-physiology ingaba yisizathu sokwesaba okuhlukahlukene, ingane ingavela "nezilo ezivela emathunjini". Indaba ekahle iyoba indaba yothando lwakho kanye nokulindela kwalo (balinde wena nje njengomfowethu). Naka isimo sakho siqu. Uma umama ngokwakhe ekhathazekile futhi efihle imizwa yakhe - akuyona imizwa ecacile yengane. Zama ukumchazela ukuthi ucabangani ngaso sonke isikhathi - ukukhathazeka kwakho kufanele kuhlukaniswe. Futhi unake lokho okuhumushayo ezingeni lamagama. Ingane ingakwazi ukubona umsebenzi wokubamba iqhaza empilweni yomntwana njengesivilapha kakhulu, futhi ngentshiseko enkulu. Ngubani, uma kungenjalo abazalwane nodade asebekhulile, bafundisa ngasese konke abantu abadala abakuthandayo ukuthula, noma ngisho nokubanqabela nhlobo? Fundisa ingane ukuba ibuze: "Mama, ucabanga ukuthi ngibamba umfowethu?" Noma "Uma ngimtshela ukuthi ngilwa kanjani." Buza impendulo: "Nawe?" Fundisa ingane ukugwema umklamo othi "Ngingakwazi?" Ufundisa ukungalaleli, kodwa ukuxoxisana nokuthatha omunye umthwalo wemfanelo.
Amathiphu awusizo
Ungaqhubi izingxoxo zemfundo (okungenzeka, ukuthi akunakwenzeka). Hlola izinga lamakhono azimele omdala futhi uhlanganyele ekuqiniseni kwawo: angadla, ahambe ebhodweni, alele embhedeni. Kancane kancane ukwethula imikhawulo: udinga ukudlala ngokuthula, umama akakwazi ukukuthatha ezandleni zakho (ukhathele). Kodwa ungahlobanisi imikhawulo ngokubonakala komntwana esikhathini esizayo. Funda izincwadi lapho kukhona abafowethu-odadewethu. Gxila ukunakekela ingane yokuqala ukuthi izingane zivikela futhi zivikele. Futhi bahlala "abangane ngenxa yokuphila". Thatha ingane endala indima ekulungiseleleni ukubeletha (cinga amathoyizi amasha we-diaper ndawonye). Angakhetha futhi anike umntwana wakhe ongakazalwa izingubo zakhe ezincane. Ngisho nangesikhathi ukhulelwe, fundisa ingane ukuthi ichithe isikhathi esithile nabanye abantu abadala. Ngenxa yalezi zinhloso, mema ugogo noma unina kusengaphambili. Amalungu omndeni ahlukene azosakaza imizwa emihle ngokubonakala kwemvuthu, futhi afaka ingane yokuqala kule "mdlalo".
Taboo ngamazwi angenangqondo:
1) Futhi asitholi ... (ingane ayikwazi ukunquma lokhu).
2) Sizokuthenga umfowethu ... (umzalwane akuyona ithoyizi).
3) Uma uziphatha kabi - ake sibuyele esibhedlela ... (ungahambisani nemizwa yengane).
4) Kulungile, konke, manje usuvele ungumdala ... (ingane efanayo nangaphambili).
5) Akufanele neze uphelelwe udade omncane, uzoba mncane kakhulu ... (ungafaki ingane yakho ukwesaba).
6) Sisazokuthanda ... (ungabangeli umhawu).
Imishwana efanelekayo:
1) Ngokushesha umfowenu wangempela uzovela (hhayi umzala, kodwa okufanayo, okuyingqayizivele).
2) Futhi angingenalo udadewethu ebuntwaneni bami ... (akekho ozokuvikela, akekho ozodlala naye ...).
3) Siyakuthanda njalo, singumndeni wakho (qinisekisa ukuthi kuyohlale njalo).
4) Ngesikhathi usiswini lami, ubungaphezulu (nikeza umuzwa wokuphakama).
5) Shayela umntwana "ingane yethu" (gcizelela ukubandakanyeka komndeni wonke).
Ukubeletha kanye nomhlangano wokuqala
• Izakhamuzi eziningi zengqondo zeluleka umama ngesikhathi sokukhulelwa ekhaya lokubeletha, ukuze ingane ibelethe umbelethisi noma umyeni wakhe ukuba amukele umntwana osekhulile futhi amtshele ukuthi uyathokozisa kanjani ukumbona.
• Yethula izingane phakathi komunye nomunye: "Le ngane, bheka izinyathelo zakhe ezincane-amehlo." Vumela futhi uthinte. Ungabonisi ukwesaba okwesaba (futhi ngokuzumayo uyiguqule?) Futhi, ngokuphambene, ungayishintshi ingane ibe idonsa.
• Ifoto izingane ndawonye esibhedlela, ake umdala akunike izimbali. Chaza ukuthi uneliholide mayelana nokuvela kwelungu elisha lomndeni, futhi impilo yakho iyoba mnandi nangokwengeziwe. Yilalela ukusabela kwengane kokuqala kokumangalela: ukukhala kwengane, umzabalazo wendawo eduze komama wakhe. Buza, mhlawumbe ingane ivuse umdala, futhi ufuna ukulala kwelinye igumbi. Zonke izingane ezincane ziyi-conservatives, ukuzinza emndenini kubalulekile kubo, futhi into entsha ihlale ibonakala njengokucindezeleka. Ngakho-ke, uma umeme izimenywa ukuba uhalalisele usana olusanda kuzalwa, bacele ukuba balethe isipho esincane kubantwana bokuqala. Noma yenza lezi zipho ngokwakho.
