Okudingayo ukwazi owesifazane ukuze angamthathi umyeni wakhe

Ngokuvamile isikebhe somndeni sishaya, futhi isizathu salokhu akusiyo isimiso somndeni, njengoba kuvame ukukholelwa, kepha ingqondo yengqondo yowesifazane ongakwazi ukumnika wakhetha injabulo yokuba, umqondo wokugcwalisa nokugculiswa ngokuphila.

Ngempela, amadoda abazingeli, kodwa akuwona wonke umuntu omele ingxenye enhle yesintu angase asekele isithakazelo somuntu wakhe okhethiwe emkhakheni wokuphila komndeni, lapho insimu isivele imakwe futhi inqotshwa, futhi intshisekelo ebuntwini bomlingani iqala kancane kancane kodwa inzima. Hlanganisa ama-archtypes amaningana wabesifazane, okuyiwona abeka ingozi yowesifazane olahlekelwa ngumyeni wakhe, noma, ngokuphambene, - ukubangela ukuhlukaniswa komndeni womunye. Cabanga ngabo ngokuningiliziwe ukuze kunqume izindima zesifazane bese uqonda ukuthi kuyadingeka ukwazi owesifazane ukuze angamthathi umyeni wakhe.

Ngakho-ke, "i-villain", uyisinki, isidla, idemoni. Ungakhumbuli kanjani u-Lady Winter kusukela efilimu edumile "D'Artagnan kanye namaMusketeers amathathu". Owesifazane onjalo ujabulela iqiniso lokuthi ukubandakanyeka kwakhe ekubhujisweni kwenjabulo yomuntu. Kuye, akubaluleke kakhulu lo muntu ngokwakhe, njengendlela yokukhohlisa kwakhe. Lapho esebenzelana nesisulu, "obala" uyacaca okhethiweyo wakhe ukuthi naye uyazibona izinjabulo ezinjengoba nomoya nangokomzwelo njengokuba kungekho omunye wesifazane. Ubulili obukhulayo, uhlobo lwenselelo kumuntu kanye nokukwazi ukuthakazelisa - amakhadi ecilongo ale nkosikazi. Yingakho abesifazane ababulalayo bathandwa kakhulu ngabantu - nabo bangabazingeli bangempela. Noma kunjalo, ngubani kulo mbuzo ungumzingeli, futhi ngubani umdlalo - lowo omunye umbuzo.

Abesifazane - "ama-simpletons" - afaneleke ngokugcwele ubudlelwane bomndeni, athola injabulo yabo yangempela, kodwa, maye, laba besifazane bakhathazeka ngokushesha kakhulu emadodeni ngokuqondile ngenxa yokuntuleka kokungazibikezeli, imfihlakalo kanye nokunciphisa okuheha abantu kakhulu. Abesifazane abanjalo banesimanga futhi bengathandeki, nakuba behlala njalo bexhaswa, banakekela, bathembekile futhi bezomnotho. Kodwa lo muntu akahlali ngesinkwa sodwa. Ngeshwa, naphezu kwayo yonke imizamo, kulaba besifazane ngokuvamile abantu baya.

Ekufuneni komunye owesifazane, impilo izophendukela umuntu "ukwehluleka": noma ngabe yikuphi, lo muntu uyathemba, umngane olandelayo ngeke amsole ngakho yonke imihlatshelo yakhe elethwe kuye egameni lothando. Indoda ifuna ukubona owesifazane eduze kwakhe, ngubani ozomnika konke ngaphandle kokumangalelwa. Ngokungangabazeki, owesifazane "olahlekile" uyazidela ngempela umyeni wakhe, kodwa ukuhlambalaza nokukhunjulwa njalo kwalesi sigameko kumcasula umuntu, okwenza azisole ngokuthi waze waxhumana nalokho okwakunomdlandla wangaphambili. Njengomthetho, i-archtype enjalo ihlanganisa nabesifazane abanezimfuno ezigciniwe, abahlale benelisekile ngokuphila nokuziphatha kwabanye. Ukusho kwakhe emhlabeni, uqala ukubonisa ngomuntu wakhe, obangela ukuthi ulahlekelwe isineke futhi ashiye ukukhuthazwa okusha.

