Manje igama elithi "complex" lisetshenziswe abaningi, kodwa akubona wonke umuntu owazi ukuthi kusho ukuthini. Owokuqala mayelana nalezi zinkimbinkimbi wakhuluma uKarl Jung, futhi nguye owafaka igama ukusetshenziswa. Ngokwe-Young, le nkimbinkimbi "ukuveza imizwelo nemicabango ebuyele emuva ekungeneni". Ngamanye amazwi, le nkimbinkimbi iyindlela yokuzizwa kwemizwa kanye nesimo somuntu, izisusa zakhe, izinhlangano zakhe, zonke zazo ezinomthelela oqondile ekuziphatheni kwengqondo komuntu kanye nesimo sobuntu bakhe.
Le nkimbinkimbi ingafaniswa nesilonda esivulekile: kufanelekile ukuyiphazamisa, futhi umuntu uqala ukuzizwa engakhululekile futhi engahlehlisi, angase aqinisekiswe, abonise ukuhlukunyezwa noma, ngokuphambene, alahleke kuye. Ukuphendula okunjalo, okubangwa yizinkimbinkimbi zangaphakathi, kwenza njengodonga olungabonakali oluvimbela indlela eya enkululeko, aluvumeli umuntu abe namandla futhi azimele. Kodwa-ke, izinkimbinkimbi zinezinto eziphambene nazo: ngakolunye uhlangothi, ngenxa yabo umuntu uba yingozi futhi angakwazi ukuzivikela ngaphambi kwezwe elikhulu, kodwa ngakolunye uhlangothi, izinkimbinkimbi zingaba yisisusa sokwenza ngcono.
Ukwakhiwa kwezinkimbinkimbi
Kungani sizama kanzima ukususa lezi zinkimbinkimbi? Iqiniso liwukuthi ngomuntu ogcwele izinkathazo ezihlukahlukene, kuba nzima ukukhulumisana: angakwazi ukusabela ngokungafanele ngamanye amazwi nezenzo zabanye abantu. Ngokuvamile kunalokho, abantu abayinkimbinkimbi baye bandisa ukusola, umona, ukunganeliseki, ukuziqhenya, ukukhohlisa ... Yingakho abanye abantu bengathandwa.
Ngokuvamile izinkimbinkimbi esibhekene nazo ekuphileni, zakhiwa zisencane. Isibonelo, ukuze ajwayeze indodakazi yakhe ukuba ilandise, umama wakhe wayevame ukuphindaphinda kuye: "Uzwela kakhulu, bheka ukuthi yiziphi izinhlobo zamabhodi ezenzeka ekamelweni lakho, ukubheka ezinengekayo!" Noma enendodana, futhi, ngenjongo yokufundisa bathi: "Kungani ukhona uyisiphukuphuku, waphinde waba nokuhlukana kwezibalo! Thatha isibonelo esisebenzini sikaVasya esihle kakhulu! " Ukuziphatha okunjalo kubonakala yizingane ngokubuhlungu kakhulu, futhi ngesikhathi esifanele kunezinkinga zokungahlambuluki, okuyizinto ezikhushulwa yizingxenye ezengeziwe - ukusebenza okungesikoleni esikoleni, ukungakwazi ukuthola ulimi olufanayo neontanga, ukuthuthukisa amathalenta namakhono. Ekuphileni komuntu onjalo kakade ngaphandle kokuqaphela ukuthi uzama ukuthola futhi "ukudonsa izindlebe" zokulungiswa ekunqotjweni kwabo, befuna isiqiniseko sokuthi ulahlekile futhi akakwazi ukwenza lutho. Isimo esinjalo simvimbela umuntu endleleni eya ekufezeni impilo ephumelelayo.
Inselele enkulu ukuthi leyo nkinga enkulu, ngenxa yalokho okuyinkimbinkimbi eyakhiwe, kancane kancane ikhohliwe futhi iphoqelelwe ngaphandle kweminye imicimbi. Ngakho-ke, umuntu akakwazi ukuxhuma ukwehluleka kwakhe nomthombo oyinhloko wezinkinga zakhe nesimo esiyinkimbinkimbi. Futhi uma ungazi ukuthi yini okufanele ulwe, khona-ke usuke usuzolahlwa ukunqoba.
