Phela, akusiyo isifubhe kakhulu ngenkululeko yokuzikhethela yomuntu, njenge-isanqante, eholela ezinqumweni zokuphila ezilula futhi ezijabulisayo kakhulu.
Lapha, ngokwesibonelo, thanda ama-triangles. Kusukela ekubukeni kokuziphatha, lokhu kuyindlela engavumelekile yobudlelwano phakathi kwendoda nowesifazane. Kodwa-ke, bambalwa abantu abakhumbula ngokuziphatha, lapho uthando luhlanganisa ikhanda, nakuba abaningi bezisola kamuva. Inxantathu yothando ingenye yezinhlobo ezingenakuqiniswa ebuhlotsheni phakathi kobulili. Izazi zengqondo zithi uthando lwabantu abathathu aluhlali isikhathi eside futhi luvame ukuletha injabulo nenhlanhla. Ngokuvamile, abantu abathathu abanezinhliziyo eziphukile, abaye bathola ulwandle lwezinzwa nezinkathazo, basheshe baphume. Kubesifazane noma amadoda afuna ubuhlobo besikhathi eside, imizamo yokujoyina ukulwa nomlingani osemisiwe kakade ayinangqondo. Lokhu akuyona neze indlela eya enjabulweni, kodwa abaningi baya kuye, bakholelwa ukuthi bangakwazi ukuvimbela "rake" okuye kwaqinisekiswa kaningi ngabanye abantu.
Izimiso zokuziphatha ebuhlotsheni phakathi kobulili zivame ukuhamba ngokushisa emuva, uma ziphathelene nomuntu ophezulu. Bobabili abesilisa nabesifazane abaye bafika ezindaweni eziphakeme kulo msebenzi, abacebile, abanjwe, abanezinsiza zeziphathimandla noma odumile, ngokuvamile baba izisulu zokuzingela ngokuthanda ukuphila okulula nokuhle. Akusilo ngalutho abakushoyo ukuthi indlela eya phezulu ikhumbuza enye indlela yokuya enesizungu: lapho uphakanyiswa phezulu, okuncane kusele kubantu abaqotho nabazinikezele. Ngakho akulula kakhulu abantu abacebile ukuthola umlingani ofanelekayo, njengoba kungase kubonakale. Emva kwakho konke, bavame ukuboniswa uthando nothuba hhayi ngenxa yabo ngokwabo, kodwa ngenxa yemali nokuxhumeka umyeni noma umlingani womuntu ocebile angakwazi ukufinyelela.
E-Russia yanamuhla, akulula neze ukugcina noma yikuphi uhlobo lwezimiso zokuziphatha. Emqondweni womphakathi manje konke kuphenduke phansi. Amantombazane angenalutho futhi angathandeki ngendlela yokuphila engenzi lutho azithola e-oligarchs anethonya kakhulu, kuyilapho abesifazanekazi abahloniphekile nabathandekayo behlala bodwa iminyaka eminingi. Abantu abaqashile nabangenasizotha yiziqhawe eziyinhloko zezindaba zezwe kanye nezigaba eziyinhloko zezindawo zokungcebeleka ezicebile kakhulu. Abantu abenza umsebenzi wabo kahle bahlala emthunzini. Kulesi simo akulula ukuhlala uqobo.
Ngezinye izikhathi uzama ukuphambanisa ukuziphatha, ukunyathela phansi ukwethembeka kwakhe kwekristall nokuqala konke okukhuni. Ngeshwa, akuvamile ukuthi kuyindlela yokuthola injabulo. Ukuwa phansi kokuphila okungahambisani nokuziphatha nokungcola kubhubhisa isimo sethu sengqondo kanye nesimiso semigomo yokuphila. Futhi imfashini manje ukugxeka nokwenqaba izimiso zokuziphatha ngokuvamile kuvame ukuphazamiseka kwengqondo noma i-neurosis, ukusabela okuvikelayo ezimweni ezimbi futhi ukungabi khona kobudlelwane obufudumele nanoma ubani. Kubaluleke kakhulu ukulondoloza umuntu ngokwakho esimweni sokuzikhethela kokuziphatha okunzima. Futhi ikakhulukazi lokhu kubalulekile isimo lapho ufuna ukufeza ukuzwana phakathi kobulili obuhlukile.