Owesifazane - "intatheli" - ubizwa ngokuthi awunalo umsebenzi, kodwa ngenxa yokuhlukumezeka nobukhulu ezenzweni zakhe. Owesifazane onjalo ukholelwa ukuthi uyazi konke mayelana namadoda futhi uyakubona, uqondile, uyazethemba futhi ukhangele ngokwanele emehlweni ensikazi. Okunye ukuhlukumeza kwenza kube njengowesifazane "obala." Ikakhulukazi ekhanga owesifazane onjalo yindoda ephupha ukudlulisela umthwalo wemfanelo ezindabeni zomndeni kubantu besifazane futhi idinga ukubusa kwabafazi. "I-Reporter" ingokwalabo besifazane abangakwazi ukuthatha umyeni wakhe ngaphandle komndeni.

Kodwa iphupho lomuntu wonke namanje "lingowesifazane weqiniso". Akasoze adilika kuze kube sezingeni elithi "simpleton" futhi ahlukumeze noma yikuphi "abahlukumezi" abaphikisana nenkani nomyeni wakhe. Uzoletha ekuphileni komuntu imibala ehlukahlukene, ukuphelela nokusho. Owesifazane onjalo uyaphupho lendoda yonke. Lapho ehlangane naye, indoda ingasho ngokuziqhenya ukuthi ukuphila kwaphumelela. Futhi kunjalo ngempela. Kusukela kulabo besifazane, amadoda ahamba kakhulu kakhulu, futhi ngenxa yalokho, ngenxa yobuwula bawo, noma ngenxa yokuthi owesifazane akafuni nje ukumgcina eseduze naye.

Yiqiniso, akubona bonke abesifazane abangaba "abesifazane beqiniso". Kodwa ungakhathazeki ngokungahambisani kwakho ngezinga eliphezulu. Kungcono ukugxila ekuqedeni ukugxila komuntu ngamunye, ngakho-ke uzokuzondla kancane kancane ephusheni lembongi.
Kodwa konke okufanayo, yini okumele ifundwe owesifazane ukuze indoda yakhe ingasuswa?

Okokuqala, kwengqondo yesilisa, futhi okwesibili - ubuciko bokukhohlisa. Into eyinhloko okudingeka uyenze lapha kuqala ukuthi ikhono lokubukeka lihlukile njalo: hhayi nje ngaphandle, kodwa futhi ngaphakathi. Wonke umuntu amaphupho aphile, uma owesifazane oyedwa, okungenani owaziyo ukuthi uhlukile kanjani. Owesifazane onjalo njalo ufuna ukunqoba futhi abambe eceleni kwakhe, akalokothi abe nesithukuthezi, futhi ukuzondla naye cishe akunakwenzeka. Ngezinye izikhathi angase abe i-bitch, ngezinye izikhathi alula, ngezinye izikhathi abe intatheli - ehlukile njalo, futhi kusukela kulokhu ekhangayo futhi ekhangayo. Abesifazane kudingeka bakhumbule ukuthi ukukhanya okubonakalayo ekukhulumisaneni nomuntu ekugcineni akufanele ngaso sonke isikhathi. Noma yimuphi umuntu, ngisho nokulungiswa nokuphelele, uqhekeke phakathi kwesifiso sokunqoba umuntu kanye nesidingo somlingani ohlala njalo. Yikuphi ukuphikisana futhi ujabulele i-razluchnitsy, ngakho-ke kungani ungacabangi ngalesi sikhathi somqondo futhi ufunde ukusebenzisa lapho ukhuluma nomuntu othandekayo umkakhe osemthethweni?

Othandekayo besifazane, zama ukugcina umshado wakho, ulethe kuwo izakhi zengqondo ezintsha nezamnandi. Kulokhu, amadoda akho ngeke ahambe "ngakwesokunxele", kodwa azobonga ngempela lokho anakho. Isimo sengqondo esihle, ihlaya elihle, ukwamukelwa kanye nokushintsha indima kunganciphisa kalula isivunguvungu emgodini wamanzi-izingxabano zomndeni manje ezivela emindeni, kubonakala sengathi zivela ekuqaleni.

Futhi uma kwenzeka okwenzeka kakhulu - naphezu kwakho konke okuyikho (izinguquko zezithombe, izitsha okumnandi, izingxoxo ezithandana nocansi ocansini), wanquma ukushiya, ungadli isimo. Madoda, afana nezingane, badlala ithoyizi elisha, qhathanisa namdala, bese ubuyela kulowo owenze ngcono. Kodwa ingabe lokhu "ukucwaninga othandweni lweqiniso" kuwufanele izinyembezi zakho, izinzwa zakho futhi uziphindiselele ube umfanekiso ophefumulayo futhi ongaqondakali wephupho elingenakwenzeka? Mhlawumbe indoda yakho ingakavuthi futhi ayifunde ukuqonda isimo sakho sengqondo kuye namandla asebenzayo angokomoya?