"Uma umuntu engalweli uthando, akayithandi," ingqondo

Sonke sisetshenziselwa ukuthi indoda yindoda, isilwane esilungele ukwenza noma yini ukuze sithole isilwane esifisa - ukugijimela empini nomphikisi, isibonelo. Omama nogogo bafundisa futhi basifundisa ukuthi into esemqoka emndenini kufanele ibe yindoda, ukuthi umndeni oqinile awunakwakhiwa nge-henpecked nokuthi intombazane akufanele "igijime" phezu kwensizwa, noma ngabe iyakuthandana naye. Kodwa insizwa kufanele ithole intombazane, imnakekele futhi yenza konke ukuqinisekisa ukuthi okhethiweyo wakhe uzizwa eyingqayizivele futhi eyingqayizivele kuye. Ngaphezu kwalokho, lona okhethiwe kakhulu, ngokwezifundiso zezizukulwane ezidala, unqume unyawo lwakhe lapho efuna, futhi indoda engase ibe khona kufanele isheshe igcwalise noma yisiphi isithandwa sabathandekayo bakhe. Uma, nganoma yisiphi isizathu, wenqaba ukwenza lokhu, kufanele ngokushesha kuthathwe njengomuntu ongakholwayo, umkhapheli futhi ongafanelanga uthando lendodakazikazi. Hhayi, uma kungazelelwe, "indodakazi yenkosi" eyimpofu, ephathekayo ifika, khona-ke indoda yangempela kufanele iqonde konke, ithethelele futhi iqale ukubuyisana. Ibukeka njengebhukadi yedeski lomgcini wekhulu le-19, akunjalo? Ngeshwa, omama bethu kanye nogogo babonakala beyingqayizivele endala yethu ekhula ngokushesha ezindabeni zothando. Futhi nakuba amantombazane ekhulu lokugcina ezindabeni zothando ayenokulula, iziyalezo zabo zokuziphatha azifaneleki nakancane kithi. Futhi-ke, uma ubhekene nombuzo othi "uma umuntu engalwi uthando, angathandi" , ingqondo yezinsizakalo kufanele ikuthande kuqala. Ake sizame ukuqonda ndawonye ukuthi leli qiniso liyiqiniso kangakanani ekhulwini lethu eliguquguqukayo, eliphezulu nelokungaqiniseki ngokuphelele.

Ngakho-ke, uyintombazane yanamuhla, uzithembele kuwe, kodwa ngokusho - " uma umuntu engalwi uthando, angathandi," ukucabanga kwengqondo yakho kuthobeka futhi kuyabona ukuthi leli qiniso liyiqiniso. Yini-ke? Futhi wena ngokwakho ungachaza ukuthi kusho ukuthini "ukulwela uthando"? Mhlawumbe uxubana phakathi kwabalandeli ababili, futhi awukwazi ukuthi kungani bengabibiyele ku-duel, abakunikeli imihlangano emithathu, ukuze unqume futhi unikeze impendulo yokugcina, ungazi kahle abazali bakho ukuze uthole indawo yabo? Noma nasi isibonelo esincane kakhulu: uxabana nomthandekayo wakho, futhi wabuyela endleleni, wanquma ukuthi kungcono ukukuyeka kunokuba wenze okuthile ngokwakho futhi uzenzele izinkinga ezengeziwe. Futhi wena, emva kokukhuluma, isibonelo, nomama wakho, weza esiphethweni sokuthi uma umuntu engalwi ukuthanda uthando, ngakho-ke akawuthandi , ingqondo yezobudlelwano iyinto engathí sina, kodwa ngokungazelelwe ikuholela ngezinye izikhathi ekuphethweni okungamanga. Ukwakha injabulo yakho kuyoba ekuqaleni, kodwa ngomunye umlingani, ubiza amagama angaphinde aqinisekiswe futhi akhononde ngawo wonke umuntu ongakwazi. Kodwa ingabe wenza into efanele? Ngemuva kokulandela le logic nesicwangciso sohlelo olunjalo, ungahlala nekhala lakho, ngoba abantu basuke bekhathele, yebo, imithombo. Ngakho cabanga ngezenzo zakho. Khumbula abesifazane abakhulu nobuhlobo babo emadodeni. Isibonelo, izwi lenye yezintandokazi ezithandayo, uGrace Kelly: "Indoda yemvelo ivilapha. Uma bonke besifazane benomsebenzi, amadoda angase ahlale ekhaya bephuza ubhiya bese ebuka iTV, "noma ibinzana elilahliwe ngumdlali, umdwebi nomlobi kumuntu oyedwa, uBette Davis:" Abesifazane abanamandla bayashada kuphela abantu ababuthakathaka. " Futhi laba bangabesifazane bekhulu lama-20! Ngakho uma ucabanga ukuthi kufanele kube khona into okufanele yenziwe yindoda yedwa, khona-ke uyiphutha kakhulu. Ubudlelwano bwakhiwa abantu ababili, futhi akunakwenzeka ukuvumela othile ohlelweni ukuba enze inqubo, njengokuthi uhlezi emhlabathini ngezandla eziboshwe. Uma udinga ngempela umuntu, uma umthanda ngempela, khona-ke uzokwenza konke ukwenza othandekayo wakho asondele. Uma ulungele ukuhlala amahora ngekhekhe lama-chips ku-TV futhi ulinde u-HE ukuba abize, kodwa ungabizi kuqala ngoba "uziqhenye," ngifisa sengathi ufisa ukubekezela nesitokisi phezulu kwamapipi iminyaka eminingi ... phambili.

