Intombazane ngayinye ibeka imigomo ethile empilweni yakhe. Ngokuvamile, konke kuqala ngomuntu othandekayo, khona-ke indoda ethandekayo, izingane, umsebenzi kanye nezinye izinto. Empeleni, isithombe sicacile, cishe bonke banenhlanhla efanayo ebalulekile. Akukhona kuphela ukuba nakho konke lokhu, kubalulekile ukuthi konke lokhu kube ngokoqobo, kuyiqiniso, kuyigugu. Khona-ke ngeke kudingeke ukuba usebenzise umbuzo, obizwa nge-psychology: umndeni ojabulayo. Ngemuva kwalokho, ngokuvamile ekuphileni kunzima kakhulu kunezincwadi.
Naphezu kokuba zonke izinkinga zomshado zingase zikhona futhi zilale cishe wonke umndeni wesithathu, kodwa imindeni ejabule ikhona futhi ikhona. Njengoba ingqondo ye-psychology ithi, umndeni ujabule ngezindlela ezahlukene, ngenxa yokuthi imindeni ihluke ngokuphelele. Ngesikhathi esifanayo, injabulo ibonakala ngokulinganayo. Kungenzeka yini ukutadisha izibonakaliso zomshado womshado okhona kulo mshado ojabulisayo? Uma kunjalo, kuzocaca ngokushesha ukuthi yiziphi izinyathelo okufanele zithathwe. Ingabe ufuna ukuchitha imali ngezinto ezingamangazi, kodwa kumuntu othandekayo, futhi uye kumngane womngane wakho, ngisho noma ungafuni ukwenza kanjalo? Nonke nenza okudingayo! Umshado wakho ngeke nje ube yisikhathi eside, kodwa futhi unamandla. Umndeni ojabule ngempela awukuthandi ukuhambisa oshade naye, noma ukulalela okuphelele. Izinhlelo ezihlangene nezithakazelisayo, amaphupho ayigugu, noma ukuphumula - yizikhathi ezibalulekile zokudala umndeni omuhle nobungane.
Ukuphila ngaphandle kwamazwi.
Ngokusho kwengqondo, umbhangqwana oshadile ojabulisayo ungumbhangqwana lapho kungekho muntu ohlambalaza ngamazwi. Kodwa lokhu akuwona uhlu lonke. Ubuhlobo bomlingani oshadile bufudumele, ngaphandle kwalokho, bahlala njalo isikhathi eside, ukwenza noma yikuphi ukuphawula kudinga kahle. Bobabili abashadile kufanele babe uhlobo oluthile lweziphakamiso. Ingabe ufuna ukugxeka? Kungcono ukwenza lokhu ukuze i-addressee ephikisanayo ingacasuli, ikakhulukazi ngokweqile. Inkulumo yokunganeliseki kwakhe okukhulu, noma ukugxekwa, ukugxeka okungaphezu kokumangalelwa, amazwi angaphazamisa konke. Akungcono neze ukuhlambalaza oshade naye, nokumkhathaza, ukumzwela, kuyafaneleka nakakhulu. Ngemuva kokukhuluma okubi, indoda yakho ngeke ihlanganiswe nomzamo omkhulu ngangokunokwenzeka, ukuze othandekayo wakhe angadabuki, ikakhulukazi ekhala.
Ukwabiwa kwesabelomali.
Esinye sezizathu ezengeziwe zokukhathazeka komndeni kungumholo. Oshade naye uchitha okuningi, kodwa umyeni wakhe uthola kancane. Kungcono ukusabalalisa ngokuhlanganyela nangokuthula, ngaphandle kwamazwi amakhulu, ukuze imali ingabi yinto yokwahlukana kwakho. Ukuze uhlangabezane nobunzima bezezimali, imindeni ejabule ingakwazi ngokuphelele, kodwa kubalulekile ukuyixazulula ngokulingana ngangokunokwenzeka. Ukuze kugcizelele ukunakekelwa okuyinhloko kulabo abangakwazi nokuthi bangakanani abathola, akudingekile. Imali ifika kwisabelomali esihlangene, iya emndenini omuhle. Ngokwemvelo, indoda ayikwazi ukuhlala ekhaya, ngenkathi ingenzi lutho, noma umfazi akakwazi ukuwachitha kakhulu. Kubalulekile ukuxhumanisa izenzo zabo ngezenzo komunye nomunye, ngenkathi kubonisa ukwethembeka.
