Ngenkathi kukhona amadoda nabesifazane, imibuzo mayelana nokuhlukumezeka ngeke iphele ukuba ifaneleke. Futhi ukuqonda izizathu, ukuthola umlandu wokungathengi, bobabili abashadile bafuna, kungakhathaliseki ukuthi ubani oguqukile. Amaphesenti amakhulu abesifazane abakholelwa ukuthi ayikho imindeni lapho kungekho zinguquko, futhi uma zingekho manje, zizohamba kamuva, ezomunye wezinkinga zempilo yomndeni noma inkinga yamadoda asekhulile. Izinkinga zeminyaka yobudala bomndeni - isihloko sendaba yethu yanamuhla.
Kukhona okungenani izinkinga ezintathu zomndeni, lapho ngokuvamile kuvame ukuhlaselwa khona.
Owokuqala - ngonyaka wesithathu wokuphila komndeni, futhi, ngokuyisisekelo, lesi sizathu sokufuna ukuqinisekisa ukuthi "Ingabe kukhona uthando?". Iqiniso liwukuthi emva kweminyaka emibili, lapho imizwa ibonakale, isiphepho futhi iyathakazelisa, isikhathi sokuqala ubuhlobo obubushelelezi nokuthula buqala. Kodwa abashadile bahlale befuna ukukholelwa ukuthi uthando lokuphila luzohlala lujabulisa kakhulu, njengonyaka wokuqala wokuphila okuhlanganyelwe, ngisho nangaphambi komshado. Ngokuphambene nezifiso zethu, imizwa iya esiteji esisha, eqinise kakhulu futhi enesihe ngaphezu kokuqala kobudlelwano, kodwa ukuqonda nokwamukela lokhu umbhangqwana kaningi awunamandla. Lesi yisizathu sokuqala sokuphinga kwangaphambili, kukhona nesifiso sokuphinde uzwe isiphepho semizwelo ngaphambili. Phakathi nalesi sikhathi, amadoda angase ashintshe, ngoba owesifazane akanaso isikhathi sokucabanga ngakho, ikakhulu uma ingane ivele ibonakale, futhi akunakwenzeka ukuthola isikhathi sokuthola umthandi noma imihlangano. Ungakhohlwa ukuthi ngalesi sikhathi abesifazane bahlushwa ukucindezeleka, ngakho-ke bangase bangabonakali kahle njengakuqala, futhi kuphela indoda engamsiza ukuba ayiqede. Kodwa amadoda angobuthakathaka ngokwemvelo, kuze kube yilapho ekhaya nezingane zikhathazeka khona, ngakho-ke bayashesha ngokushesha ekufuneni izinto ezintsha.
Izindaba zokungathembeki komuntu oshade naye ngowesifazane ziba namandla kakhulu, futhi akunakwenzeka ukubonelela ngokuziphatha kwakhe. Ngisho nabesifazane abanokulinganisela nabokuzola bangakwazi ukuzenza kungabonakali. Ayikho incazelo, idinga ukuthula nokuthula ngeke kusize umfazi onomhawu, kodwa owesifazane onengqondo uzothola amanye amathiphu okubhekana nale nkinga.
