"Ngifuna ukushada!" - Amantombazane eneminyaka engu-20 aphupha. "Kuyisikhathi esihle sokushada!" - khathazeka mademoiselle oneminyaka engu-30 ubudala. "Bashadile ngokuphuthumayo!" - besifazane abaneminyaka engu-40 ubudala. "Bashadile ..." - badla ngokuzumayo abesifazanekazi abaneminyaka engu-50-60 ubudala. Isifiso esingenakuqhathaniswa besifazane ukuba sibe phakade esiboshelwe izibopho ze-Hymen sisebenza nganoma yisiphi isikhathi. Kodwa uma abathandi abasha bephupha amaphupho omshado womshado, abesifazane abavuthiwe baqondiswa ukulinganisa okungokwemvelo (iwashi lezinto eziphilayo) nokuqaphela abesifazane (ngingumfazi). Namuhla, abesifazane abangashadile abaneminyaka engu-20 ubudala kuthiwa bayakwazi ngokwanele, futhi emashumini ambalwa eminyaka edlule umphakathi wawuzobeka inhlamba yokuhlambalaza: "Umama Omdala!"
Ikhulu liye lashintsha - liye lakhululwa kakhulu, ukuziphatha kuye kwashintsha - baye bakhululeka ngokukhululekile, kepha abesifazane baqhubeka bezwakala i-alamu uma indandatho yabo eyigugu ingabonakali ngomunwe wabo ngesikhathi. Kungani "zonke izintombi zibambisene", nakuba zingenakuzikhethela kakhulu, azifani ngokuhlakanipha futhi azikhanyisi ngobuhlakani? Lo mbuzo ubuzwa yizigidi "zamantombazane asekude" afuna izizathu kubo, emadodeni, noma ngisho nenkohlakalo neso elimbi. Ukuqeda ukuphazanyiswa okungenangqondo, ubandlululo nezinkolelo-ze kubizwa yizengqondo zengqondo ezazifundela "umqhele wokuqasha". Basikisela ukuhlaziya ukungafani kokuziphatha kwabesifazane, amadoda angabizi ehhovisi lika-registrar, nokuthola ukuthi kungani bezama ukushada bodwa, kanti abanye ngeke bathathe abafazi abavumelekile?
Amakhosikazi "
Le ntombazane, yakhuliswa ngezinganekwane zama-princesses, bese ivela kumafilimu othandanayo mayelana novelando lwabesifazane nabesifazane, ngokuvamile liba ngumthendeleli we "model" yobuhlobo. Ulindele isikhulu, ozoyilandela ngehhashi elimhlophe, iMercedes noma indiza bese emyisa eMbusweni okude. Iminyaka ihamba phambili, isikhulu sidabula impilo ye-labyrinths, futhi indodakazi yenkosi iyaqhubeka yokwakha isakhiwo esinamandla esingenakulinganiswa, esilondolozwe ngezandla zakhe ezithandwa ngezandla, izifiso, ukuzithuthukisa okungenasiphelo kanye nezicelo ezikhukhumezayo kubafaki bezicelo ngenhliziyo nangenhliziyo. I-crux yale nkinga: Ikhosana iqinisekile ukuthi uma kukhona owesifazane ohle (okungukuthi, yena), khona-ke kukhona endaweni enhle umuntu ngamunye. Ulokhu ezama ukufanisa isikhulu esicabangela konke ukuphila kwakhe, ngokungafanele akholelwa ukuthi uma ehlala ephelele kakhulu, uthola amathuba amaningi emakethe yezinto ezithandwayo. Kodwa-ke, ukwandisa "intengo" yayo, owesifazane onjalo uphendukela "into" ekhethekile futhi ebizayo kuphela engxenyeni encane kakhulu "yabathengi" abangakwazi ukuyikhokhela.
Isixazululo salesi simo: Yiqiniso, ungasheshi ukudlula futhi unciphise ibha ukuze "uthanda bonke abesifazane abavamile." Kodwa izinkolelo zisadingeka ukuba ziphinde ziphinde ziqale ukusebenza. Okokuqala, thatha isinyathelo ngezandla zakho bese ushiya inqaba yakho. Okwesibili, ukwandisa umbuthano wezithakazelo nokuvakashela kaningi lapho kukhona khona "izikhulu" ezingenzeka. Futhi, okwesithathu, ukuvumelana nomuntu ojwayelekile, kodwa othembisayo, futhi uthuthuke emigodini yobukhosi ndawonye.
Ama-Amazoni anokwanele
"Ngifuna ukushada, ngifuna ukushada!" Ungesabi, ngizokhokhela konke! "Amazwi omculo odumile abonisa amaqhinga abesifazane abaningi banamuhla, abazama ukungashadi, kodwa ukushada nomyeni wabo wesikhathi esizayo. Yonke into ayenazo: indlu - indebe egcwele, nomsebenzi ophethe izintaba eziqothukile, nesimo sezingonyama zezwe. Kuphela ekuphishekeleni ukwaneliseka ukuthi bavakashele ngokunganaki ukuvakashelwa, bephule izinhliziyo ngothando, futhi manje kufanele baqambe inkululeko yokuzijabulisa. Amadoda, eqinisweni, ahlonipha ama-Amazons, kodwa ungashadi labo "abaziphethe ngamadevu." Okuyinhloko yenkinga: Imvelo yanikeza lo muntu amandla, isimo somvikeli, umsizi, futhi wamnika umsebenzi wokunakekela umndeni. Owesifazane ongenza konke, yena uzohlonipha njengomlingani olinganayo, kodwa i-altare lizohamba nomunye. Ngomunye ozokwenza ukuba aqaphele amandla akhe emvelo, okuzodinga usizo lwakhe, futhi eduze nokuthi uzozizwa engumuntu onjani ngempela.