Isazi sefilosofi nesazi sokusebenza kwengqondo uWilliam James saqinisekisa futhi sahlakulela inkolelo yokuziphatha yokuziphatha nokuziphatha. Ngamafuphi, lithi "kunenzuzo yokuziphatha." Cabanga ngezibonelo. Mayelana nokungahlali koluthando ubudlelwano namadoda ashadile noma amatasa esiwashilo kakade. Kuneminye imikhuba yokuziphatha, ukwephulwa kwayo kungaholela ezinkingeni zengqondo. Isibonelo, kuyisiko kumuntu ukwenza isinqumo somshado, futhi owesifazane ngeke abonise isinyathelo kule ndaba. Noma kunjalo, eRussia amakhulu nezinkulungwane zemindeni zidalwa minyaka yonke ngesinyathelo sowesifazane. Ucwaningo lwabazali bezengqondo zomndeni lubonisa ukuthi lolu hlobo lomshado olungaguquki futhi oluyinkimbinkimbi. Uma umuntu ovela ezinsukwini zokuqala zokuphila komndeni uzizwa ecindezelekile ukwenza izinqumo zakhe, ngokuhamba kwesikhathi kuzoholela ekuhlaselweni, ukucacisa ubuhlobo, ukuhlubuka noma ngisho nokuhlukanisa.
Esinye isibonelo sihlobene nobuhlobo bezimali. Akuyona inkambiso yokuthi indoda ixhomeke kumkayo ngokwezezimali. Lokhu kubhekwa njengokuziphatha okubi, ikakhulukazi uma umuntu efundisa ngamabomu, hhayi nje isisulu sezimo. Futhi lolu hlobo lomshado luyiqembu eliyingozi. Ukungalingani kwezezimali, lapho umlingani ecebile khona kunomfazi, umshado oqinile futhi ophumelelayo. Futhi uma ukungalingani kungukuthi umfazi uhlale ecebile futhi ephumelela kunomyeni wakhe, yindlela eya ezinkingeni nasezingxabano ezinkulu. Iphesenti lehlukaniso phakathi kwemibhangqwana lapho umyeni engaphumelelanga ngokwezimali ngokweqile kunamabhangqwana anenzuzo elinganayo noma ngokuphakama kwezezimali kwamadoda.
Uhlangothi lokuziphatha lokungathengi kanye nomthelela walo ebuhlotsheni phakathi kobulili akufanele neze ukukhuluma ngakho. Lolu hlobo lwenkinga emqondweni wengqondo yomndeni lubhekwa "iphuzu lokungapheli" okuphawulekayo. "Iphuzu elingenakuphikisana" ngumcimbi noma umlayezo, emva kwalokho uhlobo olujwayelekile lobuhlobo luba nzima. Ngemuva kwakhe, ubudlelwane buvame ukuphuka, futhi uma begcinwa, bese behluke ngokuphelele. Kuyaziwa ukuthi umlayezo ngokungathembeki komyeni wakhe awukona nje okwazi ukubhubhisa umndeni, kodwa futhi wenza umfazi angacabangi. Ngesinye isikhathi abesifazane abasenqume ukugcina umndeni emva kokukhishwa, balahlekelwa ikhono lokuzwa i-orgasm. Ubuyela kubo kuphela uma kunesahlukaniso nokushintsha komlingani. Kodwa kaningi, emva kwakho konke, ukwehluleka akugcini nje ukuphula indlela yokuphila, kodwa kubhidliza umndeni. Futhi uma le noveli ingaseceleni, umthengisi noma umthengisi usenayo lapho angaya khona. Futhi kwenzeka ukuthi intando encane ibhubhisa ubuhlobo obuqinile, ngaphandle kwalokho okungukuthi impilo yomuntu ayifani neze. Futhi isifiso senjabulo emfushane siphenduka ukuhlupheka okuqhubekayo.
Into eyinhloko okumele ikwazi mayelana nobuhlobo bobulili kanye nemigomo yokuziphatha ukuthi ukuziphatha akuyona umthwalo obunzima nokugqilazwa kokugqilazwa kwabantu njengendlela yokubeka uphawu emkhakheni wokuphila. Yiqiniso, ungakwazi ukuhamba ngemuva komugqa bese wenza "uguqulwe ngokusebenzisa umugqa oqinile." Kodwa ngokuhamba kwesikhathi impilo ngokwayo iyokwazisa ukuthi ukwephula "ukumaka komgwaqo wekusasa" kuyinto eyingozi, engadingekile futhi engenamsebenzi.