Khumbula ukuthi ungakwenzanga kanjani ukuzihlukanisa? Ujabule njalo umzuzwana owachitha ndawonye. Manje usebenzisa yonke imizuzu ukuchitha isikhathi esithile wodwa. Awudingi ukusondelana, njengokungathi othile udonse inkinobho ngomsebenzi "ubulili" kusuka kuphaneli yakho yokulawula. Umlingani wakho uphelelwe amandla futhi akaqondi ukuthi kwenzekani. Uyakhathazeka futhi, ngoba wesaba ukuthi kuzovela ukuphikisana nalesi sizinda futhi ubuhlobo buzophela. Ukuntuleka kwesifiso sobulili kuvela kuphi owesifazane? Futhi okubaluleke kakhulu - yini okufanele uyenze ngakho?
Umbangela 1. Isikhathi sokuhlushwa
Ukungabi nesifiso sokulala ocansini noma kancane kancane kwandisa isimo? Uma wakhetha lokhu okulandelayo - usuke ukhathele nje ngeso lengqondo. Ubulili buba "isibopho", isifiso sanyamalala kanye neminye imizwa. Usondliwe nje okwenzeka ekamelweni lakho. Uma izenzakalo zilandela njalo isimo esifanayo - wazi kusukela nokuthi yini ezokwenzeka ngomzuzu olandelayo. Kuyinto engokwemvelo ukuthi ukusondelana nomuntu wakho akukujabulisi. Kodwa-ke, njengomlingani wakho, oqonda ukuthi wayeka ukuba ngumthandi wakho omuhle.
Ngingayishintsha kanjani isimo? Ukuthula akuxazulula inkinga, ngakho-ke khuluma nomyeni wakho. Kodwa ngaphambi kokwenza lokhu, cabanga ngalokho okungakwenzela khona ngempela. Cabanga ngezifiso zakho nokuthi yini oyifunayo embhedeni. Uma ubona ukuthi awukwazi ukukhuthaza umlingani ukuthi ashintshe impilo yakho yobulili - kungcono ukubonisana nochwepheshe. I-sexologist izokutshela ukuthi ungavuselela kanjani izifiso zakho.
Isizathu 2. E- hormone ye-hormone
Uma ulahlekelwe i-libido yakho ngokuphawulekayo, ngemuva kwemicimbi ethile noma inkinga yezempilo - imbangela ingase ibe nezinguquko ze-hormone emzimbeni. Ngokwehla kwezinga lamahomoni athile, isifiso sakho sokulala ocansini sinciphisa. Mhlawumbe indlela yokuyeka ukuphuma esikhathini noma imiphumela emibi yezinzalo zokubeletha. Ngokuvamile futhi kuyisifo segciwane legciwane eligulayo, isibonelo, hypothyroidism. Ngakho bheka wena. Ingabe usazizwa noma yiziphi izimpawu zokukhathazeka? Mhlawumbe unayo izimpawu ezifana nokuya esikhathini ngokungavamile, ukushisa komkhuhlane, noma uhlushwa ngokweqile, ukukhathala, ukulahlekelwa kwemizwelo? Ngokuvamile, lesi sizathu asibi kakhulu. Isizinda se-hormonal singasulwa ngokusebenzisa ukwelashwa okuthile. Isimo esisodwa kuphela: udinga ukwenza lokhu ngaphansi kokuqondiswa udokotela.
Ngingayishintsha kanjani isimo? Ungakhohlwa ukuxhumana nomjozi wakho wezinkinga zomzimba bese umtshela ngezinkinga zakho namazwana akho. Udokotela wakho uzohlola izinga lakho le-hormone futhi anqume ukuthi yini okufanele uyenze ngokulandelayo. Uma imbangela yokuya esikhathini, uzocelwa ukuba ukhethe imithi efanelekayo yokwelashwa kwe-hormone. Kuzosiza ukukhulula izimpawu futhi ujabulele ucansi njengoba ngaphambili. Uma imbangela ingakhethi kahle amaphilisi okulawula ukubeletha, kungenzeka ukuthi inesikhathi esithile sokuyeka ukuthatha. Khona-ke kuzomele uphinde ubuyekeze. Ngalesi sikhathi, ezinye izindlela zokuvimbela ukukhulelwa, njengamakhondomu noma izisu zokuvimbela isisu, zingasetshenziswa. Kodwa-ke, uma kukhona ukusola ukuthi une-pathology ye-thyroid, khona-ke udokotela uzokutshela ochwepheshe be-endocrinologist.
