Khumbula indaba yePikling mayelana nendlovu ehlakaniphile? Wahlukumeza izihlobo eziningi - nentshe, ne-hegemonic, nabo bonke abanye - ngemibuzo yakhe engapheli ukuthi baqhubeka bemvuza ngemikhumbi. Kodwa lokhu akusilo ukuphela: indlovu ehlasiwe kodwa engaphephile iya eya ingwenya - ukuthola ukuthi yayidla ngani isimangaliso. Yakwazi ukungabi nalesi sidlo, futhi kusukela enkumbulweni yempi ngedokodo isishiywe esitokisini esixotshiwe ... Abazali abaningi, ngicabanga , bazibamba ngesifiso esingenakunqotshwa sokuthi bavake ngandlela-thile "izindebe" zabo. Kodwa singabantu abangaphezu kwezihlakaniphi zezingqayizivele ze-Kipling. Asisebenzisi izijeziso zomzimba ku "izigebengu", ngisho noma zisigcwalisa ngamakhulu emibuto kusukela ekuseni kuze kube sebusuku, phakathi kwazo okuyinto engakhululekile, okuyinto ezophazamisa noma ubani ...
Izinkulungwane eziyikhulu "Kungani?"
Into eyinhloko - phefumula ngokujulile, ungakhathazeki futhi uthathe kalula ukuthi ingane yakho ngale ndlela ayiyona into ehlukile. Ivele ikhule iminyaka yobuhle futhi engakhohlwa - "yobudala bokuthi kungani". Eminyakeni engu-3-5, imibuzo ehlukahlukene, kuhlanganise nalabo abanobuqili, idlulisela kuwo wonke umuntu, njengesikhwama esivulekile, futhi lokhu kuyimvelo. Kunabantwana abakulesi sikhathi bacela imibuzo engu-400-500 ngosuku. Akumangalisi ukuthi kulokhu kugeleza okuphazamisayo kukhona "okungakhululekile". Izingane zafika ezweni lapho zingaqondakali khona, futhi ngubani, ngaphandle kwakho, ozochaza ukuthi konke kuhlelwe kanjani lapha? Ukubuza imibuzo, ingane igxila ekudaleni isithombe sayo somhlaba. Kulokho akukho okubalulekile nokwesibini - kuyakhathaza konke. Ngaphezu kwalokho, ukwanda kwelukuluku nokuzifunela ezinganeni, isifiso sokunamathela ngekhala lakho yonke indawo kungaba esinye sezibonakaliso zobuciko bokudala. Ngakho-ke kuhle kakhulu uma ingane ibuza imibuzo; Kubi uma engakwenzi. Ngakho-ke, ingane enokubambezeleka ekuthuthukiseni kwengqondo iphuzile futhi inemibuzo "Kungani?". Lapha kulokhu kubalulekile ukuqonda ngokujulile izizathu ngisho, mhlawumbe, ngosizo lesazi sengqondo noma udokotela. Ngakho-ke, ungalokothi ukhumbule i-pochemchku yakho, ngisho noma ukuthanda kwakhe ulwazi kubonakala kuwe ngokweqile, futhi imibuzo - engalungile. Futhi-ke, ungabahleki - ngoba ukuhleka kwakho kungakudlulisela isifiso sokubuza noma yimiphi imibuzo evela kuye. Kunoma yikuphi, wena. Cabanga, ngoba asimangazi futhi sithinteka ngisho nemibuto yezingane efana nalokhu: "Kungani kuvula?", "Kungani ngingaba ngamakamela?" Noma "Kungani ngihamba ngezikhumba kanye nekati - ngingaboshiwe?". Le mibuzo kanye neminye imibuzo eminingi yezingane ngokuvamile iphendula ngokuthula nangokuningiliziwe, ngaphandle kokufihla noma yini. Kodwa inyane liyisidalwa esingenacala futhi esilula. Kuye, azikho izihloko ezamukelekile emphakathini omdala. Ngakho-ke, akufanele sihlukanise izimpikiswano ezivela kuwo, sizenzele ngokuvumelana nemibono yethu: lo mbuzo ungaphendulwa, kodwa lokhu ngeke kwenzeke, kusenesikhathi noma ngokujwayelekile - luhlobo luni lokungabi nalutho? Khumbula: ayikho imibuzo engalungile noma yezingane eziyiziphukuphuku, kukhona ukuziphatha okungahambi kahle noma okungenangqondo kubo abadala.
