Ngokuvamile, kungumzuzu lapho umfazi elahlekelwe isithakazelo esithandana naye, amafu amnyama aqoqa impilo yomndeni. Lokhu, ngokwakho, kungabangela ngokungahambisani ukuwa komshado wakho. Yiqiniso, awukwazi ukusho ukuthi uyeke ngokuphelele ukuthanda umyeni wakho. Usayithanda, hlonipha, uzizwa umkhuba. Kodwa, ukuyiqonda njengendoda yobuhlobo bobulili, usuqalile ngokuphelele. Ukuphila, impilo, impilo ende ngaphansi kwephahla olulodwa, ukuzithokozisa ngokobulili - konke kuphazamisa ukushayela ngokocansi futhi ngenxa yalokho, wena nje, ezingeni elingenakuqondisisa, qinisa ukuba ulale naye. Ngaphambi kokuba kube khona kuwe cishe isithombe nesimo somuntu wangempela. Futhi konke kwashintsha ngendlela ephawulekayo futhi engaqondakali. Yiqiniso, ukuphakama kwayo yonke imizwa emihle, ayikwazi ukuhlala isikhathi eside futhi kuyo yonke imindeni yesibili, ngokushesha noma ngokuhamba kwesikhathi, kunenkinga enjalo. Ukuhlambalaza nokumanga akukwenzeli injabulo, kodwa ngokuphambene nalokho, kubangela ukucasuka, kanye nokusebenza komshado, manje kuyisibopho, ibhizinisi elinzima futhi elibophayo. Lokhu, okuyiqiniso, kukukhinyabeza empilweni yokuphila, futhi kuholela ekuxabaneni njalo ngenxa yokucasula kwakho. Ngakho uphuma kanjani kule nkinga ebucayi futhi uziqonde ukuthi yini okufanele uyenze uma umyeni eba umkami ayithakazelisi njengendoda? Ake sizame kancane ngalokhu.
Okokuqala, udinga ukuziqonda wena. Uma ushiye ngempela ukuba nesithakazelo kumlingani wakho womshado, njengoba umlingani wezocansi kusho, konke okungezansi kubhalwe ngokuqondile ngawe. Lapho, wena, wedwa, uvele ube nesithukuthezi komunye nomunye. Ukuze ube yedwa oziqhenyayo, ngoba wena ujabulise kakhulu kunokwakhe. Uye wammisa ngezingubo ezinhle, izinwele, izimonyo ngisho nangaphezulu, izingubo zangaphansi ezibucayi. Ngaphezu kwalokho, waphawula ukuthi kwaba nomhawu kakhulu kwabanye besifazane. Ngesicelo sakhe sokulala ocansini, unezizathu eziningi nezizathu zokuba ungazenzi. Yebo, uma kwenzeka phakathi kwakho, ulinde "isiphetho" ngokushesha. Futhi, phakathi nenqubo uqobo, awunamatheli nakancane ngokuqabisana nokucindezela. Futhi-ke siyanezela ukuthi zonke izinto zangaphambi kokuqala, awunayo nje into ecasulayo. Ngenxa yalokhu, awukwazi ukuphumula futhi ujabule, futhi, ekhanda lakho, umcabango uhlale ukhuluma: "Kungani namuhla uvumelana nokulala naye?". Ngokuqondile, ubuhlobo bobulili bube yinto yakho, njengokuthile okude nokungahambi kahle, okungukuthi, okungathandeki ngokuphelele futhi okungadingekile. Into ebaluleke kakhulu ukuthi uqale ucabange ukuthi ulahlekelwa okuthile okubalulekile empilweni, uzizwa uchithekile futhi ungenelisekile ngokobulili. Uqale ukulalela abangaphandle. Ukuzama ukuthola kuzo, ukuthi yini oyitholayo ekuphileni. Lapha, ngisho nangaphambi kokuhlukunyezwa akude kakhulu. Nakuba uzothola ngokungathengi, ukwaneliseka ngokocansi kuphela, nezwe lakho langaphakathi, lizohlala likhohliwe ngokuphelele futhi libhubhise ngokufanayo. Phela, umuzwa wecala ungaphezulu kakhulu kunokunganeliseki kwakho. Yebo, futhi ushintshe kusuka kulokhu, kancane. Futhi, ngenxa yalokho, uqhubeka ukholelwa ukuthi kufanele uhlale ndawonye. Lona ukuphikisana okuyinhloko kokuphila, okuthiwa umfazi ongatholakali. Futhi uma uhlala ngaleyo ndlela, khona-ke kufanele nakanjani ushintshe lokhu. Akudingekile, uthemba ukuthi umyeni ngokwakhe uzoqagela ngalokhu futhi azame ukushintsha okuthile. Noma nje ukhulume nawe.