Isixazululo salesi simo: I-Amazon, ephupha ngokushada, kuzodingeka ixazulule indima "yentamo". Inhloko ebuhlotsheni kufanele ibe yindoda njalo! Nokho, akudingeki wazi ukuthi intamo ilawula ikhanda lakhe. Uma owesifazane wase-Amazonian enamandla ngokwanele futhi ehlakaniphile ngokwanele ukuze aphumelele, khona-ke kufanele kube ngokwanele ukuze ube nokuhlakanipha okukhulu.
Ama- "amakati"
Abesifazane abakholelwa ukuthi amadoda aphuza ukushada kuphela ngokocansichka ocansini - ukuphutha ngokujulile. Izazi zengqondo, ukuxoxisana "akukho mizuzu emihlanu" yamadoda, zathola ukuthi kuphela amadoda angama-20% abaxoxwa nabo, achaza abashade nabo, okuthiwa ngokobulili kubaluleke kakhulu. Bonke abanye babone omama kuqala ukuthi zonke izici zabesifazane abazithandayo: ezomnotho, ezinakekelayo, ezinomusa, ezinokwethenjelwa, ezithembekile, njll Kuyaphawuleka ukuthi ngaphezu kwengxenye yabo banquma ukushada ngemuva kokukhetha kwabo kuvunyelwe izihlobo eziseduze. Akunzima ukuqagela ukuthi akunakwenzeka ukuthi abazali, bebona umalokazana, bephupha ngokubona ibhomu locansi eceleni kwendodana yabo, kulandelwa intamo nokudonsa komuntu kusuka ku-16 kuya ku-96. Okuyinhloko yenkinga: Ngokuphambene nenkolelo evamile, amadoda akhetha ukuthatha amahle, kodwa hhayi abesifazane besifazane. Ngaphandle kokuqonda, umyeni wesikhathi esizayo ufuna ukuqinisekisa ukuthi umkakhe uzohlala ethembekile kuye, futhi uzofundisa izingane zakhe. Ngaphezu kwalokho, abesifazane abajabulela ukuthandwa kakhulu kwamanye amadoda, angacabanga ukuthi uyakhanga kakhulu ukuhlala naye isikhathi eside.
Isixazululo salesi simo: Uma owesifazane enamafomu athile, ngakho-ke, akufanele afihle ubuhle obunjalo ngaphansi kwesihenqo. Kodwa kungcono ukubeka zonke izidakamizwa nezidakamizwa zomzimba wesifazane ngezembatho ezinhle kakhulu ezingagcizelela ukuxilongwa, futhi hhayi ukuveza ukungcola. Owesifazane weqiniso udukisa indoda ngezintelezi ezihluke ngokuphelele!
Abashadile "abangunaphakade"
Akumangalisi, kodwa abangashadile yibo besifazane ababonakala sengathi sebevele benomunye unyawo ehhovisi lokubhalisa. Kungamakhosikazi omphakathi. Gcwalisa ngokuphelele umngcele weNdlu Yomshado futhi ube ngumnikazi wendandatho yomshado abacindezelwa ukuthobeka, i-conservatism noma isineke esingalungile. Ucwaningo lwama-psychologists ofanayo lubonisa ukuthi ukulinda isinyathelo esivela emadodeni akuthembeki kakhulu. Imishado yomshado iqeda ngomshado, uma isinyathelo sithathwa ngabesifazane ngokwabo (ngokucacile noma ngokucacile). Futhi, izibalo ziphikisa ukuthi amathuba okuba nobuhlobo obusemthethweni nomuntu ovumile ukuba "baphile ndawonye" izikhathi ezingaphezu kwesisodwa, wehla ngokushesha. I-crux yale nkinga: Kubantu, umshado womphakathi ngokuvamile uyisitoko, lapho kungcono ukulindela lowo ozosinika kokubili isandla sakhe, nothando, nomkhankaso ngaphansi komqhele. Abafazi bezombusazwe kuleli cala baba yizisulu zenkolelo edalwe, lapho ukuhlala khona kuhlanganisa isiqinisekiso sesitembu kule pasipoti. Indoda, ngokuqaphela noma engaqapheli, ayifuni ukubhalisa ubudlelwano, kucabangela umshado izinga eliphakeme lezibopho.
Isixazululo salesi simo: Ngaphambi kokuba wamukele ukunikezwa komuntu ukuba aphile ndawonye ngaphandle komshado, owesifazane kumele abale ukuthi amathuba omshado nalendoda, nokuthi ngabe isipho sokushada sizolandela. Uma kungenjalo, kunengozi enkulu yokugcwalisa lezo zibalo, okusho ukuthi emva kweminyaka emihlanu yokuhlala ndawonye, amathuba okuba ngumlingani ayancishiswa kakhulu, futhi emva kweminyaka eyisikhombisa-zero.