Uyazi, uma ngibhala izihloko ezinjalo, ngicabanga ngokubambisana ukuthi thina, besifazane bekhulu lama-21, sikhononda ngalokho esikulwa ngakho ngo-19-esilwa nawo, futhi sagijima kuwo. Sifuna ukuzimela ngabesilisa - sibhekene nokuthi singanakwa, sifuna ukugwema ukuhlukunyezwa ngokobulili - manje sigqoka izingubo ezinhle, ngakho-ke amadoda kuphela asifuna, afuna umsebenzi - manje sesiyadabukisa ukuthi "silima njengamahhashi" njalonjalo okuqhubekayo. Amakhulu amabili emlandweni - pshik, futhi okuningi kushintshile. Ukubukwa komuntu kuye kwaba okuhlukile. Ake sicabange ngalokho umuntu akuzwayo, ngubani, njengoba ucabanga, akalweli uthando?

Amadoda konke ukuphila okumele kwenziwe okuthile. Kungenxa yokuthi bangamadoda. Tshala isihlahla-kumele, ukhulise indodana-kumele, wakhe indlu-kumele, uhlinzeke umndeni-kumele, usize umama-kumele, alwe uthando-kumele, njalo njalo njalo njalo njalo. Lokhu kungenxa yethu, amantombazane, okuningi okuthethelelwe futhi kuvunyelwe. Singabetha umuntu, futhi ngeke sithole lutho. Kodwa uma umuntu eshaya owesifazane, lokhu akungezelele ekuhlonipheni kwakhe.

Kodwa silwela ukulingana kwamadoda nabesifazane, okusho ukuthi kwaba khona ukuthi amadoda abe buthakathaka kancane, ahluleke kancane, akhululeke kancane. Owesifazane ngeke abe yisihle uma owokuqala ezoqoka usuku, owokuqala uzohamba ngokubuyisana, owokuqala uzonikeza ukushada, owokuqala uzomanga. Yiqiniso, ukuziqhenya kwethu kuyize, lapho sibona indlela indoda esibheka ngayo, indlela ebonisa ngayo imizwa yakhe. Kodwa ukuphikisana ngokuthi "akalwi ukuthanda" ngoba nje ngesimo esithile akenzanga njengoba singathanda, akufanele. Sivame ukuphishekela konke. Cabanga, ngoba lokho akwenzele kona, kuyinto enzima yokulwa naye. Uma ungathandi lokho ngezinye izikhathi akazange abonise isinyathelo, akazange enze okuthile, bese nje uxoxisane naye. Ngokuqinisekile indoda yakho inezizathu eziqinile. Ngomfanekiso ofanayo, bonke abantu bahlukile, futhi uma isimo sakho insizwa yakho singenzi lutho asiphindaphindiwe okokuqala, mhlawumbe lolu daba luyisimo sakhe, hhayi kuye, bese uzinqumela ukuthi unelisekile yini lesi simo, noma cha. Amadoda athande induduzo, futhi uma ubonga abathandekayo bakho, ngezinye izikhathi uya kuwo ukuze uthole imvume. Inhlanhla!