Wathandana futhi ufuna ukuhlangana nomfana. Washiya ngokuphelele izifundo zakhe futhi ehamba emafwini. Akalaleli iseluleko somuntu futhi akafuni ukuqonda noma yini. Ngakho-ke, intombazane yakho iyaphuma futhi ayixhumani - yini okufanele uyenze? Indlela yokubhekana nale nkinga ngokufanele, ungalahlekelwa inhlonipho nokuzethemba kwentombazane, ungabi mfokazi kuye, futhi, okubaluleke kakhulu, ungabi yisitha sayo esisodwa?
"Kudingeka sicabange ngokutadisha, kodwa hhayi ukuphikisa uthando!", "Ngangilungiselela isikhungo sakho esikhungweni sakho, futhi ngingabheke abafana." "Akwanele ukugijima nxazonke ngezinsuku" - izinkulumo ezinjalo ezinhlanganisweni ezihlukahlukene kunazo zonke nokukhuluma, zikhuluma futhi zizokhuluma namadodakazi abo asetsheni, mhlawumbe bonke omama emhlabeni. Futhi amantombazane agijimela ngasese kubathandekayo bawo, futhi azobaleka, abaphoqe abazali futhi ikakhulukazi, omama, ukuba bakhathazeke ngabo futhi bangalali ebusuku, behlezi efasiteleni amahora.
Indodakazi yentombazane, ekwazi ukuthi umama ubona ubutha bemibuthano yakhe nabathandekayo bakhe, ukuhamba kwabo ngama-discos namaqembu, uqala ngobuqili, angenawo oxhumana naye, uphenduka futhi axoxe ukuze agweme ama-scandals kanye nokuhlambalaza kunoma yiliphi izindleko. Futhi uma uqale ukukhohlisa, kulula kakhulu ukujwayela ukukhuluma amanga, ikakhulukazi ezincane ezinjalo.
Ukwesaba okuvamile
Omama bahlale bezwa, kuyimvelo: lo ngumthetho wemvelo. Bafuna ukwazi ukuthi ubudlelwane obuphakathi kwentombi nesoka lakhe buhambe kangakanani. Kungani intombazane ihlunga okuthile ngaphansi kokuphefumula kwayo, bese ihamba igcwele ngaphezu kwefu futhi ayikhulumi nanoma ubani? Mhlawumbe babevele benakho, kuhle, akunjalo? Futhi kuthiwani uma intombazane ikhulelwe? Futhi uma emshiya, manje lokho osemusha! Futhi uma benquma ukushada, kuzobe kubi kakhulu, ngoba umshado phakathi kwezingane ezimbili, omunye angase athi, ngeke ahlale isikhathi eside, kuyiqiniso.
Ungaba kanjani? Ingabe kufanele ngimvumele ukuba amhlangabeze? Kodwa manje ubuyela emuva, akalaleli abantu nhlobo, mkhulu, uzimisele. Futhi ngokuzumayo uzohlangana, kodwa nje kuphela, kancane kancane, hhayi manje, umfana omuhle futhi ufuna ukumshada, futhi usevele uzibophezele kokungalungile, kanti intombazane idlula uthando lwangempela. Ikusasa, bala, phansi. Akudingeki ukuthi, imicabango efana nale - umthwalo akulula. Yebo, ukuba ngumama wendodakazi yentsha akuyona umsebenzi olula.
Okubaluleke nakakhulu, uma intombazane ngokwayo ifika futhi ixoxisana nezinkinga nezinkinga zayo ngesikhathi esinzima nawe, hhayi ngomakhelwane noma intombi. Ukuze kudingekile ngesikhathi esifanele futhi usondele ukuze angavumeli iphutha elingenakulinganiswa. Kodwa akubona bonke abanokuxhumana okuthembelayo. Futhi kulesi simo kufanelekile ukuziqonda wena imithetho embalwa ebalulekile.
1. Ungavumeli ukuxhumana
Kubalulekile ukuqonda into eyodwa ebalulekile: ukugxeka, ukucasula, ukuvinjelwa, ukujezisa akusizi ngalutho, ngeke kusize. Uhlala, kungakhathaliseki ukuthi uzokwenzani, uzoqhubeka nokumbona othandekayo wakhe, kodwa kuphela ekusithekeni. Futhi ngalesi simo umama uzoba ngumuntu wokugcina lapho intombazane eyokuthola iseluleko uma eyidinga.