Isizathu 3. Unendlela eyahlukene yobulili
Kumlingani wakho, ubulili kuyindlela yokunciphisa ukucindezeleka. Wayenomsebenzi onzima emsebenzini, ufuna nje ukuphumula. Kuwe konke okuphambene nalokho. Ubulili buqala ekhanda, futhi ngokushesha kuthinta isifiso. Ingabe usanda kubona okuthile okwenza uhlale esimweni sokucindezeleka? Lezi zingase zibe izinkinga zesikhashana emsebenzini, isimo sezimali esingaqondakali noma ukuhlambalaza umlingani. Noma yini engathinta ukungafuni kwakho ukwenza ucansi. Awuhlukanisi imizwelo evela ocansini, ngakho-ke uma ungenakho ukuthula nawe, ngeke ube nesifiso sokuthanda.
Ngingayishintsha kanjani isimo? Ungaziphoqeleli kunoma yini. Ngezinye izikhathi, kudingekile ukulinda. Uma isimo esicindezelayo sicacile, konke kuzobuyela emuva evamile. Ngokuvamile emzamweni wokushintsha okuthile uzokwenza kube kubi nakakhulu. Uma unomuzwa wokuthi i-libido yakho ihambisana nobuthakathaka obuningi, ukungabi nenjabulo nokungathandi ukwenza lokho okwakuthandeka ngaphambilini - thintana nesazi sengqondo. Asikho isifiso sokuba nobulili kwabanye abantu kusho ukubhekana nezinkinga ezinkulu ezingokomzwelo (ukucindezeleka, i-neurosis). Futhi uma ucabanga ukuthi awunakho okunye okusele, futhi ucabanga ukuthi kuyinkinga yakho - khuluma nomlingani wakho. Ungalindeli ukuthi inkinga iphele.
Chaza ukuthi kwenzekani
Kwabaningi besifazane, ubulili buyingokwenyama nangokomzwelo, kuqinisa ukuxhumana phakathi kwabantu ababili, indlela yokuveza uthando. Kubantu, kungukuya ocansini - ukuphumula, isenzo somzimba, akuxhumi nemizwelo, ayithwali ukuqinisekiswa kwemizwa. Ngakho-ke, cishe indoda yakho inzima kakhulu ukuqonda ukuthi yini oyifunayo, nokuthi yini ongayifuni. Ukwehluleka kwakho okungazelelwe kwesifiso socansi kungasabisa ngisho umuntu. Akakwazi ngempela ukuqonda ukuthi iyiphi inkinga.
Kubalulekile ukuthi ukhulume naye ngalokho okwenzeka kuwe. Owesifazane udinga bobabili abalingani ukuthola isizathu sokuntuleka kwesifiso socansi. Ngaphandle kwalokho kufanele wenze sengathi azikho izinkinga. Futhi, yiqiniso, ungaziphoqeleli ukwenza lokho ongafuni, ngoba lokhu kuzokwenyusa ukwedelela ukulala. I-libido yowesifazane ngezinye izikhathi ingenangqondo, futhi kubaluleke kakhulu ukuthola ngokushesha izizathu zokunciphisa kwayo futhi uqinisekise ukuthi konke kubuyela ekujwayelekile.
Ukunciphisa i-libido yisifo?
Eminyakeni yamuva, ukuxilongwa kwezinkinga zesondo zobulili zesifiso socansi sekube yisayensi. Ucwaningo lwamuva olwenziwe eWay State State University eDetroit lwabonisa ukungezwani kwezinqubo ezenzeka ebuchosheni besifazane okhononda nge-libido ephansi. Umlobi wocwaningo, uDkt. Michael Diamond, ubonisa ukuthi imbangela yangempela yinkinga yangempela. Ucwaningo lwesosayensi lwabandakanya abesifazane abangama-50 ababene-libido ephansi. Amarekhodi womsebenzi wobuchopho ayefaniswa nabanye abayisikhombisa ababesenenkinga enjalo. Abesifazane babebukele izinhlelo zethelevishini zansuku zonke, ezaphazanyiswa ngokufaka amafilimu ezamahlaya. Umndeni "wesifazane ongenenkinga" besifazane ungabona izinguquko eminyangweni yobuchopho obhekene nokuvuswa kobulili. Bonke abazange bathole izinguquko ezinjalo. Abesifazane abahlukunyezwa yi-libido, babengenayo imizwa.
Lolu cwaningo lunikeza ubufakazi bokuthi i-libido ephansi yisifo sabantu abazimele. Kodwa akubona bonke ochwepheshe kule nsimu abanombono ofanayo. UPeter Bell, ochwepheshe bezocansi, ukholelwa ukuthi ukungabi nokusebenza kobuchopho emifanekisweni engathandekayo yowesifazane olahlekelwe isithakazelo kwezocansi kungaba nezizathu ezahlukahlukene. Lesi sifo manje sibonakala njengesifo, kodwa asaziwa ukuthi kunesizathu esisodwa noma eziningana zalokhu. Ngokusho kochwepheshe, izici eziningi, ezivela endleleni yokuphila, izinkinga zomzimba, njenge-polycystic ovary syndrome, zingabangela ukulahlekelwa kwesifiso socansi kwabesifazane.