Imfihlakalo nokungaqondakali kokuziphatha kwamadoda, njengoba uyazi, iqiniso elingenakuqhathaniswa ukuthi kunzima kakhulu ukuthi abesifazane baqonde. Ukuze ungene ekucindezelekeni, ukuzihlupha ngaphakathi ngaphakathi ngezinkinga ezihlukahlukene kanye nemicabango mayelana nabo, njengoba kuvela nhlobo, hhayi ukugunyazwa kwesifazane. Ngikholelwa, amadoda ahlupheka kakhulu kaningi. Ngokwempela, ngomthethosisekelo wabo, abawubonisi emphakathini, ngaphandle kokumemeza ngakwesobunxele nangakwesokudla, ukuthi lapha, bathi, ngine-streak emnyama empilweni yami nokuthi yini okufanele ngiyenze ngayo. Ziyimfihlo, ngendlela engcono kakhulu imizwelo yabo nemizwa yabo. Okubi kakhulu. Emva kwakho konke, lapho usuthole umhlaba wakho wangaphakathi futhi ukhuluma ngalokho okusikhathazayo kulula kakhulu kunokukufihla konke ekujuleni kwakho futhi uzama ukuhlala kanje. Amadoda abengeke athambekele ekuvezeni imizwelo yabo, efaka umphumela onjalo omubi kubo. Ukuze ube yindoda yangempela futhi ungalokothi ukhononde ngezinkinga zabo, isethwe phansi, kuzo zonke izimele zesilisa, njengesisekelo esiqinile, empilweni yabo. Ngakho-ke, i-credo eyinhloko yazo zonke izilimi, iwukuba umoya oqinile, ozimele, ofanele ukwamukela zonke izinkinga zokuphila futhi njalo ukuvimbela ukunganeliseki nokuzizwa kwabo. Futhi, ngenxa yalesi sizathu, njalo uzama ngawo wonke amandla akhe ukuze afane nalesi sithombe, ethwele konke okungekho ngaphakathi futhi angafanele aphumele kuye. Lona ngumbono wesilisa futhi akukho lutho olwenziwe ngakho, lusele kuphela thina besifazane ukulwa nalokhu. Wayengathanda ukushintsha into ethile, kodwa akakwazi ukuyixazulula ngokwakhe, esaba ukuhlazisa indoda yakhe "Mina". Futhi kuyo yonke imizamo yakho, ukususa kuye imbangela yangempela, ukuziphatha kwakhe okungajwayelekile, kungukuthi, kaningi, kuncike ekuchazweni okulula futhi okulungile ngesimo abathi, bathi, badidekile ngokwabo nangemizwa yabo. Futhi, noma kunjalo, uma umuntu ethi uboshiwe empilweni, ungamshiyi wedwa ngezinkinga zakhe. Kungakhathaliseki ukuthi kwakunjani, zama ukukhuluma naye futhi, mhlawumbe ekupheleni, kumsize ngandlela-thile, ngomqondo wokuziphatha wezwi.
Njengoba esebenzile endleleni yokulwa nokulwa nokungaqiniseki kwakhe empilweni, ukuthi ngesikhathi esifanayo uzoba nodonga oluphezulu lwamazwi ngeke lukhishwe. Yikuphi emasekhondini ambalwa, vula, ngqo, lo muntu ngokwakhe. Uzozama, ngosizo lwalolu donga, ukuzicima emhlabeni wonke futhi usizo lwakho kufaka phakathi. Akayithandi lapho owesifazane ezama ukungena emphefumulweni wakhe futhi ngendlela engcono kakhulu, egameni lokugwema, ucabangela "ukuphunyuka emkhunjini". Kuyafaneleka, ukwazi ukuthi abantu abaningi, abanokuthandwa okuphawulekayo, baqonda noma yisiphi iseluleko esivela eceleni. Lokhu konke kungenxa yokuthi iseluleko esibaphayo, ekuboneni kwabo kwengqondo, kuthathwa njengento engaphezu kokuhleka usulu nokulahlwa. Ngakho-ke, kunoma yikuphi, ungabeki iseluleko sakho kuye, kodwa unikeze, njengokungathi, ngengozi, nangendlela. Into eyinhloko ukubeka isithombe esicacile senkulumo yakho ngaphambi kwakho, ungababuzi imibuzo bese uvumela nje ukuthi ikhulume. Amadoda athande abalaleli abathokozelayo, ngakho-ke, amathuba okuthola, ekuthuleni komphefumulo wakhe, nokuthola ukuthi yini efihliwe khona, izokhula kakhulu.
