Manje uvame kakhulu ukuzwa kubadala igama elithi "akunakwenzeka", futhi uma engalaleli, angathola ngisho nopapa. Lesi yisikhathi esinzima empilweni yengane, futhi kuyinkimbinkimbi nakakhulu uma abazali beziphatha ngokungavumelani: namuhla - bayavuma, kusasa - bavunyelwe. Izingane aziqondi ukuthi kungani "engakwazi", futhi umfowabo omdala nabazali "bangakwazi." Futhi ngokuvamile, kungani kuvame ukuvela ukuthi kuyamnandi, kuyathandeka - kuvinjelwe, kodwa yikuphi "okusemandleni" kanye "nesidingo" - okuphambene nalokho?
I-kid, yebo, izama ukuphikisana ngendlela engakwazi ngayo: ingenangqondo, ayilaleli, iphula amathoyizi, "iphindiselela" umfowabo - lokhu kwengqondo yengane ... Singayithola kanjani incazelo yegolide lapha, ukuze singabhidliza ubuntu obuningi futhi ngesikhathi esifanayo singavumi , hhayi ukuvumela konke ukuvunyelwa? Ukuze ungadideki kule nkinga yemfundo eyinkimbinkimbi, kufanelekile ukucabangela amaphuzu ambalwa abalulekile.
Ukuvimbela kusebenza kuwo wonke amalungu omndeni, kuhlanganise nabantu abadala. Uma ungakwazi ukubeka umunwe wakho esikhwameni, awukwazi konke, ngoba kuyingozi empilweni. Ukuvimbela kunzima kakhulu futhi kudinga ukusebenza okunamandla. Ngaphambi kokumemezela ukuvinjelwa kwengane, uhlu lwabo kufanele luxoxisane phakathi kwabo ngamalungu omndeni omdala. Uma izinqatshelwe zihlonipha bonke, lokhu kuzophinde kubonise ingane ukuthi igcwele ilungu lomphakathi (umndeni) njengabantu bakhe abaseduze.
Izivimbelo zisebenza kumuntu othile ngesikhathi esithile futhi, ukuze ugweme ukucindezeleka, zidinga ukusebenza okuqondile. Isibonelo, umama angasebenzisa ummese obukhali, vula igesi esitofu, ngakho angakwenza. Umntwana akafundile okwamanje, okusho ukuthi lezi zinto zasendlini zingaphansi komkhawulo oqinile.
Kodwa-ke, izidingo kanye nokuvinjelwa akufaki ukukwazi ulwazi: ingane kufanele ikwazi ukuthi abadala basebenze kanjani ngendaba eyingozi. Mbonise ukuthi umkhonto okhaliphile, ukuthi usika kanjani isinkwa, kodwa ngesikhathi esifanayo uchaza ukuthi ungayinquma ngommese futhi kuyoba buhlungu kakhulu. Kubalulekile ukuba ingane ikwazi futhi ikholwe ukuthi imingcele, ngokungafani nokuvinjelwa, yesikhashana "ayivunyelwe" ngenkathi incane. Ngakho-ke, unyaka ongeke ukwazi ukuthatha imingcele futhi uxhumane nenethiwekhi yobuchwepheshe, kodwa umfowabo-umfana wesikole usukwazi ukufaka ngokunembile ipulaki esitolo noma ukulungiselela ukudla kwasekuseni, futhi angakwenza.
Uhlu lwezinqatshelwe nemingcele akumele kube mkhulu kakhulu. Uma ingane izwa manje: "Ungayithinti, ungayithathi, kuyingozi, akusikho," akunakwenzeka ukubekezelela lokhu. Ukuze ashintshe isimo sakhe esingalungile endlini, uzothatha imicibisholo yommese kanye nommese ngasese, bese ufaka ama-plugs zibe ezitokweni, njll. Eqinisweni, abantu abadala ngokwabo bayamcasula ukuba azivelele ezingozini. Ngaphezu kwalokho, ukusebenzisa izinqatshelwe ngokugcwele, abadala empeleni badala umntwana "indawo eyingozi" lapho engeke akwazi ukukhula nokuthuthukisa ngendlela evamile. Ukuhlala esimweni esicindezelayo nokwesaba njalo kungaholela ekwakhiweni kwezinkimbinkimbi ezingokwengqondo kwengane.