Ukunciphisa okuncane
Labo bantu abanesisindo esibucayi banesiqiniseko sokuthi bahamba kabi nakakhulu kunabanye futhi bazibeka ngaphambi kokuhluleka. Bacabanga ukuthi uma "bebi" kangaka, khona-ke akukho lutho lokuthanda, ukwazisa nokuhlonipha. Ukufuna ukuthula kwangaphakathi nokuqeda imizwa yabo ecindezelayo, abantu abanenkinga yokunciphisa ukuzama ukuzithuthukisa ngokwengqondo ngandlela-thile, ukwenza okuthile okuhle kwabanye, ngaleyo ndlela bazame ukuvela ekukhanyeni okuhle kubantu futhi babonise ukuthi bangcono, kuneqiniso. Kodwa kwenzeka ukuthi ukuze umxhwele abanye, umuntu onjalo uphawula ekukhohliseni. Ngamanye amazwi, umuntu ovelele uzama ukukhombisa impumelelo yakhe nokuzithelela kuzo zonke izigaba zokuphila. Angazama ukuthenga izinto ezibiza kakhulu kuphela, izimoto, amafoni, ngisho noma echitha imali yakhe yokugcina kubo noma ekhuphuka emalinileko; abakwazi ukuphuma ejimini kuphela ukuze babonise abantu abakuzungezile biceps zabo ezinzima futhi babone ukubukeka kokubheka; angakwazi ukuziqhayisa ngakwesobunxele nangokwesibalo senani lothando lwakhe noma iqiniso lokuthi uyazi kahle umengameli ... Nokho, ngokuvamile umfanekiso womuntu onokwanelisayo uyisibluc. Futhi uma le nkohliso iphikisana, ubunzima obuphansi buzoqhakaza embala omuncu futhi umuntu uyoba nezinkinga ngokuxhumana nabanye, emsebenzini, nabantu abaseduze.
Lapho usakhula, ubunzima obuphansi buvela kakhudlwana ngenxa yanoma yiziphi izinkinga ezibonakalayo, ngenxa yokulawulwa kwabazali abanamandla, noma, ngokuphambene, ngokunakekelwa ngokwanele kwengane ezihlotsheni nabazali endaweni yokuqala. Umthelela omubi ubuye ugxeke ngokweqile ingane, ukuhlazeka othisha nontanga, ukuhlukunyezwa kwengqondo (isibonelo, isahlukaniso sabazali, ukufa kwabathandekayo) ezitholakala ebuntwaneni. Zonke lezi zikhathi zingabangela ukunganeliseki nawe, ukuthi ukwehluleka kwakho kungagxiliwe kakhulu. Lokhu kuholela ekubeni ingane iqala ukulungiswa ngokuhluleka kwakhe, ubuciko bukhula kuye futhi bukhulile lapho sithola umuntu ohlukumezeka kakhulu.
I-psychoanalyst yaseJalimane u-Alfred Adler, oqale wasebenzisa inkulumo ethi "ukungathandwa kwezinto eziphansi," wayethanda ukuthi: "Ukuze kuthathwa njengomuntu ogcwele, umuntu kufanele abe nesimo esiphansi." Futhi kunjalo ngempela. Noma kunjalo, ukubonakaliswa kwalokhu okuyinkimbinkimbi akuvumeli umuntu ukuba aphile ngokuthula naye futhi athole ukuvumelana. Uyazi kanjani ukuthi unenkinga encane? Insimbi yokuqala ingaba isimo sengqondo esibucayi kakhulu ekubukeni kwayo. Uma ungenelisekile ngokuma kwekhanda lakho, ubukhulu bezindebe, ubukhulu bendabuko, ukuphakama, ubude bekhala, njll, khona-ke usenaso ubunzima obuphansi. Futhi ukunganeliseki kwakhe ngesimo sakhe sezezimali, isikhundla sezenhlalakahle, ukuphumelela komsebenzi kukhuluma ngokukhona kwakhe.
