Yini ekhethekile kakhulu ngokukwazi nokwazi ukuthi ungajabula kanjani emshadweni futhi uvimbele ngempumelelo ukungqubuzana komshado? Okuhlangenwe nakho kobudlelwane obujabulisayo nesikhathi eside, imishado "yokuphila isikhathi eside," kubonisa ukuthi ikhono lokwenza izinto eziyekethisa lisiza ukuvimbela ngempumelelo ukuphikisana emndenini. Ngokuvamile, kuphakama izinkinga kulawo mindeni lapho "izigaba zethonya" zalabo abashadile abahlukana. Futhi kudingekile kuphela ukuqonda kahle ukuthi ubani, ukuthi yiziphi izimpendulo, ukuthi zonke izinto ziwela kanjani futhi ukuhlukumeza kususiwe. Ngakho-ke, kuwo wonke amasiko, ukunakekelwa kwekhaya nokukhulisa izingane kuye kwacatshangwa ukuthi ngumfazi. Umsebenzi kanye "nokumba izimayini," kanye nazo zonke ezinye izihlobo zangaphandle - umkhakha womyeni wakhe. Wonke umuntu unesibopho sendawo yakhe futhi akaphazamisi nabanye ngaphandle kwesidingo. Ukwenza ezinye izinto akuvunyelwe, kodwa konke okunye kufanele kwenzeke, hhayi ekulimaleni "kwendawo" yayo. Isibonelo, owesifazane angasebenza uma unesikhathi esishiye mahhala ekulawulweni komndeni nokukhuliswa. Ngisho noma owesifazane ehlanganyela ebhizinisini, uyaqhubeka ethwala umthwalo wenkampani yakhe. Uma engayifeza imisebenzi yakhe eyedwa, kufanele ahlele, isibonelo, ngokuqasha ingane noma ingane, eyala ukudla okulungiselelwe, njll. "I-Tug yengubo" iqala uma kungalazi abashade bomsebenzi wabo futhi bazama ukuphinde bafundisane.
Uma sizama ukufundisa kabusha umuntu, esikhundleni sokusebenza kithi ngokwethu, bese sizibeka esimweni sokuphakama ngaphezu kwesinye. Futhi lokhu kuyindlela yokuziphendulela nokuzibusa, ngoba izinhlangothi zombili zilingana emshadweni. Ezimweni ezinjalo, kunengqondo ukuzibamba nokuqonda izinto ezibalulekile. Iyini inani elibaluleke kakhulu kuwe? Ubani othanda kakhulu? Yini oyifunayo ebuhlotsheni? Izingxabano zizalwa ngokungaqondani uthando nokulindela okungalungile kumshado. I-egoism enkulu kakhulu ukulindela wena izinzuzo zomshado. Wonke umuntu unethemba lakhe, okungukuthi, njengoba umthetho, azivumelisi ngokwabo futhi adala izingxabano eziningi zomshado. Sifuna futhi sifune kusuka othandweni lomlingani kanye nenhlonipho, ngenkathi ukhohlwa ukungathandi ukuzinikela ngokwabo.
Asazi ukuthi singajabula kanjani, siqongelela izinkinga, asisebenzi emakhakheni ethu amabi. Imfihlo yenjabulo yomndeni ukunikeza omunye, hhayi ukufuna, ukubona omunye nomunye izimfanelo ezinhle futhi aziqonde, ukuze akwazi ukuthethelela amaphutha. Ubuhlobo bomndeni nabo badinga ukufunda, babasekele ngothando, hhayi ubugovu, okuzosiza ngokuphumelelayo ukuvimbela izingxabano zomshado. Noma imuphi umshado ungavuselelwa uma uyeka ukungabaza ukukhetha kokushade naye noma umfazi, qala ukuqonda umndeni wakho ngendlela entsha - njengenani eliphakeme kakhulu empilweni.