Wonke umuntu uyazi ukuthi abesifazane bavulekile kakhulu kunamadoda. Mhlawumbe, yingakho omunye ebaluleke kunawo wonke umbuzo: kungani owesilisa esaba ukukhuluma ngemizwa yakhe. Akuyona imfihlo ukuthi owesifazane ngamunye ufuna ukuzwa amazwi othando kusuka okhethiweyo wakhe kaningi ngangokunokwenzeka. Kodwa la madoda ayathuli ngalokhu. Kungani lokhu kwenzeka?
Ukuqina komzwelo
Kungani amadoda esaba ukukhuluma ngemizwa yabo? Okokuqala, kufanele kuqaphele ukuthi ngokuvamile abafana abaqondiswa hhayi ngokwesaba, kodwa ngeminye imizwa. Akusiyo imfihlo ukuthi indoda ingaphezu komzwelo ngokweqile kunomuntu wesifazane. Yingakho nje kungaboni ukuthi kubalulekile ukukhuluma njalo ngemizwa. Omunye "ngiyakuthanda" kumfana uwanele ukuveza imizwelo yabo. Kodwa lokhu akwanele kwabesifazane. Ngakho-ke, baqala ukufuna okungaphezulu. Futhi, indoda ayiqondi ukuthi kungani intombazane yakhe ethandekayo ithukuthele, ifuna into ethile, ibuye idonsele intukuthelo. Ngenxa yalokho, le ndoda ingakwazi kakade ukukhuluma ngemizwa. Akafuni ukusho noma yini ukukhombisa lona wesifazane ukuthi uyisiphukuphuku nokuthi awukho lutho kanjani ukuziphatha kwakhe. Ukwehluleka okunjalo kokuqonda kanye "nempi yezocansi" ezingavamile kungaholela ekutheni lo mbhangqwana uzohlukana nje.
Ukwesaba isixuku
Kodwa akudingekile ukucabangela ukuthi njalo abantu abafuni ukukhuluma ngemizwa ngenxa yokuntuleka kwabo ngokomzwelo. Abanye abantu abasha bangesaba ngempela. Futhi lokhu kwesaba kuchazwa ukuthi amalungu amaningi e-sex strong anesimo sokuthi umfana kufanele abe njalo enobudlova futhi eqinile. Ngakho-ke, kwenzeka ukuthi umfana wesaba ukukhuluma ngothando kuphela ngoba engafuni ukubonakala emehlweni ebangane-obaziyo kanye nabesifazane bezinhliziyo banamandla futhi banokuqonda. Kulokhu, okubi nakakhulu, lapho insizwa isaba kakhulu imibono yabanye. Emva kwakho konke, khona-ke kuvela ukuthi ubuthakathaka futhi uthanda amandla. Kulokhu, le ndoda ingaphansi kombono wabantu, futhi kubantu abasha abakufanelekile ukulindela okuhle. Emva kwakho konke, lapho abantu bengenakukwazi ukuzimela ngokuzimela futhi babe nesibopho kubo, zonke izenzo zabo zizoxhomeka ezintweni zangaphandle. Ngakho-ke, awukwazi ukumangala lapho ephonsa intombazane ngenxa yokuthi othile unqume ukuthi ayihlangabezani nezidingo zalaba bantu.
Okuhlangenwe nakho okubi
Isimo esihlukile siqala lapho insizwa ingafuni ukukhuluma ngemizwa kuphela ngoba ibheka ubuthakathaka emehlweni enkosikazi. Izizathu zalokhu kuziphatha zihluke kakhulu. Ngokuvamile lokhu kwenzeka ngenxa yokuhlangenwe nakho okungaphumeleli namantombazane esikhathini esidlule. Isibonelo, insizwa isivele isavumelwane nomuntu othandweni, futhi lona wesifazane wasebenzisa imizwa yakhe futhi waphula inhliziyo yakhe. Noma emva kokuvuma kwalowo mfana wabiza ngokuthi ubuthakathaka no-lout. Kulesi simo, intombazane imane nje idinge ukuthi ibonise ukuthi imizwa yalomfana ibalulekile kakhulu kuye. Yiqiniso, umuntu akufanele athembele ukuthi uqala ukukhuluma ngemizwelo yakhe nemizwa yakhe, kodwa ngokuhamba kwesikhathi ungakwazi njalo ukufezekisa ukuthi umuntu ukhohliwe ngokuhluleka kwakhe okudlule futhi avulekele imizwa.
Esinye isizathu esenza umfana angakhulumi ngothando lwakhe ukukhulisa. Kweminye imindeni, akumane wamukelekile ukuveza imizwelo evulekile. Uma ubaba nomama bengakaze baveze imizwa yengane noma komunye nomunye, bekhulela, umuntu uqala ukuziphatha ngendlela efanayo. Kulokhu, lo mfana udinga ukukhuluma ngemizwa, uchaze ukuthi kubaluleke kangakanani, ukugxila ezintweni ezizobamba insizwa. Futhi ungafihli imizwa yakho emihle. Ngokuhamba kwesikhathi, lo mfana uzoqala ukuthunga futhi athathe imodeli yakho yokuziphatha, kancane kancane alahleke.
Eqinisweni, abantu abaningi baye bahlangabezana nezenzakalo ezenza bafihle okuhlangenwe nakho kwabo, imizwa nemizwelo yabo. Amadoda nje angakwazi ukuzinqanda kangcono. Ngakho-ke uma wazi ukuthi umfana uyakuthanda, kodwa akafuni ukukhuluma ngemizwa ngokuqondile ngalezi zizathu, vele ube nesineke futhi kancane kancane ukhombise le nsizwa, ngamagama nangezenzo ezibonisa ukuthi uyamthanda.