Uma ubuhlobo phakathi kwendoda nentombazane kuba nkulu ngokwanele, isikhathi sokukwazi abazali siza. Kusukela ekuqaleni uqala ukwakha ubudlelwane nomthandi nomama wakho, ubuhlobo bakho obuseduze buxhomeke ngqo. Yingakho udinga ukwazi ukwakha ubudlelwano nabazali bomfana.
Thola indawo evamile
Ukuze unqume ukuthi ungakha kanjani ubuhlobo nabazali bomfana, kuqala udinga ukuthola ukuthi unjani umndeni onakho. Ufuna ukuthanda umama noyise womfana, ngakho-ke kudingeka uqale wazi ukuthi ungubani nokuthi yini ayilutha. Ukuze wakhe ubuhlobo obuvamile, noma yikuphi abantu okufanele babe nokuthanda nezinto ezivamile. Lapha lokhu futhi ubuze umfana othandekayo uyise nomama, ukuthi ngubani owenza umsebenzi, abathintekayo kuwo, benzani ngesikhathi sabo sokuphumula. Uma uqonda ukuthi izithakazelo zakho zihambisana ngandlela-thile, kuhle. Khona-ke, ekukhulumisaneni nabazali, qiniseka ukuthi, kodwa ngokungajwayelekile, khumbula, isibonelo, ukuthi, njengomama wendodana esebenza izimbali ze-kanzashi, noma ususwe ebusheni bakho ngokuzingela futhi uyayithanda le midlalo ethile, nje kanye nobaba wakho womthandi.
Uma ungekho neze izithakazelo ezivamile nabazali bomfana, ungapheli futhi udale okuthile. Ukwakha ubuhlobo, abaningi baqala ukudala amaphuzu okucabangela oxhumana nawo. Futhi lokhu kuyiphutha ngempela. Phela, ngokuhamba kwesikhathi kuzodingeka ukuthi uvume ukuthi awufuni neze ukugcoba ngesiphambano noma ukuqoqa izinhlobo ezingavamile zezicabucabu. Futhi konke okwakwakwakhiwa kakade kungabhubhisa, ngoba abazali bomuntu omusha bayothola ukuthi ungumqambimanga ozama ukuzithemba nganoma iyiphi indlela.
Yiba yinkosikazi, kodwa ungayidluli.
Ukuxhumana nabazali, zama ukuziphatha ngokwemvelo nangokwemvelo. Kodwa kulokhu, futhi, ungakhathazeki. Akudingeki uhlale sengathi uginje insika, uziphatha ngobuqotho futhi uqine kakhulu. Ngokwemvelo, ekuqaleni umuntu wonke unzima ngabantu abangabazi ongafuni ukuwajabulisa. Kodwa-ke, uma ubona ukuthi abazali bayizizwe ezilula, bethandana nabo, baxhumana kalula, ungakhululeka futhi ukhulume ngokuthula nabo. Yiqiniso, akufanele uvumele ukuthi ungabonakali, hamba ukuhleka, uhleka kakhulu. Noma kunjalo, kufanele babone ukuthi eduze kwendodana yabo kuyintombazane, hhayi ingane encane.
Kodwa yini okufanele uyenze uma ubona ukuthi abazali bomuntu omncane banzima futhi balungile, futhi uhluke ngokuphelele? Kulesi simo, zikhethele ukuthi ungahlala udlala yini phambi kwabo owesifazane wangempela. Uma kunjalo, ke uziphathe ngendlela engcono kakhulu, indlela abayifunayo futhi abayilindele ngayo. Kodwa uma uqonda ukuthi awukwazi ukuma ngisho kanye, ungazitholi futhi udlale. Yiba njengoba ukhona, futhi lapho kuzokutshela ukuthi bazokwamukela noma cha. Kulesi simo, akudingeki ngaso sonke isikhathi ukuba nethemba lobuhlobo obuhle nabazali. Kodwa ngakolunye uhlangothi, akudingeki udlale izilaleli futhi uhlale uzihlupha.
Ungasho okubi ngothandekayo wakho
Ukuze bakhe ubudlelwane obuvamile nabazali bendodana encane, akukaze kudingeke ukuthi baxoxisane nendodana yabo nabo futhi baveze umfana ngendlela engafanele. Ngisho noma umama nobaba bethi indodana yabo ayilungile futhi ingalungile ezimweni ezithile, ngokufanayo, zama ukuphawula ngezenzo zakhe futhi ngokuqinisekile ungambulali le nsizwa ngendlela engafanele. Khumbula ukuthi bonke abazali bathanda "ngokuvimbela", bakhulume ukuthi izingane zabo zenza okuthile okungalungile, kodwa azifuni ukuzwa kwabanye abantu.
Ekukhulumisaneni nabazali bendodana, gcina kahle futhi ulungele. Khumbula ukuthi awulona oontanga, izindaba eziningi ongatshela abangane nezintombi, abazali akufanele bazwakale. Ngisho noma bantfu abathokozile nabanamuhla, kuyinto eyodwa ukuzwa okuthile ngabangamazi futhi nakanjani - mayelana nentombazane yendodana yakhe. Ungakhohlwa ukuthi bonke obaba nabamama babheka amadodana abo izikhulu ezifanelwe amakhosazana angempela.