Imibuzo yokulinganisa
Musa "ukuthola" ingane yakho ngemibuzo. Ngeke amenze abe obala futhi axhumana naye. Kunalokho, ngokuphambene nalokho, kuzosondela ngokwengeziwe nakakhulu. Musa ukugxila ekutheni imihlangano yabathandi abasha iphela ekubhekeni. Noma kunjalo, thatha isikhathi sokukhuluma futhi utshele indodakazi yakho mayelana nezindlela zokuzivikela, izifo ezithathelwana ngocansi, i-AIDS nemiphumela ehambisana nabo.
3. Hlanganisa ngaphandle kokuhlambalaza nokuqhathaniswa
Kungakhathaliseki ukuthi, lapho uxoxa nendodakazi yakho, ungasho ukuthi: "Uneminyaka eyishumi nesishiyagalolunye (iminyaka eyishumi nane, njll) ubudala. Luhlobo luni luthando eminyakeni yakho engaba khona? "Izingxoxo ezinjalo zokuzuzisa ngeke zilethe futhi akukho okuzoshintsha. Ingane yakho izoqala ukuhamba isuka kuwe usuku nosuku ngaphezulu nokuningi. Kuye manje isoka lakhe likhanya efasiteleni, futhi wena (kufanele ulivume) selifikile kumshini wokushisa emuva. Kulabazali kufanele ubekezelele. Futhi-ke, intombazane kufanele iqiniseke ukuthi uma iphoqelekile kuwe, awusoze wahlambalaza, futhi ungamangaleli ngalokhu.
4. Ungafundi izibalo
Ukuziphatha okulungile kakhulu ukumtshela ngemizwa oye waba nayo ngesikhathi sakhe. Phela, impilo iphinda yona, kuphela imininingwane eguqukayo. Yilokho, ukuthi ucabangani ukuthi kwakuyizinhlekelele futhi ngisho nokuphela kwezwe ekukhuleni, manje kubangele ukumomotheka, ukumangala noma ukumangala: ngingaphila ngenxa yalokhu?
5. Ungasheshi ukuveza umbono wakho
Mema indodakazi yakho ukumema umngane ekhaya lakho. Uma uthanda, kuhle, unganqikazi ukusho lokhu. Uma kungenjalo-ungasheshi ukuhlunga izimfanelo zakhe ongazithandi. Ungamtsheli ukuthi benzeni. Indlela engcono kakhulu yokuphuma ukutshela intombazane ukuthi umlingani wakhe ubonakala sengathi unjani, ngakho-ke, ake sithi, hhayi okungcono kakhulu, futhi ubuze ukuthi uyavuma yini nawe. Uma kungenjalo, vuma ukuthi uyamhlonipha ilungelo lakhe lokubuka. Izazi zengqondo ziphikelela ukuthi ngemva kwamagama akho, uzobukeka ngokungahambisani nomugqa omubi ngamehlo akho.
6. Hlonipha ubuntu bomntwana
Ungalokothi unikeze amahloni nentombazane ngoba nje ungathandi ukuzimela kwakhe. Kubonakala kuwe ukuthi useyingane, intombazane ngokwakhe ayicabangi kanjalo. Uzibona njengomuntu omdala.
7. Yiba umngane oqondayo
Vumela intombazane yakho ukuthi, uma kunoma yikuphi ukukhathazeka, angabuyela kuwe ukuze akusize, futhi ngeke umqede ngesisulu sezikhalo ezinjengalezi: Ngathi, waxwayisa, ngangesaba njalo ... Ngokuphambene nalokho, masiqiniseke ukuthi uzomsiza ukuba aphumelele iseluleko somuntu oseduze kakhulu, oqondisisa futhi onothando kakhulu emhlabeni. Lokhu ngeke kuvumele indodakazi yakho ukuba ithathe umhlalaphansi kumuntu osemusha futhi ungaxhumani naye, okwenza isimo singabi khona.