Ukushaqeka ukusebenzisana okunjalo kungaba kuphela abazali kanye nabesifazane abashadile, abangakwazi ukuqonda ukuthi intombazane itholakala kukhethiweyo wakhe. Futhi, iqiniso-yini?
Ngenxa yobudala
Abesifazane abasebasha abathandana namadoda bakhulu kakhulu kunabo, bamukela ukuthi ekuqaleni bazizwa behlukile futhi bengenakwenzeka. Ngomlingani onjalo, bakhululekile kakhulu kunokwethu, kokubili emphakathini nasesidlangalaleni. Lokho abesifazane abakuthola emadodeni abo abathandayo, abaningi abaqondi, ngoba lokhu kuyithando.
Oontanga abazange bazuze okuningi ekuphileni okwamanje. Ngaphezu kwalokho, abazi ukuthi kufanele banakekele kahle kanjani abesifazane, ukuba banakekele futhi banakekele. Futhi ngokuvamile uvame ukudumaza abathandekayo babo ngokuzikhandla ngokweqile futhi baphuthuma embhedeni, isifiso sokwenza isenzo socansi ngokwayo, futhi hhayi ukujabulela yonke imiqondo yezinzwa.
Amadoda avuthiwe axwayisa izifiso zentombazane, angamtshela zonke izimfihlo zobulili kanye nobuqili bawo. Ngenxa yalokho, owesifazane osemusha onomuntu ovuthiwe naye ovuthiwe uthola injabulo enobulili enamandla, okwenziwa yontanga engakwazi ukuyenza ngaso sonke isikhathi. Lokho owesifazane akuthola kumuntu othandekayo, abaningi bethu bazama ukuthola impendulo yalo mbuzo.
I-reverse side
Abacansi be-sexologists baxwayisa ukuthi indondo okuthiwa "ovuthiwe, obanjwe ngumyeni" iyisikhathi esilandelayo. Ngeshwa, ngokungafanisi kuthatha amandla nempilo yomlingani wakho.
Ukuphakanyiswa ngokocansi, okwenzeka kumuntu oneminyaka engamashumi amane onomfazi osemusha, ngokuvamile kuqhubeka iminyaka emibili kuya kwemibili. Khona-ke umxhwele wakhe uphahla futhi ngaphambi kokuba owesifazane osemusha engazi kahle konke okujabulisayo ubudlelwane obuseduze, owesilisa okhathele, obhekene neminyaka, umsebenzi, futhi ngokuvamile enakekela imindeni emibili ngesikhathi esisodwa kubonakala. Akasakwazi ukwenza uthando ngesigqi esisodwa esiyinkimbinkimbi njengomlingani wakhe.
Abaningi abakulungele ukuphendula umbuzo abesifazane abangatholakala kuwo amadoda abo abathandayo.
Ngokwezengqondo ze-psychologists, ukuhlukunyezwa okukhulu kobudlelwane bomndeni emshadweni nomuntu ovuthiwe nakho kuyashintsha izindima zengqondo. Ngokuvamile isimo sinjengalokhu.
Ekuqaleni, owesifazane osemusha ubona umyeni wakhe engumvikelali nobaba, othembekile ngokumfihla ngaphansi kwephiko lakhe, ngokushesha nje lapho ephuma esihlahleni somzali. Indoda ibona intombazanyana njengowesifazana, eduze kwayo ukuthi uzizwa eyinhloko yangempela yomndeni, engamngakwazi ukushada naye.
Kodwa emva kweminyaka embalwa, amadoda, njengokubusa, aqala ukudinga ukunakekelwa kwabesifazane ngaphezulu. Sebevele befuna "umama" kumfazi okhulile, obengabanakekela. Ngesikhathi esifanayo, owesifazane osemusha oye waba nomuzwa wokuthi umnotho wakhe uneminyaka yobudala, udinga le nkathi kungenjalo "indodana" noma "ubaba". Ufuna ukubona eduze komngane wakhe, umngane, ongabelana naye nezithakazelo nezinkinga zakhe ngokulingana okulinganayo.
Uma abashadile bengagcini izinguquko ezenzekayo nomlingani, uma bengayitholi indlela yokuphuma kweso simo, umshado onjalo uphelela. Futhi ngesikhathi esifanayo le ndoda ihlupheka kakhulu ... Yini abesifazane abayithola kumadoda abo abathandekayo, uma kucacile ukuthi i-satellite ayiyona into ekhangayo kakhulu? Mhlawumbe, lokhu kuyindaba yothando.
Ukunqoba
Noma kunjalo akufanele ucabange ukuthi imishado enjalo ayinaso ikusasa. Uma kusukela ezinsukwini zokuqala zomshado oshadile abalingani bazofuna iphuzu lokuxhumana nomunye nomunye, bahlakulele ulimi oluvamile, bafunde ukuzilungisa ngokwabo ukuze baphumelele emahlombe ehlombe, kanti ubuhlobo obunjalo buyakwazi ukumelana neziphepho ezinamandla kakhulu zansuku zonke.
Indima enkulu idlalwe ukunambitheka nokuphila. Uma bobabili abalingani bakhetha umculo we-classics nezincwadi noma njengokudoba nokuhamba ngezinyawo, banesithakazelo ekukhulumisaneni nasekusebenziseni ukuzijabulisa ndawonye. Imvelo nayo ibaluleke kakhulu: ukusekelwa kwabangane, abangane nezihlobo kubamba inyunyana.