Kungakanani okuye kwabhalwa mayelana ne-psychology yobuhlobo phakathi kowesifazane nowesilisa: ulwandle lwezincwadi, ulwandle lwamabhodi, kanye nenkinga yokwakha ubudlelwane phakathi kwabesilisa ocansini ihlala ihambelana. Kungani kunzima kakhulu ukuba sithole ulimi oluvamile nabesilisa obuhlukile? Singaqondana kanjani, futhi okubaluleke nakakhulu, samukele lokho esiyikho futhi singazami ukulungisa kabusha futhi sakhe kabusha umlingani wethu? Ukuba ngokwakho kuyinto yokunethezeka engatholakali kwabaningi. Kulesi sihloko, ngifuna ukuthinta kwesinye isici sobudlelwane phakathi kwendoda nowesifazane - ukwesaba ukuba ngokwabo.
Ngemuva kwalokho konke kwenzeka, ngakho-ke isikhathi sokuqala se-sweet-buketny siqala, okungukuthi, isikhathi sesoka sithandana nentombazane noma ngokuphambene nalokho (nalokhu kwenzeka). Siyajabula ngomlingani wethu: futhi konke okukuye kufana, futhi uyamangalisa kakhulu futhi omuhle, kahle, nje indoda noma owesifazane ohlelekile ngaphandle kwamaphutha. Kodwa kufanele siqale ukuphila okuhlangene, singene emshadweni womthetho, njengoba uqala .... "Angicabangi ukuthi ungumuntu ...", "futhi angingazi ukuthi u ...".
Kubonakala sengathi phakathi nemihlangano kanye nemihlangano sisanda kuba yimpumputhe, kanti umlingani wethu ubonakala phambi kwethu ngenye indlela yokukhanya okuhle kakhulu, asiqapheli amaminithi alo, sibona izinzuzo kanye nazo zonke izinzuzo.
Futhi konke lokhu kwenzeka ngezizathu ezimbili: owokuqala uluthando oluvuthayo, luthintela ingqondo futhi lwenza umlingani emehlweni ethu afanele, kodwa isizathu sesibili ukwesaba. Yebo, yebo, kukhona ukwesaba. Sifuna ukuthandana kakhulu kangangokuthi simane nje besaba ukukhombisa umlingani wethu zonke izici zendalo yethu, lapho, njenganoma yimuphi umuntu ovamile, kukhona kokubili okuhle nokubi. Ngokufanayo, sizama ukufihla izinhlangothi ezingalungile kusuka engxenyeni yethu yesibili. Umsizi wesikhatsi se-candy-bouquet uba nomusa, abapangi bayabanikela, abavilapha bayasebenza futhi baphuthele, izidakwa ziqine, futhi abaqambimanga bathembeke futhi baqinisile, njll. Lolu hlu lungenziwa ngokuqhubekayo kuze kube phakade.
Kudlula isikhathi. Izinsuku zomndeni ziba zivamile, futhi akukho nhlobo ekufihlekeni komunye nomunye. Yilapho siqala ukukwazi omunye nomunye ngomqondo ogcwele wezwi, futhi ukwehluleka kwethu kuqala ukuphuma njengedemoni ephuma ebhokisini le-snuffbox. Futhi ziphi, zibuza, sonke isikhathi? Yebo bekunjalo, besibe sesibazifihlile ngokucophelela, besaba ukubonakala bengaphelele ngaphambi kokuba umlingani, ngegama, bekwesaba. Futhi ngenxa yalokhu ukwesaba kwethu khona-ke kukhona izinkinga empilweni yomndeni. Ngenxa yakhe, khona-ke kunezinhlupho eziningi, izinhlawulo eziphukile, izinhliziyo eziphukile, ukudumazeka, imindeni engaphelele. Kungenxa yokuthi kunzima ngathi ngezinye izikhathi ukwamukela umuntu njengoba kunjalo. Ngemuva kwalokho, ngaphambi kwalokho asizange sibone ukuthi kuyini ngempela, futhi manje, ngemva kokuyeka ukufihla, wavele waba yedwa. Futhi ngokuvamile kunzima ukwamukela. Kubonakala kithi ukuthi lokhu kuhlukana kwabalingiswa, noma mhlawumbe uthando lwethu lwalukhuni kangangokuthi alukwazanga ukumelana nokuhlolwa ngokuphila. Kukhona izingxabano, izihlambalaza, futhi, njengamthetho, ezinkingeni, ngenxa yanoma yiziphi izicucu, futhi konke lokhu akuholeli ekuhle, kodwa ngokuphambene nalokho, kuholela ekuhlukaneni nasekuhlukaneni. Yiqiniso, angikwazi ukuphikisa ukuthi lokhu kwenzeka kuzo zonke imindeni, kodwa njengoba isipiliyoni sami sokubuka kompilo sibonisile, lokhu kwenzeka kaningi. Futhi lezi zibalo ezibuhlungu.
Ungakugwema kanjani lolu hlobo lwentuthuko? Konke okuhlakaniphile kulula. Yiba ngokwakho kusukela ekuqaleni. Yeka ukuba nobuqili ngaphambi komlingani wakho futhi, okokuqala, ngaphambi kwakho ngokwakho, ungesabi ukungamukeli. Phela, akukho abantu abahle emhlabeni. Sonke ngamaphuphu ethu ekhanda lami. Futhi izimangalo zethu komunye nomunye - isitha esibi kakhulu kunoma yiluphi ubudlelwane, ikakhulukazi ubuhlobo bothando.
Ukuqeda - kulula kakhulu ukwakhiwa, futhi ukwakha ubudlelwane obuqinile ngokuvamile kuthatha iminyaka. Noma mhlawumbe bekungeke kube yisikhathi eside uma besingesabi kusukela ekuqaleni ukuthi sibe yilokho - thina ngokwethu?