Ngokuvamile, abesifazane abaningi babecabanga ukuthi izinduna zabo babe nesibindi, bacabanga ukuthi akukho lutho olungabangela ukwesaba umuntu. Ngokusho kwabo, kulandela ukuthi akudingeki besabe. Kodwa ingabe lokhu kwenzeka ngesikhathi samanje, futhi kwenzeke kwenzeke ngokujwayelekile? Phela, uma owesifazane othembekile, ohlakaniphile, futhi ojabule emi phambi kwendodakazikazi, kunzima ukucabanga ukuthi unesaba owesifazane. Kodwa le ndoda nayo ine-phobias yakhe siqu. Kodwa indoda yangempela, ngenxa yezinkolelo zakhe, ngeke iwazise ngokuphathelene nabo. Nakuba angase abe nama-phobias anjengokuthi uma eqhathaniswa nabesifazane, azoba yingozi nakakhulu. Futhi kusukela lapha, ngenxa yalokho, umbuzo uvela ukuthi uhlobo lwesaba umuntu angaba nalo ngaphambi kowesifazane.
Kuhle kakhulu. Amantombazane amaningi aqiniseke ukuthi ukuba mnandi kumhle kuye. Kodwa akuwona wonke amantombazane oqaphela ukuthi iningi lesigqila sesilisa lomphakathi livele lihlazeke yintombazane enhle kakhulu. Yiqiniso, uma ufana nobuhle obuvela kumagazini odicizayo, uzobe esaba njalo njalo. Ngokufanayo, ukwesaba kuzophethwa ngokuthi uzocabangela ukuthi intombazane enjalo ingayiphonsa kalula ngenxa yomunye umuntu okhangayo, ocebile, ohlakaniphile noma othembisayo. Futhi ukuze akwazi ukugcina owesifazane onomfashini onjalo, kuzodingeka ahlale ekulwela ukuba ngcono kunento ethile. Kodwa umthwalo onjalo wokuziphatha nomzimba awukwazi ukumelana nawo wonke umuntu. Kuphela ozethemba kakhulu, ocebile, ohlakaniphile noma omdala emoyeni angakwazi ukumelana nanoma yikuphi ukuhlaselwa nokubulawa "kumlingani wakhe omhle. Ngaphezu kwakho konke lokhu, amadoda amaningi ayenesaba ukuthi owesifazane uzomlahla ngokupholile. Futhi kuleso simo abaningi babo abakwazi ukuvuma.
Ihlakaniphile kakhulu. Ngokuqinisekile akuyona imfihlo kunoma ubani ukuthi amadoda amaningi awawuthandi abesifazane abahlakaniphile kakhulu, ngaphandle kokuthi nabo banamaphutha. Kodwa ngesikhathi esifanayo, amadoda ambalwa akhetha abesifazane abayiziphukuphuku, abangafundile nabangenangqondo. Ngezinto ezinjalo ngezinye izikhathi kungase kube nzima kakhulu, njengama-blondes avela kuma-anecdotes angakwazi ngisho nokuvula ikhompyutha noma i-TV. Khona-ke akucaci lokho okungaba ukwesaba kwamadoda phambi komfazi. Kubonakala ukuthi lo wesilisa ukwesaba ukuhlakanipha kwakhe, hhayi ngobuqili, ukuxoshwa, ubuciko kanye namanye amaqhinga akhe. Ngokuvamile, amadoda ahlonipha abesifazane abafundele nabahlakaniphile, kodwa ngokuvamile abakhethi njengabangane babo bokuphila. Ngakho-ke, singaphetha ngokuthi kudingekile ukuba sibe ohlakaniphile, kodwa kudingeka futhi ube ngumuntu oyisiphukuphuku. Ngempela, indoda izohlala ijabule ukusiza kulokho okusolakala ukuthi awukwazi ukusebenzisa noma ukwenza okuthile.
