Noma kunjalo, izimo ezinjalo zokuziphatha zifaneleka kakhulu eYurophu noma eMelika. ERussia, ngokuvamile abantu abashadile bayaqhubeka bezondana ngobuqotho. Ukuziphindiselela kwesifazane kuyesabekayo, kodwa ngokuvamile kuvamile futhi akulimazi neze. Kodwa inzondo yamadoda ngemva kwehlukaniso ingaba nemiphumela emibi kakhulu.
Iyini inzondo yakhe emva kwehlukaniso? ERussia, akakwazi ukusho noma yini umuntu siqu. Ngakho-ke kuyisiko kithi: ukuhlukana nezitha, ukuphazamisa izinzwa zomuntu ngamunye isigamu sokuphila noma impilo yonke, ukuxabana nabangane nezihlobo eziqhakambisa ukuxhumana nabangaphambili, futhi kwezinye izimo ziphindiselele.
Ukuhluleka ukuqedela ubuhlobo nesithunzi, ukuphuma kuzo ngaphandle kokucindezela kanye nezinkinga eziqhubekayo, kuvamile. Yiqiniso, ngaphandle kwamasiko avamile, ngemuva kokuziphatha okunjalo kungaba izici zomuntu siqu. Ngokuvamile indoda iyamzonda umfazi wayo wangaphambili ngoba kunezinye ezingenakuxazululwa, izinkinga ezingaxazululwa. Futhi ngezinye izikhathi inzondo yakhe iyisibonakaliso semizwa yakhe engakaqali. Ngendlela, okungafani nakho kungaba yiqiniso: ngezinye izikhathi indoda isivele ikhulile kumkayo, futhi yathola ngisho nokuthanda okusha. Futhi umkakhe wangaphambili wayeqhubeka elinde, ethemba futhi akholwe. Uma naye embiza noma ebhala imiyalezo ye-SMS ngenkathi eqhubeka exoxisana nabangani bakhe, ivele ivuselele imizwa yakhe emibi kumuntu wangaphambili.
Kunemibono ehlukene mayelana nendlela inqubo yesehlukaniso eyenzeka ngayo. Ezinye izazi zengqondo zithi isinqumo kufanele senziwe ukwenza isinqumo mayelana nesahlukaniso. Lokhu kungaba yisenzakalo esibucayi empilweni yomndeni. Isibonelo, ukukhashelwa noma ukufa kwengane. Futhi ukuzalwa kwengane ngezinye izikhathi kuba umthombo wezingxabano ezingapheli phakathi kwabashade. Ezinye izazi zengqondo - iqembu eliningi - liqinisekile ukuthi akukho mcimbi owedlulele ekuphileni kwalabo abashadile abakwazi ukubhubhisa ubuhlobo babo njengaleyo. Lokhu kuhlale kulandelwa ukuhlanganiswa okuthile kwezimo ezingathandeki, okulungiselela umndeni ukuba uwele phansi ekuhluphekeni kokuqala okuhlangene nakho.
Uma uhlukanisile kumlingani wakho futhi ufuna ukuqonda lokho inzondo yakhe kusho ngemuva kokuhlukanisa, kufanele uqale uqonde izigaba zenqubo yokuhlukaniswa kobudlelwane. Kwenzeka ukuthi abashadile abahambisani nokubona kwabo ubuhlobo, bese omunye wabo esevuthiwe futhi ulungele ukuhamba, kanti omunye usekholelwa esikhathini esizayo. Yiqiniso, kulesi simo, bobabili banenkinga enkulu.
Isimo sithuthukiswa enye iqiniso elingathandeki. Ngokuvamile abantu, beshiya umndeni, benze lokhu kuphela ukuze baphikise umfazi onokukhubazeka okungenzeka. Bayahamba futhi babuyele izikhathi eziningana baze benze isinqumo sokugcina. Umfazi, ngesikhathi sesinqumo, njengomthetho, usuzinikezele ngokuziphatha futhi ulungele ukuhlala wedwa. Ngakho emva kokuhlukanisa, akasenayo imizwelo ebukhali kanye namandla enzondo. Uma isahlukaniso senzeke ngesinyathelo somfazi, ngokuvamile kuvele kungazelelwe, sekugcineni futhi kungenakwenzeka. Abesifazane bavame ukuqoqa futhi bagcine ngaphakathi okungalungile, futhi uma benquma ukuhamba, bakwenza kanye nhlobo. Abesifazane abakwazi ukugijimela phakathi kwezindlu ezahlukene, futhi ngokungajwayelekile, uma behamba "baya kumama wabo," bakwenza lokhu kuze kube phakade. Yilokho izibalo ukuthi uma owesifazane enquma ukushiya umndeni, ukuwubuyisela kunzima kakhulu kunomuntu.
Uma singeza lapha ukubukeka kwesinqumo, khona-ke singaqonda izinga lokukhungatheka kwalowo myeni oshiyiwe. Ukukhungatheka yilokho okuvame ukubizwa ngokuthi "ukuhlukana" enkulumweni ejwayelekile, kungukuvimba kwezinto ezibalulekile zokuphila ezenzelwa ukuthanda komuntu. Futhi kaningi angeke akwazi ukuthonya lezi zigcawu. Ngakho ukukhungatheka kuyinhlobo "yokungena" okungenakonakala, okwenza kube nokuhlukunyezwa kobudlova. Futhi ukuhlukumezeka kungabonakalisa ngezindlela ezahlukene - ngendlela yenzondo, ukuphindiselela, ukuhlukumeza kanye nokuhlaselwa, ngisho nangendlela yokuhlaselwa.
Ukuze sigweme izinkinga ezinenzondo zamadoda ngemva kwesahlukaniso, kufanele sizame ukukhuluma ngokugcwele ngangokunokwenzeka kwazo zonke izinkinga eziholele kulo. Vumela lezi zingxoxo zigcwale ubuhlungu nemicabango emibi, kodwa kungcono ukukhuluma kunokushiya ngokuphazamiseka. Ngisho noma ngabe sekudlule isikhathi esithile ngemuva kokuthola amaphepha okuhlukanisa, futhi unomuzwa wokuthi umyeni wangaphambili uqhubeka ekubhebhethekisa imizwa ebuhlungu, akusikhathi sekwephuzile ukuhlala etafuleni lokuxoxisana. Into esemqoka - ungamsoli ngokungakhethi. Kunoma yikuphi ukungqubuzana, izinhlangothi zombili zisola - lo mthetho obalulekile uzokusiza ukuba ungamcasuli umuntu ize. Uma ungakasondelene noma uthole ulimi oluvamile, lokhu akusho ukuthi omunye wenu awunathemba. Ngakho-ke, ukukhuluma naye kungukuthi umuntu uzizwa kanjani futhi ucabange ngombono wakhe, futhi angazami ukwethula izimangalo zakhe njengobufakazi bokungabi nalutho.