Yiqiniso, ukungabi nalutho lokuphila okuphelele, kubhubhisa kakhulu isimo sengqondo kwanoma yimuphi owesifazane. Kalula nje, uma uqhubeka ubekezelela, uzobe ushukunyiswa futhi ukhathazekile ngokwengeziwe. Ngokuqinisekile konke kuzokwenza kuwe. Oshade naye uzomane egcwale ukuhlambalaza nokuhlambalaza okuvela eceleni kwakho. Futhi njengomphumela odabukisayo, lokhu kungaholela ekuphuleni ebuhlotsheni bakho.
Egameni lokugwema konke, okokuqala, cabanga ngawe. Wena, eqinisweni, akunakwenzeka ukuthi ushiywe wedwa. Futhi, ekugcineni, ukuze uqhubeke uphila, uzihlupha ngokwakho kanye nengqondo yakho. Indlela eyinhloko yokuphuma kwalesi simo iphinda uzame ukuthandana nomlingani wakho futhi ngaleyo ndlela ulethe umtshisekelo wesithakazelo esisha ebuhlotsheni bakho. Wena uthi, kunzima. Kholelwa ekubuseni okubizwa ngokuthi "H", okusho ukuthi akukho okungeke kwenzeke. Bheka kuye ngaphesheya, awukho isizathu, usaphila nalo muntu. Futhi, ngaphandle kwalokho, iqiniso lokuthi uthukuthele kuye, usazoqhubeka nokuningi. Thatha ngisho nalabo owawuthanda khona kanye, futhi wengeze kubo atholakele. Ake ucabange ngesimo azongena kuso kwesinye isifazane (cabanga ngokungazi kahle kwakho isithombe somphikisana ohlakaniphile, ngisho noma engekho) futhi ngeke ube nakho. Lapha-ke, uzoba nomuzwa wobunikazi. Uzokwenza ngokuzenzekelayo ngendlela enentshisekelo nokuyigcina kuzo zonke izici.
Futhi, njengezithasiselo kukho konke, ukuvuselela yonke imizwelo yothando, hlela iholide yothando. Kuphela wena kanye naye oyoba khona. Kuye, ungakhetha indawo lapho usuvele uphumule khona, phakathi nenqwaba yemizwa yakho. Futhi zama nje ukuphinda konke, ukulandela izinyathelo zakudala zobuhlobo bakho.
Futhi-ke, indlela engcono kakhulu kuyoba ingxoxo yakho yochungechunge ngesihloko: "Kuthiwani uma umyeni eba umkami engathandeki njengendoda?", Okufanele uvumelane nomphumela omuhle. Le ngxoxo enengqondo ingaxazulula okuningi. Into esemqoka ayesabi ngaye futhi ungangabazi ukuveza ukuthi yini ekukhathazayo. Futhi wena nonke uzothola indlela yokuphuma kule nkinga. Ungabi namahloni, umnike izivivinyo ezintsha ezenzweni zobulili. Ngikholelwa, into entsha neyongaphandle iyokusiza ukuba uthole isithakazelo esisha kumngane wakho womshado, njengendoda.