Isebenza kakhulu. Le ndoda ngeke ihlatshwe umxhwele kakhulu ukuthi owesifazane usebenza kakhulu. Phela, uzocabanga ukuthi intombazane enjalo ngeke nje ibe nesikhathi sayo. Umsebenzi ungabonakaliswa nokuthi intombazane izama ukuthatha isinyathelo kuqala kumngane wakhe wokuqala. Ngempela, amadoda awakuthandi nje ukuziphatha okunjalo, kodwa futhi wesabe abesifazane abanjalo. Ikakhulukazi iphutha elivamile le ntombazane ngemuva komhlangano wokuqala nokuzijwayeza indoda kuyoba ukuthi uqala ukumgcwalisa ngezingcingo noma imiyalezo. Yebo, mhlawumbe uzoqhubeka ekhuluma nomuntu onjalo okhethekile, kodwa nakanjani ngeke abe nesifiso sokuba nobuhlobo obunzima nentombazane enjalo. Kuyoba ngcono uma umuntu ethatha konke okusemandleni, ikakhulukazi, amakholi futhi aqoke imihlangano elandelayo kuqala. Ngakho angase azizwe ephakeme, noma kunalokho amandla akhe angamadoda. Phela, lesi sinyathelo siyinqwaba yamandla.
Izingxoxo ezingavunyelwe. Abanye amadoda bakhetha abesifazane abakhululekile kakhulu, kuyilapho abanye bekhetha ukunakekisa kuphela abamele abesifazane abathobekile. Nakuba kunombono wokuthi eziningi zazo zisabaningi besifazane abashisayo, akudingeki ukuba ucabange ukuthi kunembile. Phela, olunye uhlangothi lwemali lungase luvule lapha: indoda ingalahlekelwa indima eyinhloko futhi ithathe indima yesibili, engavamile kubantu. Futhi ekugcineni, amadoda angase alahlekelwe ukuzethemba. Ngenxa yalokho, kukhona ukwesaba okukhulu emadodeni, okubandakanya ukungahloniphi kwabo. Kungcono ukuthola umhlabathi ophakathi ozohambisana nakho kokubili. Futhi, ungatsheli umuntu wakho mayelana nokuzijabulisa kwakhe kwangaphambili kobulili, ikakhulukazi ukuthakazelisa umdlandla odlule. Ngisho noma ingcono kakhulu embhedeni kunomlingani wamanje. Amazwi anjalo angakwazi ukuhlukanisa umthandi wakho kuze kube phakade.
Ukwesaba akuyona into efanele. Ukwesaba okunjalo kubangelwa ukuthi umuntu wesaba ukwenza ukhetho olungalungile, okuyinto kamuva azozisola futhi azibeke icala. Kakhulu kunakho konke akhathazeka ngakho ngokuthi emva kwesitembu esifisayo emadokhumenti, lona wesifazane uphenduka waba omunye umuntu, ohluke kakhulu kunamanje nangaphambili. Futhi abanye besaba ukuthi babe buthakathaka futhi bangenakuzivikela, noma besaba ukukhashelwa nokukhashelwa. Mhlawumbe yingakho, naphezu kwemizwa enamandla kakhulu futhi eqinile, amadoda aqala ukuzidonsa imaski yokunganaki noma ukunganakwa. Phela, ngokombono wabo, kuzoba lula futhi kube nokuthula ngenxa yokuthi abamane bangabhekana nezinkinga ezingenzeka. Futhi yiliphi ikhambi elizobe lithembekile kakhulu futhi lingenabuhlungu kakhulu. Ngabantu abanjalo kuyoba nzima nakakhulu, ngoba ukuze bavumele ukuba baqonde izinhloso zabo eziqotho nakakhulu, kuzothatha umzamo omkhulu. Kodwa uma umuntu ewufanele ngempela, akudingeki ukuba ungamkhohlwa.
Khumbula into eyodwa yokuthi amadoda angabantu abafana nabesifazane, kuphela abanemithetho yabo, imibono, isimo sengqondo sokuphila, ukwesaba kwabo owesifazane. Kudingeka ufunde ukwamukela iningi lawo libe yindoda ethile engumngane obaluleke kakhulu futhi obalulekile empilweni yakhe.