Ukuze ugweme lokhu, zama ukunciphisa inani lezinqatshelwe nemingcele ngokulinganiselwe okungenani. Ucabanga ukuthi lokhu akunakwenzeka? Khona-ke ngikukwazisa ukuthi wenze lokhu okulandelayo. Bhala ephepheni lakho yonke imingcele kanye nokuvimbela okungazama ukufundisa ingane yakho ngempumelelo. Futhi manje bahlukanise zibe izingxenye ezintathu:
1. Imingcele ngenxa yokuphepha kwayo.
2. Imingcele ukuze ungesabi ukuphepha kwempahla yomndeni.
3. Izivimbelo ezichazwe yisifiso somuntu siqu sokuba abantu bazizwe bekhululekile, bekhululekile futhi bezethemba.
Khombisa eyodwa - lokhu okungenani "akunakwenzeka", ukugcinwa okumele kutholakale kumntwana. Esimweni sesibili, okuhlangenwe nakho kwakho kokuphila kuzokutshela indlela yokunciphisa i-fidget encane, ukuze ingasiphuli i-vase encane kakhulu, ayikhiphi i-monitor yekhompyutha etafuleni, ibamba intambo, ayizange ilahle yonke ilineni ngaphandle kwekamelo phansi ... Ikhibhodi - ukhiye, ephakeme. Uma kungekho ukukhiya eminyango, i-tape yokunamathisela izosebenza. I-vase, i-perfume, izimonyo, njll, ukususa okwesikhashana emehlweni. Futhi njalo. Ukuze uvikele ingane ekulimazeni nasezingozi, ngenkathi unciphisa inani lamathebhu aqinile, unga (futhi ngezinye izikhathi udinga nje) ngendlela efanayo. Ungalokothi uhambe ezindaweni ezifinyeleleka kuzo zonke izinto zokugwaza nokusika, ukufanisa, ukukhanya, imithi, amakhemikhali omkhaya, uviniga, njll. Bilisa i-kettle ebusweni obude. Isetshenziswa insimbi - nayo isusa esonweni, ize ikhulile.
Ngokuqondene nephuzu lesithathu, abantu abadala banelungelo lokungasese, ukuphumula okuthulile, isikhathi samahhala, naphezu kwezingane futhi bazama ukugcwalisa yonke indawo yakho yokuphila. Ungazikhohlwa ngaleli qiniso: inkululeko yodwa ingumkhawulo wenkululeko yomunye. Uma ufuna ukuthula okuphelele kusukela kwengane ngenkathi ubukela uchungechunge oluthandayo lwe-TV, ucabanga ukuthi kulungile. Kodwa uma umama ekhathele, walala embhedeni, ngakho-ke, ingane kufanele ichazwe ukuthi akunakwenzeka ukwenza umsindo okwamanje.
Yethula inani lezidingo kanye nokuvinjelwa kwengane kancane kancane, ukukhuluma okungaphezu kweyodwa ngosuku. Futhi kufanele kwenziwe ngesikhathi esifanayo lapho umntwana eqala ukubonisa isithakazelo. Lapha unesithakazelo kakhulu kwi-rosette - ngitshele ukuthi kukhona ukuphila okwamanje okungathandi kakhulu uma iminwe yakhe ingena emgodini wakhe futhi "ingaluma". Wabe esebheka isitofu segesi, ufinyelela izandla ezicwebezelayo - sekuyisikhathi sokukhuluma ngengozi yegesi nomlilo. Kodwa ungesabi ingane, ukhulume kuphela ngezinsongo zangempela. Ungamfihli ingane ukuthi ibuhlungu futhi iyokhala, kodwa awukwazi ukwesaba odokotela abanezijovo - uzohlupheka uma kufanele umjobe esikhathini esizayo. Futhi ungaqambi amanga, ukuthi othile uzophuma ngaphandle bese ehamba ehlathini elimnyama. Ingane ayikho leyo ndawo, uzoyesaba ukungena ekamelweni.
Zama ukugwema igama elithi "akunakwenzeka" kanye nezinhlayiya "hhayi", eziqale zithwala umlayezo ongalungile. Ngaphezu kwalokho, kuze kube sezingeni elithile ubuchopho bomntwana abuqondi ukuthi inhlayiyana "ayikho" futhi amagama omama athola incazelo ephikisana ngokuphelele (esikhundleni sokuthi "ungathathi" - "thatha", "ungakhuphuki" - "ukukhuphuka", njll). Kunconywa ukuba ubeke esikhundleni sabo nezinye izinguquko. Isibonelo, "awukwazi ukuthinta isitofu" esikhundleni sokuthi "ukuthinta i-slab kuyingozi", kodwa "ungakhuphuki etafuleni, uzowa!" shintsha "itafula eliphezulu, futhi uma ukhuphuka kuwo, ungawa!". Ngaphezu kwalokho, zama ukulungisa ingane kuqala ekuthuthukiseni okungalungile kwezehlakalo, ngoba izitatimende ezinjengokuthi "uwe, ushaye, uzophuka, njll" Empeleni, sebevele bekhuluma ngeqiniso lokuthi kukhona okunye okusele okuzogcwaliseka.
Ukuphila kwengane kwinethiwekhi enamandla yezinqatshelwe nemingcele ngeke isetshenziswe. Ngokusho kwengqondo yezingane, izidingo kanye nokuvinjelwa akugcini nje ukuthuthukisa eziningi zezimo eziyinkimbinkimbi emntwaneni, kodwa futhi kumbhubhise ngokuphelele, njengomuntu. Zama ukuthola igolide elisho ukuthi ungamlondolozi impilo kuphela, kodwa futhi umuzwa wenjabulo nenjabulo.