Kodwa iningi lamantombazane namanje likhathazeka kakhulu ngokubukeka kwabo. Izindinganiso zanamuhla zobuhle, esizibonayo emakhasini omagazini abalukhuni, izikhangiso zokukhangisa, izikrini ze-TV, ziphoqa abesifazane abaningi ukuba bacabange ukuthi abaphelele. Nakuba ukuthuthukisa ubunzima obuphansi kwesigamu esihle sabantu kungasetshenziswa ngamasentimitha amahlanu, uma kunqunywa ngamazwi abalulekile ngabesifazane. Umphumela walezi ziqubble kungaba, isibonelo, ukufisa ukuphampa izindebe zakho noma ukwenza isifuba ubukhulu obukhulu obukhulu.
Isisindo esiyinkimbinkimbi
Uma umuntu enenkimbinkimbi enjalo, ukholelwa ukuthi impilo yakhe yayimbi kakhulu kunalokho okungenzeka. Ukuphazamisa kulezi zinkinga nokuzicindezela, unamathela eminye imibono neziphetho ezisiza ukuba azizwe enenjongo. "Ake ngingeke ngikwazi ukwenza umsebenzi futhi ngibe abangane, kodwa mina ngingowesizwe esikhulu esinqobe i-fascism." Kufanele kuphawulwe, akufanele kuvezwe, futhi ukuphikisana okumele kuqinisekiswe ukuthi akuyona into eqinile, kodwa isakhiwo esiyinkimbinkimbi akudingeki ukuba sinqunywe, futhi ukungaqiniseki kwengqondo kwayo kungaqhubeka nokugqoka nokubonga.
Inkimbinkimbi ye-infantilism
Abanikazi bale nkimbinkimbi abafuni ukucabanga ngezinkinga zabantu abadala. Abathandi ukwenza izinqumo futhi bazibophezele ngokwabo. Azikho konke ukuzimela, okuvame ukuholela ekubuneni ekusebenzelaneni nobulili obuhlukile nabanye abantu. Isibonelo, kuvame ukuthi kwenzeka ukuthi ukudla nokudla ngokweqile kungumphumela wale nkimbinkimbi. Phela, ukuzilawula ekudleni noma ukuyeka ngesikhathi sokuphuza utshwala, kudingeka ube umuntu ovuthiwe ngokwanele, futhi ungaziphathe njengengane encane, noma ngabe ikuphi ithuba, eqhuba izifiso zayo kanye nezifiso zayo ngokushesha.
Amacala akhethekile
Ngesinye isikhathi odokotela baxilonga ngamaklayenti abo okuzigcwalisa ngokweqile (ukuphelelisa ngokweqile), lapho umuntu oyedwa ehlanganisa ukuzikhukhumeza nokuzikhukhumeza. "Kuyinto engavamile ukuthola indoda ehlakaniphile kunaye!" - ngezinye izikhathi uthi uhlobo, yena ngokwakhe ubuwula obungavamile kakhulu nokungazi. Abantu abanjalo bavame ukukholelwa ukuthi bayazi ukuthi yini enhle kubo, futhi bayaqiniseka ukuthi iseluleko sabachwepheshe asifaneleki, ngoba akukho okudingekayo, okukhulunywa ngakho, akudingekile. Ngokuvamile kunezinto eziyinkimbinkimbi zabampofu, iphoqa umuntu, kungakhathaliseki ukuthi ucebile futhi ucebile kangakanani, ukuzama ukuthola izinto ezibonakalayo, ukubuthelela ngaphandle kokulinganisa futhi ngesikhathi esifanayo ube nomdlandla futhi unomunyu.
Ukungabikho kwezinkimbinkimbi
Icala lapho kunzima ukungahambi kwakhe. Emva kwakho konke, khona-ke umuntu akanalo isifiso futhi udinga ukuthuthukisa nokuthuthukisa. Kungani uguqula okuthile kuwe, uzame ukuthola okuhle, uma konke kuhle kuwe? Ngakho-ke, uma ujabule ngokwakho, cabanga: ulungile? Mhlawumbe kufanele uzibheke ngokujulile.