- Nazi izimpendulo ezingaphumelelanga kakhulu kumbuzo enjalo wengane.
"Awunamahloni ukubuza into enjalo!"
Ukuveza ukungajabuli nokuthukuthela kwakho, uyayiphinde ingane futhi imphoqe ukuba afune izimpendulo ezivela kwabanye abantu. Ngaphezu kwalokho, akufanele neze azizwe enecala ngokuthi ucele lokhu noma lowo mbuzo. Akenzanga ngenhloso, hhayi ukukucasula, ukushayela upende. Uvele nje ebuza, ngoba wayenesithakazelo, futhi yikho konke. "Futhi manje uSeryozha uzobuya ekhaya adle i-cottage shizi ..." Umqondo wokushintsha okuthile akuyona into entsha, lena yindlela yamasiko yokuxhaphaza, eyaziwa kakhulu kwengqondo. Kwezinye izimo lokhu kungasebenza, kodwa okwesikhashana. Uzobona - kungekudala ingane izoqhubeka ibuza lokhu noma umbuzo ofanayo "ongenakukhathazeka" noma kunjalo. Noma uyaqaphela ukuthi awuwuthandi umbuzo, ukuthi wakhipha into engalungile, futhi kungani - kungacacile, futhi uzozizwa enecala ngaphandle kwecala. Kuvela ukuthi "ukuhumusha kwemicibisholo" enjalo akuyona inketho. Ingane idinga ulwazi, futhi iyokwenza yonke imizamo yokuyithola.
"Uzokhula - uzokwazi!" Cha, ukuzwa impendulo enjalo, ingane ngeke ilinde, lapho ikhula khona. Ngemuva kwalokho, imibuzo yezingane ezincane zihlale ziyingqikithi. Ingane idinga ulwazi masinyane, futhi ifunda yonke into ngokushesha kakhulu, kuphela hhayi kuwe, kodwa kusuka kuma-comrades ahamba phambili. Futhi lokho abamtshela khona, ngamaphi amagama, wena kanye nephupho elibi ngeke uphuphe. Kuyo yonke indawo ukuphila kwamathumba, futhi kuyo yonke indawo kukhona ochwepheshe bakhe abasha - nasenkulisa, nasegcekeni, ngisho nase-sandbox. Ngakho kungcono ukuthatha lo msebenzi kuwe. "Cela umama wakho (ubaba, ugogo, umkhulu)." Uma usho lokhu, umane ugijimise ingane. Khombisa ukunganaki futhi, ngaphezu kwalokho, ukungabi namandla. Igunya lakho elikhulu liyancibilikisa phambi kwamehlo akho. Cha, njengoba umbuzo uqondiswe kuwe, wena kuphela kufanele uphendule.
Imibuzo eminye ingaphendulwa ngokukhululekile, ngokulinganisela okukhulu, kodwa isengatholakali emibonweni yezingane. Njengokuthi ukhuluma nomuntu omdala, kulula kakhulu. Enye indlela yokuphendula imibuzo enjalo yisiphakamiso sokuphikisa "ukucabanga ndawonye." Lokhu kuyisimo esihle kakhulu sezombusazwe - buza ingane ukuthi ucabangani ngakho. Ngokuqinisekile unenguqulo yakhe - lapha futhi uxoxe ngakho. Mhlawumbe ingane izosho okuthile okuzwakalayo futhi iseduze neqiniso. Kodwa ngisho noma imibono yakhe ingeyona iqiniso, uzomnika ithuba lokungakutholi nje kuphela, kodwa ukuba ube ngu-interlocutor wakho, ucabangisise, futhi lokhu kuyisifundo esiwusizo kakhulu. Isikhathi semibuzo engapheli, kuhlanganise "engakhululekile", siyohamba ngokushesha kakhulu. Futhi wena - ngokusho komkhuba owuthola - impilo yakho yonke izobheka izimpendulo zemibuzo ebalulekile yengane yakho esekhulile, nakuba sekuyisikhathi eside eyeka ukubabuza.
