Imizwa yokwenqatshwa yedwa ivela lapho umuntu eqala ukuzwa ukuthi akanalo lutho, futhi ngeke akwazi ukuwuguqula. Futhi, lo mzwa ungavela uma umuntu kwezinye izimo enza into engalungile, kodwa angazi isinqumo esifanele. Ezimweni ezinjalo, umuntu akajabuli ngaye, nakuba engaqondi isizathu sokunganaki kwakhe.
Uma umuntu enenhloso yokuziqonda yena, usevele wenza isinyathelo sokushintsha isimo sakhe sengqondo kuye. Kodwa udinga ukuziqonda kahle. Uvame ukuzingela kanjani? Bafunda izincwadi ezikhethekile, bafuna uhlobo lwabo siqu. Zonke lezi zenzo zidinga ukuthathwa njengenqubo yemvelo empilweni yomuntu, isibonelo, ukudla noma ukuphefumula. Umuntu kufanele azenzele izinhloso zangempela hhayi zomhlaba kuphela. Emva kwakho konke, ngemuva kokufeza umgomo owodwa, omunye uvela, ofuna ukufezekisa. Ukuphila komuntu kufanele kube kuhle futhi kube nokuthula. Yonke inqubo kufanele ihloswe ukuthola ukwaneliseka emkhakheni wokuphila. Kodwa abantu abajwayele ukufezeka, bahlale bezihlupha ngemigomo engafinyeleleki, kanye nokusebenza kwabo okuhle. Basuke beqaphele ukungawuboni ubuso emdakeni. Abantu abanjalo kumele baphelele, bazokwenza izidingo ezifanayo kwabanye.
Noma, uma ubheka nxazonke, akukho lutho oluhle emhlabeni. Abantu abahle bakhuphuka nabo. Ngakho ingxabano iqala. Abanye, ukuze bathole ukuphelela, benze konke okusemandleni futhi kungenzeki, bahlukumeze, bahlasele futhi bazibize zonke izinhlobo zamagama. Lapho umuntu eqaphela ukuthi akaphelele, ufika esiphethweni sokuthi angeke athande futhi azamukele yena. Ngokuvamile kunokuba abantu abanjalo bazijabulise ngokwabo ukuthi uthando luzophelela ekupheleleni. Abaqondi ukuthi lo-self-love akafaki kuso izici ezinhle. Uthando ngokwakho lungafaniswa kuphela nothando lomama wengane yakhe. Umama uthanda ingane hhayi into ethile, kodwa ngenxa yokuthi unayo. Kulesi simo, akufanele kubalule ukuthi ungubani, ukuthi ulinganisa kangakanani, ukuthi ubukeka kanjani nokuthi uphumelele kanjani kulo mpilo.
Akunandaba ukuthi umuntu unomlingani. Uma umuntu ebeka imigomo ekahle futhi enganelisekile ngaso sonke isikhathi naye, lokhu ngeke kumsize aphelele. Ngaphezu kwalokho, ayimphakamisi emehlweni abanye futhi emehlweni akhe. Ukuze uzuze okuthile, kufanele ulalele ngokucophelela izifiso zakho kanye neqiniso. Ungakugwemeli okungalungile. Uthando, ungakwazi ukwamukela ngokuphelele. Kodwa okokuqala umuntu kufanele aqaphele lokho akufunayo. Kumelwe futhi azethembe yena nabanye. Futhi, umuntu angamethemba kanjani yena nabanye uma engenalo uthando?
Kodwa-ke, bambalwa kakhulu abantu abathandayo. Kodwa uma lokhu kwenzeka, umuntu udinga udokotela ngokushesha. Ngakho-ke, usuke ecindezelekile kakhulu. Kulesi simo, izinsizakalo zesazi sengqondo ngeke neze zimsize. Ngoba ukucindezeleka kuvame ukuphathwa ngokuhlanganiswa kwemithi nge-psychotherapy. Yini elele ngaphansi kwamagama athi "Angithandi mina"? Lokhu, okokuqala, ucingo olubhekiswe kwabanye abantu abakuzungezile. Le ndoda cishe iyamtshela abantu abathandekayo kakhulu ngokuzwelana nokuthandwa.
