Ngaphambi kokuchaza ukungezwani kocansi, sizochaza ukuthi yini eyenza amadoda nabesifazane bahluke.
Amadoda athambekele ekuthandweni ngokushesha. Amaphupho abesilisa ocansini abonakala ngokuvame kakhulu. Kuyisici ukuthi amadoda angalokothi alaphule ngokocansi nabalingani bawo, futhi omkawo baphupha ngomyeni, noma amadoda ajwayelekile aya emaphupheni abo, kodwa hhayi abantu abangabazi.
Izikhalazo zabesifazane odokotela zikhulu kunazo zonke zamadoda. Imvelo isatshalaliswa ukuthi owesifazane unamandla kakhulu kunomuntu futhi uhlala njalo emqondweni. Abesifazane kulula kakhulu ukukhuthazelela izingozi, ukugula nokucindezeleka, kepha kunesibindi kunamadoda. Igazi lomuntu likhulu kakhulu, kodwa alinamafutha angaphansi kwesisu, ngokungafani nabesifazane. Ukuhlukana okubonakalayo phakathi kwamadoda nabesifazane ekucatshangweni okucatshangwayo kubonakala: emadodeni, indawo efanele yobuchopho isetshenziselwa ukuqondisa emkhathini, kanti ngakwesobunxele kunesibopho sokukhuluma. Azikho ukugxila ezinhlokweni zobungqingili besifazane.
Abesifazane bavame ukubandayo ezintweni ezingcolile zobulili ezingcolile, namadoda afana nawo. Injabulo yabantu ihamba ngokushesha, futhi ipholile ngokushesha kumlingani. Abesifazane bancane amathuba okuba bajwayele kunamadoda. Abesifazane baphila iminyaka engu-7-10 kunamadoda.
Ukubheka okunjalo okwehlukana phakathi kokuhlukana phakathi kwamadoda nabesifazane kunikeza izizathu ezigcwele zokuphakamisa ukuthi kunemibono eminingi ekushintsheni kwamadoda nabesifazane. Izizathu zokushintshwa komuntu zihlanganiswa yindawo eyodwa evamile: owesifazane oyinqaba kumbe owesifazane oyinqaba ukuphazamiseka kwemvelo, isidingo semvelo, njengokuphuza ubhiya obubandayo, into ongayenqaba, kodwa awufuni ukuyenza. Lesi yisici esivamile esingachazwa ngombhalo: "Singabantu, ngoba lokhu singakwenza."
Owesifazane angaya ocansini ngaphandle komzimba ngenxa yalokho okuhlangenwe nakho okujulile ngokomzwelo, ngoba ngesikhathi esifanayo uxhumano oluqinile lwangokomzwelo luyasungulwa.
Ngokuvamile, indoda inelisekile ngunkosikazi wayo, umbhede kanye ne-cognac efulethini amahora amabili noma amathathu. Indoda ivame ukuba nesithakazelo kuphela emzimbeni womlingani. Owesifazane udinga imizwelo ukwaneliseka okugcwele: amathiyetha, izimpawu zokunaka, izimbali, izipho, ukuhamba. Abesifazane kunzima, nakuba ngezinye izikhathi kuyadingeka, ukuba baneliswe kuphela ngemidlalo yocansi. Owesifazane udinga okuthile okungaphezu nje kobulili, ngaphandle kwalokho umphefumulo wakhe uba yindlala, futhi lokhu kukwaneliseka angayithola nomthandi wakhe.
Omunye umehluko phakathi kokukhashelwa owesifazane nendoda ukuthi yiziphi izinto eziningi zocansi abangakwazi ukuzixhumana nazo. Iqiniso lokuthi amadoda ashintsha kaningi. Kanti futhi ungahlangani nanye, kodwa abalingani abaningana. Ngenkosikazi eyodwa, uxhumana naye kaningi, futhi ngakwesinye angabona izikhathi, ngezikhathi ezithile. Inkosikazi yenombolo yesithathu ingabonakala embhedeni womuntu oshadile kanye ngonyaka, lapho umfazi ethatha izingane futhi eshiya ikhefu. Ngenkathi abanye behlupha indoda igcina iqeda, futhi enye ingxenye nayo. Ngenxa yalesi simo, izinduna zihlale zikhulu, futhi ngokuvamile zixhomeke esikhathini samahhala, inani lemali nezinye izimo.
Ngokungafani nendoda, owesifazane angaba nomthandi oyedwa kuphela. Uma kwenzeka behlukana nomthandi, khona-ke angathola enye, nakuba ngokuvamile ethola owesifazane, futhi uyavuma. Kunezikhathi lapho owesifazane angashintsha umthandi wakhe ngokwakhe, kodwa namanje uzama ukuhlala unomphela ezindabeni zangaphandle.
Owesifazane uyakwazi ukuhlala ethembekile kumthandi wakhe, kungakhathaliseki ukuthi kungalindeleka kanjani, futhi njalo ukhuluma ngalokhu, ngaleyo ndlela abonisa ukuthi uthembekile. Owesifazane angavame ukuziphatha nomthandi wakhe, njengokungathi ungumlingani ovamile. Kulokhu, angenza njengomlingani owenzela kokubili "emanzini" futhi "owomile" imidlalo eseduze.
Okubaluleke kakhulu, owesifazane akakhathazeki ngokuthi owesilisa wakhe angakwazi ukufunda konke, kodwa lesi simo esingathandeki esivela lapho esithintana nomunye umuntu ngumzwelo womuntu. Umehluko omkhulu ekukhakeleni kowesifazane ukuphinga komuntu, wukuthi owesifazane ushintsha kakhulu emigomeni yakhe, ahlala kuyo yonke impilo yakhe, hhayi nje umuntu othize (umfazi). Futhi emva kwesikhashana ukuhlazeka kudlula futhi isimo sokuziphatha sibuyela esimweni esijwayelekile. Futhi-ke lona wesifazane uba emjikelezweni womusha omusha. Umyeni manje kuye ungumuntu, njengobaba ngaphambi komshado, nomthandi - esebenza njengomkhwenyana osemusha. Futhi manje lona wesifazane ufihla izingane kanye nomyeni wakhe ngendlela ayezifihla ngayo uyise.