Bangaba nomzwelo, othandana, abanomzimba, abathandekayo nabathandekayo ngesikhathi se-candy-bouquet, kodwa badinga kuphela ukufeza ingxenye yabo njengoba imizwa ipholile.
Eqinisweni, lokhu akunjalo. Ngokuqondene nabesilisa nabesifazane, uthando luveza ngokuhlukile kakhulu. Uthando lomfazi luhloselwe emhlabeni wabantu, futhi lithinta kancane kwezwe lezinto. Futhi uthando lomuntu lubonakaliswa ngothando lomhlaba wezinto, hhayi umhlaba wabantu. Yiqiniso, kukhona futhi abaqhamuka obukhuni abahlala kuphela ngomsebenzi, futhi isidingo sothando sitholakala ngokuthandana okwesikhashana. Kodwa, ngokujwayelekile, bonke abameleli besilisa besilisa bangasho ngokuqiniseka ukuthi amadoda akhetha ukukhushulwa emkhakheni wezemisebenzi, futhi asebenzi ubudlelwano emndenini.
Kuye kwaba njalo kusukela ezikhathini zasendulo. Indoda eya ehlathini ukuzingela izilwane zasendle, ingase ingabuyeli ngokuzingela okunjalo. Futhi indlu yakhe yayilindele umfazi nezingane, ohlobisa imihume yasendulo ngamaqabunga, izimbali nezinye izinto ezifakiwe. Abesifazane basekuqaleni basebenze, kodwa umsebenzi wabo wawunengozi kakhulu futhi unomthwalo wemfanelo. Baqoqa amajikijolo kanye nezimpande, emva kwalokho bazinakekela izitshalo eduze kwendawo yokuhlala. Futhi basekela umlilo emgodini, ngoba ukuvutha okwakukhona esikhathini esidala kwakudingeka ukuqasha abapristi.
Manje, okwamanje, okuningi kuye kwashintsha. Kodwa-ke, izimiso eziyisisekelo zokuhlukaniswa kwezindima zomphakathi phakathi kwendoda nomfazi ziyahluka kancane futhi ezingenasici. Amadoda asenaso ingxenye engokomzwelo engathuthuki kahle yomphefumulo. Lokhu kubalulekile ukuze usinde ezweni elinonya lokuncintisana, ukuze ufike ezindaweni eziphakeme emkhakheni wezemisebenzi ezimweni ezikude nobungane. Izinhlanzi zangempela manje zithathelwe indawo emahlathini ehhovisi, futhi amadoda ahlanganyela ngokungathí sina ekusindeni kuleli zwe. Ikhono lokugcina ukuzithiba, ukuzinza ngesikhathi esibucayi, ukuphikisana noma ukuphikisana ngokuqondile kumncintisana wamadoda kubaluleke kakhulu njengokwazi komfazi ukugcina isimo sengqondo emndenini nasemsebenzini.
Uma ngezinye izikhathi ucabanga ukuthi kungani amadoda ekhetha umsebenzi, hhayi uthando, kufanele ufunde ukuthatha imithwalo yobuhlobo. Lokhu akusho ukuthi udinga ukuthatha isinyathelo, ukubiza njalo nokuzikhumbuza. Lokhu kusho ukuthi uma kwenzeka impikiswano noma impikiswano, lona wesifazane unezindlela eziningi futhi azokuyixazulula. Ngokuzimela, ngosizo lwabangani noma isazi sezengqondo, ungakwazi ukuhlukanisa isimo samanje, futhi kumuntu oza kakade enezixazululo ezihlelwe kahle, eziseduze.
Yini owesifazane okufanele ayenze ezwa sengathi uyasemuva kumuntu emva komsebenzi? Kunezixazululo eziningana eziphumelelayo zenkinga.
Okokuqala kudingeka ufunde ukubona uthando lomuntu, ukwazi kahle ukuthi ulubonisa kanjani. Uma owesifazane etshela umyeni wakhe ukuthi akamthandi, ukuthi akanalo uthando olwanele, uyazi ukuthi yini yokuqala umuntu ayicabanga? Uqala ukubheka nxazonke, efuna amehlo ukulungisa noma ukugcoba. Njengoba kukhulunywe ngenhla, indoda isho ukuthandiswa ngothando ngokunakekelwa induduzo yowesifazane wayo. Kwezinye izimo, indoda ingase icabange ukuthi owesifazane udinga ubulili obukhulu. Futhi cishe akasoze acabange ukuthi kufanele akhulume kakhulu ngemizwa, azincoma noma axoxe ngezenzo ezimnandi zezihlobo ezivamile.
Uma uthanda ukukhuluma ngemizwa, khuluma ngabo nabangani bakho. Lena enye indlela yokuxazulula izinkinga ezivela kumfazi ogama lakhe likhetha umsebenzi, hhayi uthando.
Futhi, ekugcineni, uma usadinga amazwi akhe okubonga nokusekelwa njengomoya, unganqikazi ukukhuluma ngokuqondile ngaye. Amadoda amaningi awakunzima kakhulu ukufunda ukuthokoza, uma owesifazane ecela. Mane ukhulume ngalokhu abadinga ngokuqondile, ukugwema amacebo futhi uhlasele ngokuntula okuthile ngokubaluleka kwalokho umuntu angacabangi ngakho.
Zonke izixazululo ezingenhla zezinkinga zikhona yonke indawo, futhi ziyasebenza kumadoda amaningi. Kodwa nokho kunezimo lapho owesifazane okufanele afune izimpendulo ezikhethekile kumbuzo othi kungani indoda ikhetha umsebenzi, hhayi uthando. Lawa angama-workaholism ngokweqile. Uma umuntu ehlala emsebenzini, uma echitha isikhathi esiningi sokuxazulula izinkinga kuzo zonke izisebenzi zenkampani, mhlawumbe ugijima ukusebenza kwezinye izinkinga emndenini.
Isigqi sesimanje sokuphila komuntu osebenzayo sigcwele kangangokuthi amalunga amaningi obulili obuqinile ahlala ekucindezelekeni okuqhubekayo. Ngenxa yalokhu, bangase babe nezinkinga emndenini. Akulula ukubuya ekhaya ukumomotheka uma nje uxabana nomphathi noma uxabana nomuntu osebenza naye. Ukuletha ekhaya isimo esibi, umuntu uthola izingxabano lapho, bese kuthi, ukuze angazwa ukuhlambalaza okuvela kumkakhe noma izingane ekhaya, uzama ukuza lapho ebumnyameni, kuyilapho wonke umuntu elele. Futhi ushiya ngaphambi kokusa, lapho wonke umuntu elele. Kulesi simo, kuyafaneleka ukuzwakala i-alamu. Sidinga ukuthola isikhathi sokukhuluma nomthandekayo wakho ngalokho okwenzeka empilweni yakhe enomoya ozolile, ngaphandle kwamehlo nezindlebe. Kubalulekile ukucinga futhi ngalawo maphuzu othintana abangela ukuvela kobudlelwane, ukusungula uxhumano olulahlekile. Ngokuvamile, lokhu kuhlale kukukhathazeka kowesifazane, futhi kuncike kuye kuphela ukuthi umuntu othanda umsebenzi wokuthanda angathola ukuthula empilweni yakhe.