Ngendlela, iningi labesifazane liveza amagama anjengokuthi "bathande futhi bazamukele ngokwabo" noma "ukuziqonda." Lawa magama abesifazane basebenzisa ukuze bazuze amathuba abasiza ukuba bathole injabulo enkulu ekuphileni. Nakuba amandla abesifazane ukuthi ayesabi ukukhombisa ubuthakathaka bawo. Uma engakhululekile, ngokuqinisekile uzama ukushintsha okuthile empilweni yakhe, kanye nombuso wakhe ngendlela enhle. Ngokuvamile, okuningi kule nqubo kuxhomeke kumuntu. Kodwa abesifazane basheshe kunamadoda ukubona ubuthakathaka babo, nokuxazulula zonke izinkinga ukuze bafeze umgomo wabo. Yilezi zimfanelo owesifazane ophendukayo, abe namandla. Udinga ukuzithandela futhi uzamukele ngokwakho ngokulwa nawe, kodwa ngokumane utholakale emithonjeni yakho kanye namandla akho kuwe. Lezi zici kanye nokusiza ukufeza umuntu ukuze afinyelele umgomo wabo, okungukuthi ukwamukela, ukuqonda nokuziqonda.
Kubalulekile ukukhumbula ukuthi isizathu esiyinhloko sokuhluleka, ukungqubuzana nokuzizwa okubi akungathandi komuntu. Lesi simo siboniswa ngezindlela eziningi, ngokwesibonelo, ukuzitshela wena nomzimba wakho, ukuqhathanisa nabanye, ukunganeliseki ngomlingiswa womuntu, njll. Umuntu uvame ukuzikhukhumeza yena nabanye, futhi lokhu akunakwenziwa. Ngoba isimo sengqondo nesimo sangaphakathi somuntu asibonakali ngokubonakala kwakhe. Ngaphezu kwalokho, ekubeni nesimo esibi nomoya omubi, ungadonsela okubi kuphela. Umuntu onjalo uzozungezwa kuphela ngabantu abanjalo. Isikhathi sokuvula iqembu lezifundo ezinganelisekile.
Kuye kwaphawula isikhathi eside ukuthi uma umuntu eyazidumisa njalo, uzithumela imicabango emihle. Ekuphileni kwakhe, okuningi kuqala ukushintsha, futhi kube ngcono. Futhi, izazi zengqondo zincoma ukwenza ukuqeqeshwa okukhethekile. Lena uchungechunge lokuzivocavoca okubizwa ngokuthi "Amazwi ahloniphekile kuwe," Ukudumisa amazwi kwabanye "nokuthi" Dumisani kwabanye. " Ngaphezu kwalokho, kuzodingeka ukuthi uhlaziye bese uxazulula icala elibi. Ngenxa yalokhu, kukhona ukuvivinya okukhethekile kwengqondo okubizwa ngokuthi "Ukuguqulwa kwezithombe", okuqukethe izigaba ezilandelayo: incazelo yenkinga, ukudala isithombe, ukuguqulwa kwesithombe nokuqinisekiswa kwemiphumela. Noma kunjalo, ukuqeqeshwa okunjalo kufanele kwenziwe ngosizo lochwepheshe. I-psychotherapist enolwazi uyosiza ekukhoneni inkinga nasekusebenzeni izenzo ezifanele.
Kukhona futhi izinhlinzeko eziningi, isibonelo, ukuba nomusa, ukuphumula kaningi. Sidinga ukuzinakekela thina, ukugcina umbuso oqondile wosuku kanye nokudla okunomsoco. Sebenzisa noma yiziphi izinhlelo zokuqoqa amandla amandla. Yiqiniso, zonke izinsuku ukuya ngezinyawo noma ukugijima emoyeni omusha kusuka kumaminithi angu-30 kuya kuhora elilodwa.