Ukukhashelwa komyeni wakhe kwenza owesifazane ohlakaniphile ucabange ngezizathu futhi azibheke yena, kunokuba aphonse amaphoyinti futhi afake isicelo sokuhlukanisa. Akukwenzeki emva kwakho konke, ngakho-ke kuphela ukuthi uhlangothi olulodwa lunecala. Ngendlela, izazi zengqondo azicebisi uma uvula ukukhwabanisa ukuqala "inkulumo yenhliziyo enhliziyweni" futhi uveze umlingani ongathembeki, kungcono ukunikeza indlu konke okudingayo ohlangothini. Ukucabanga, owesifazane uzokwazi ukuqonda njalo othandekayo, ngisho noma engumuntu ongathembekile. Yini ongayenza uma amadoda eminyaka engakwazi ukuthola ukuqinisekiswa, futhi bakholelwa emandleni abo ngaphandle kosizo lwesifazane. Futhi uma owesifazane onjalo ehluleka ukuzinaka yena kanye naye, ukusho amazwi othandekayo, njengakuqala, lokho umuntu okufanele akwenze, uma engazi ezinye izindlela zokuthola okufunwa ngaphandle komthandi. Uma uthola ukuhlukumezeka, yenza sengathi akukho lutho olwenzekile, umnakekele, umthande futhi ubone umphumela, ubuhlobo nenkosikazi yakhe buzophela. Ngikholelwa, cishe wonke amanoveli, ngisho nangesikhathi eside futhi esibi, ekupheleni kwesikhathi noma kamuva, akubona bonke abantu abafuna ukushintsha izimpilo zabo futhi baqale futhi. Ekhaya, ngemva kwakho konke, kunomfazi othandekayo futhi othandekayo ngempela. Uyakungabaza ukuthi indoda ingamthanda umkayo futhi ishintshe? Ngakho-ke, uphutha kakhulu, lokhu kungenzeka ngempela.
Njengoba unqobile zonke izinkinga zenkinga yokuqala, ungakhohlwa ngalokho okulandelayo futhi uzilungiselele ngokuziphatha.
Inkinga yesibili ifika eminyakeni engama-7 yokuphila komndeni, okufana kakhulu neyokuqala, ngakho-ke kungenzeka ukuba unqobe abashadile "abaqinile".
Inkinga eyingozi kunazo zonke iwela ngonyaka wama-20 womndeni. Ukuhlolwa kwamandla obuhlobo buvela emaceleni amabili. Indoda ifinyelela eminyakeni engama-40, futhi yena ubhekene nobunzima obuphakathi kweminyaka emibili, ukuhlola kabusha izindinganiso nokufuna incazelo empilweni kumcindezela ukuba azame ukushintsha umlingani wakhe, noma kunjalo ahlale emndenini. Ngokufanayo, owesifazane ucabanga ngokuphila kwakhe, izingane zikhula futhi ziphile, kubonakala sengathi ungazinakekela futhi wenze amaphupho akho afezeke, kodwa lo mbhangqwana uqonde ukuthi usephuzile kakhulu. Abesifazane babukeka esibukweni bese bephelelwa ithemba ngemibimbi. Amadoda azwa ngenxa yezinwele ezincane kanye nesisu esisodwa. Wonke umuntu ufuna ukuzibonakalisa yena ngokwakhe futhi wonke umuntu ukuthi akusilo lonke elahlekile futhi uthola. Ngokuvamile kakhulu, isehlukaniso iba umphumela wenkinga enjalo, kodwa ngokuvamile kwenzeka ukuthi abashadile baqale ukuphila kwabo konke ukuphila endlini efanayo.
Ehluleka ukuthethelela intukuthelo nokukhwabanisa, abashadile bangakwazi futhi bahlakaze, bashiye izingane ngaphandle kobaba, baphile ngaphandle kokusekelwa yindoda yakhe kuze kube sekupheleni kwezinsuku zokukhala ebusuku bese belala embhedeni onesizungu. Ngemuva kwalokho, amadoda ashesha kakhulu ekushadweni, ayenayo yonke isinyathelo sokuhlangana nabesifazane, kodwa abafazi bangaphambili bakunzima ukuthola umyeni wesibili. Ikhono lokuthethelela alibhubhisi uthando, umndeni ungajabula, njengangaphambili, bekuyoba nesifiso.
Njengoba unqobile konke ukulingwa, izinkinga zempilo yomndeni, njengoba uthethelele ukukhashelwa kwabashadile, uzoba nomndeni oqinile, inhlonipho komunye nomunye nothando, uthando oluhlolwe isikhathi.