Indoda ingumngane omkhulu kakhulu.
Umfazi kungcono ukucabangela hhayi kuphela umthandi omuhle, noma umtholi, kodwa futhi nomngane omuhle. Isimo sengqondo esihle kumlingani sakhiwa yimindeni ejabula kakhulu. Isazi sokusebenza kwengqondo esidumile okuthiwa uJohn Tottman sifike ebufakazini bokuthi isisekelo sobuhlobo obuhle bomndeni sibonakala singabangane. Akudingekile ukuba usebenzise imithombo yangaphandle ukuze uqonde lokhu. Futhi ukuhlakanipha kwabantu kusho ukuthi awukwazi ukusika ubungane obuqine kunoma iyiphi i-ax. Ukuphikisana akulona futhi ububele ngobulili ebuhlotsheni obuqinile, kanye nobuhlobo bomndeni. Empeleni, kufana nokuvimbela ubungane. Ukuhleka phezu komngane, noma ukudlala naye, ngisho nokudalula izimiso zakhe eziyinhloko kuyadingeka.
Injabulo ebusweni obuseduze.
Umbono wokuthi uma ubulili abukho konke okuhlukile, kubalulekile ukushaya i-alamu yangempela, noma ukuthi umndeni awujabule, kuvele khona phakathi kwemibhangqwana. Ososayensi bathambekele ekuqinisweni lokuthi uma laba abashadile bengavumi ukushintsha izikhundla zabo zocansi, singasho ukuthi banelisekile ngabo bonke lobuhlobo obuseduze. Ungazama izindlela ezintsha nokuhlola. Ingabe abantu bathandana ngenkathi benakekelana? Ngakho ubulili angeke kube umsebenzi ojwayelekile. Owesifazane onengqondo kufanele akwazi ukuletha ukujabulisa komlingani, nendlela yokuziphatha emphakathini noma ekhaya. Ukunciphisa oshade naye akuvunyelwe. Ungakwazi, isibonelo, insimbi iso, ngenkathi uthumela izinwele. Lokhu kuziphatha kuzokutshela ngokuzethemba kowesifazane, ukuthembela ebuhlotsheni bakhe nobuhle bakhe.
Khuluma nomunye nomunye.
Umndeni ojabulayo awukwazi ukuba njalo uma zonke izikhalazo nokunganeliseki zigcinwa ngaphakathi. Kungcono ukukhuluma ngezinkinga ngendlela encane kunokumemezela ngokungahlaziyi futhi ngokungenasici. Funda ukulalela umngane wakho womshado, ungaphazamisi. Ukuphikisa umuntu, uma ngokungazelelwe kukhona into engalungile, akufanelekile, kungcono nje ukunikeza iphuzu elihlukile lokubuka, ngokusho ngemiphumela engenzeka. Ukuthula akubangeli ukuhlazeka, kuhambisane nokumomotheka okumnandi? Lokhu kusho ukuthi ngomqulu wokubheka abashadile abajabulayo baqondana futhi ngaphandle kwamagama ahlukene. Ucabanga ukuthi kukhona ukuqonda okuphakathi komndeni wakho? Bheka indlela obabili abamba ngayo izandla. Ingabe iminwe yakho ihlangene? Kungenzeka ukuthi umndeni uvumelana ngokugcwele.
Jabulela nomyeni wakho othandekayo, othandekayo, othandekayo kakhulu. Futhi zonke izinhlobo zezinkinga zibavumele bakushiye futhi bahambe baze bakhohlwe indlela yokubuyela emuva. Futhi ngeke bakuphazamise wena nomndeni wakho ojabulayo.