Izinkinga ezingenzeka kumama
Uma, naphezu kwazo zonke izinyathelo zokuqapha nokukhuthaza, uqaphele ukuthi abadala bakho banomhawu - bajabule. Lokhu kusho ukuthi umfanisi wansuku zonke lapho izingane zifunda ukuxazulula izingxabano, thola ukuyekethisa, ukwabelana nokwenza izinqumo, ukuze lo msebenzi ungabi ukucindezeleka kwansuku zonke futhi ungaphenduki ikhaya lakho elimnandi esihogweni, ugcine umbuso olula. Ungesabi nganoma yisiphi isizathu futhi ufunde ukubona ukuthi yini, hhayi lokho okumesabayo. Kuwe ukuba ube nokukhathazeka ukuthi omncinyane ngeke nakanjani anele ngokwanele uthando lwakho, futhi umdala ngeke akhule ukuba abe ogoist. Funda ukubuza. Ezimpendulo zemibuzo elula "yini oyikwesabayo," "kungani ulaka manje," ikhambi lezinkinga ezinkulu lifihliwe. Yiba njalo. Uma kukhona okungenakwenzeka, ngeke kube njalo, hhayi ukuthi "uma uthanda ngempela, khona-ke ungakwazi." Ungalindeli imiphumela esheshayo. Dumisani imiphumela futhi masenze iphutha. Uma uthumela izingane ukuhamba, khumbula ukuthi bobabili nihamba, futhi akekho ohamba ngomunye. Kuzoba nesikhathi esanele ngaphambi kokuba umdala angakunika usizo olwanele. Khumbula ukuthi imizwa emisha yengane ngokuphathelene nayo yonke into entsha isivamile. Uyavuma ukuthi angeke athande i-beetroot, i-sandalaki noma u-Aunt Masha. Kodwa kukhona futhi "okuphambene" okusobala.
Izinkinga ezingenzeka ezinganeni yokuqala:
- ubuyele esikhathini sangaphambili sokuthuthukiswa (ingane iqala ukulalela, ilwa ingono, inqaba ukulala embhedeni wakhe, ayifuni ukucela ukuya endlini yangasese);
- ukuhlukumezeka kubantwana abancane nabazali;
- abakhohlisi, ukwenqaba isimo, izinsongo zokushiya indlu;
- iziphakamiso eziphikelela "ukubuyisela umntwana", anike, anike;
- ukuheha abazali (ukugula, ukuziphatha okubi, ukusebenza okungekho emfundweni, ama-antics amahle, amanga, amafantasi).
Yini okufanele ngiyenze?
Umntwana omdala akudingeki akhule nomncane. Ungumntwana onjalo. Uma usho ukuthi "usekhulile futhi kumele", ngokucacile lo mbhikisho uzoba. Khuthaza "ukuziphatha okungenazinkinga" lapho ingane ingaguli, iziphatha kahle, iyasebenza. Thola isikhathi namagama ukuwahlola. Khuphuka ngemikhuba emisha; "Ngiyaqonda ukuthi manje sengikhulisile ukukhathazeka kwami, kodwa ngingathanda ukwenza okuthile ndawonye njalo kusihlwa / ekuseni / ngoLwesibili. Ucabanga ukuthi kungaba (ukupheka kwasekuseni ubaba, hamba i-yoga, ulalele i-karaoke, ugibele embhedeni, uthuthuke, udlale umdlalo wekhompiyutha ...)? "Chaza ukuthi udinga ukusekelwa kwakhe, usize ekuqaphele ukubaluleka, ukubaluleka kwalo usizo kumama. Ifomu yalesi siza kumele akhethe yena. Phakamisa izinketho bese ufika nesenzo, uhlanganyele kulokho okwenzekayo. Khetha ezintweni ozithandayo ezigcizelela ukuzimela kwengane. Noma yimiphi imidlalo ihle: "ulethe imithwalo, yenza isidleke." Kodwa lapha, futhi kungenzeka kube izicelo ezimbi kakhulu: "Qoqa isikhwama, lungisa izingubo zakho," "Ngicela unginike i-napkin noma i-napkin." Qinisekisa ukuthi uqhubeka nokuqamba, ukumbamba izibulo, ukushaya ikhanda. Ukuxhumana okuthintayo yilophawu oluphawulekayo lapho ingane engekho ngomlomo inquma khona indawo yakho kuye. Gcina imizuzu yokukhulumisana nomntwana: qhubeka ufunda izindaba zebusuku bese upha amajuba ekuseni. Ukunakekelwa okungaphezulu ngemuva kokuzalwa kwengane kufanele kunikezwe ingane ekhulile. Zama ukubandakanya kuwo wonke amacala angadingi ukuba khona kwakho okubandakanya umyeni wakho, ugogo nomkhulu. Isikhathi samahhala, unikezele izibulo. Buza: "Ungathanda ukuthini?" Noma ngabe yikuphi, ungathumeli umkhulu kumama, ugogo noma izinsuku ezinhlanu, ukuze angamlimazi. Akukho lutho olubuhlungu kanje. Phila ubunzima ndawonye. Hlala nokho nonina.