Kodwa okokuqala, ukukulungiselela ukuba ube yingxenye yesazi sokusebenza kwengqondo wesilisa, ake sibukeze kafushane izizathu eziyinhloko ezibamba umuntu ngaphandle komkhondo wakhe wokuphila.
Bonke abalimi, ukuze ububi babo bungakafiki ekuphileni, ezingqondweni zabo zesilisa zijwayele ukuhlangenwe nakho okubuhlungu. Esikhundleni sokuba yonke into ihlelwe ngaphandle, uma kungenjalo ngezenzo, okungenani ngezwi. Zizihlupha ngokwayo yonke into eyenzeka nxazonke zazo. Kungakhathaliseki ukuthi umsebenzi, umndeni, abangane noma nje uthando olusha olulahlekile. Thatha okuningi ngezindleko zakho - lokhu kuyip counter yabo ethandwayo kakhulu. Futhi kungachazwa yilokho. Ukuthi yena, indoda yangempela, uzithatha ngokweqile. Ukucabanga ukuthi konke kungaphansi komthwalo wakhe, futhi uma kukhona okungahambi kahle. Uzibeka icala, ngokuzikhethela ngokwakhe, ukuthi akakwazanga, lokhu konke ukugcina ngaphansi kwemingcele ethile. Uzama ukuthola ukuthi uphinde wenza iphutha futhi, ngasiphi isikhathi, walahlekelwa ukulawula kwakhe ngokuqapha. Ngelinye igama, wayemane ekhathele ukuzibophezela njalo.
Noma kunjalo, izizathu zingaba ukungabonakali kwakhe njengendoda. Ukungaqiniseki ngokwezezimali, ukunganeliseki ngokwakho, hhayi ukugcwaliswa kwamapulani nemisebenzi ebekwe phambi kwabo, futhi okubaluleke kakhulu, ukuqala komugqa omnyama ngaphambili kwothando. Ngokuqondene nesizathu sokugcina, sivame kakhulu futhi simi ngaphezu kwazo zonke ezinye. Kuhlanganisa izici eziningi, ngenxa yokuthi le ndoda ididekile nje, ingaziqondi imizwa yakhe nezifiso zayo. Lokhu kungase kube ukukhathala kwakhe ebuhlotsheni obude, uthando oluzelelwe lomunye owesifazane noma nje umuzwa wokucabanga wokuthi lolu thando. Lapha, lo muntu, kunanini ngaphambili, ugoba ikhanda lakhe ngesivunguvungu sale nxantathu yothando, ezama ukunquma ukuthi ubani othandekayo ngempela kuye nokuthi ubani ofuna ukuhlala naye. Lapha siphinde sibhekisele eqinisweni lokuthi uvele waqala ukungabaza ukukhetha kwakhe, ukusondela kuwe futhi akakwazi ukuziphendulela umbuzo othi: "Ingabe ngempela ungumuntu ofuna ukuhlala nayo yonke impilo yakhe?". Noma mhlawumbe kunjalo nje, kungakhathaliseki ukuthi kuzwakala ubuhlungu kangakanani, ulahlekelwa othandweni. Noma nje ucabange ngesikhashana okwesikhashana ebuhlotsheni bakho.
Uma umuntu ethi uyangena empilweni, futhi ufuna ukumsiza futhi ngesikhathi esifanayo azikhulule ekuhluphekeni okubuhlungu ngokungaqiniseki okukhona, ungamcindezeli. Futhi uvele ukhulume naye, mnike isikhathi sokubona ukuthi uyakwazi yini ukuyiqonda noma ukumsiza kulokhu. Ngomunye, njengoba wazi, zonke izinkinga kubonakala sengathi ziyinkimbinkimbi. Ungaziphakamisi futhi ungamcindezeli uma enza isinqumo sokugcina, ngeke sisheshe siphume umphumela wesinqumo sakhe. Futhi okubaluleke kakhulu, noma yini ayengayithatha, yithathe kalula.