Mayelana nalo
Kukhona umbuzo owodwa "ongathinteki" ozobuza bonke abazali babo. Umbuzo wukuthi bavelaphi. Indlela ephawulekayo kakhulu eyenziwe yintombazane eyodwa, indodakazi yama-philologists ajwayelekile: "Mama, bashicilela kanjani izingane?" Futhi le Sonja oneminyaka emihlanu kanye nezinye izingane zanamuhla zedolobhana ziyobe zingavamile ukuveza inguqulo ye-iklabishi, isorkork noma esitolo. Kungenzeka ukuthi abazange babone izigodlo, iklabishi ibonakala kuphela esitolo, futhi yiziphi izitolo ezikhona kahle zizwakala kahle. Ngakho lezi zindlela azikho ndawo ezifanelekile. Impendulo ethandwa kakhulu emphakathini kulo mbuzo ihlala inkulumo ethi: "Izingane zivela emzimbeni kamama," kodwa ingane yanamuhla ayikho ukuze kuthume ngalokhu. Kungenzeka ukuthi uzocela okunye. Futhi-ke akukho zikhombandlela. Kusobala ukuthi onomntwana oneminyaka emithathu kule ndaba udinga ukukhuluma ngendlela ehlukile kunomntwana oneminyaka emihlanu ubudala, nentombazane - ngokuhlukile kunomfana. Kubalulekile ukuphendula lo mbuzo ngendlela yokuthi ulwazi olwamukelwe aluyethusa nge-natureism ngokweqile, kodwa ukuthula lapha akudingekile: kulokhu ingane izozwa ukuthi abazali bahlala okuthile okuyihlazo kuye, futhi lokhu nakho kungabhekana nokuhlukunyezwa kwengqondo .
Ukucabanga Ngokubambisana
Ngelinye igama, lapha njengomdlalo - "Yebo no cha bangasho ukuthi abamnyama nabamhlophe bangathathi". Ungaboni, ungaqambi, futhi ungathukutheli. Konke okunye kuphezu kwakho. Azikho amathiphu jikelele lapha, zonke izingane zihlukile, futhi kuningi kuxhomeke ekufundeni kwabazali bakho, okuzokuvumela ukuba uthole amagama afanele nezwi eliqondile engxoxweni nosana, hhayi ukulungiswa kunoma yimiphi imikhuba. Into esemqoka - ukunikeza izimpendulo ezindabeni ezibucayi, cabangela izinga lokuthuthukiswa kwengane. Lokho engakuqondiyo namanje kungase kuphephe ukudlula kwakhe. Ngaphezu kwalokho, khumbula: noma yiluphi ulwazi, kuhlanganise nalowo umntwana oluthola kuwe, aluqukethe amaqiniso kuphela, kodwa nokuhlola kwabo. Futhi kulokhu, ukuhlola kwakho kubalulekile, nguye ozokwakha isimo sengqondo somntwana "kwizifundo ezisheshayo" ezingxoxweni. Kulula nje, akukhathaleki ukuthi yiliphi igama umalume elikushoyo esitolo, kubalulekile ukuthi leli gama alilungile. Futhi omunye umalume ukhuluphele, ngoba uyagula, usevele ekhuni kakhulu, ngakho masihawukele, futhi angeke sikhombise umunwe kuye.