Ababili bahlangana, bajabulele, kodwa emva komshado kungase kufike ukuthukuthela, ukucasuka futhi, ngenxa yalokho, ikhefu. Kungani lokhu kwenzeka?
Kubantu abaningi, umqondo womndeni ofanelekile usekelwe ekubukeni okubulalayo nokungafaneleki, ngakho-ke, ukulindela kusuka emshadweni ongunaphakade, bathola ukuwa kuphela!
Abaningi, lapho bengena emshadweni, abaqondi ukuthi ubudlelwane bomndeni buyinto enhle kakhulu ngosuku nosuku futhi uthando olulodwa alukwazi ukuya kude. Ngaphambi kokushada, ngeke kube okungadingekile ukucabanga ukuthi yini ehlanganisa wena ngaphandle kwethando, kungakhathaliseki ukuthi unesithakazelo esifanayo kanye nokubukwa empilweni. Ukuthi ukuphikiswa okukhangwayo kuyimbono eyiphutha, ngoba konke lokho kusebenza esigabeni sokuqala sobudlelwane, uma nje ufundela futhi ukungaqiniseki kwakho kungenisa ukungavamile ebuhlotsheni bakho. Ngokuhamba kwesikhathi, lokhu kuzophazamisa kuphela, ngoba kuyoba nzima kuwe ukuthola amaphuzu avamile othintekayo. Ungathembi ukuthi umuntu oseduze nawe uyoshintsha izinto ezithandwayo noma indlela yokuphila - akunakwenzeka ukulungisa noma ubani. Kunzima ukucabanga ukuthi owesifazana wesifazane uzoya ezinkampanini ebusuku ngoba umyeni wakhe usetshenziselwa ukuphila ngendlela efanayo (noma ngokuphambene nalokho). Kungenzeka ukuthi umshado onjalo uzohlakazeka ngemva kwesikhashana.
Futhi lapha ngisho ucansi ngeke lusindise! Umshado awusekelwe kuphela ekuziphatheni komzimba, kodwa futhi ebuhlotsheni bemiphefumulo, ngakho-ke ubulili obuhle akuyona inhlawulo emshadweni, kodwa kuphela ukujabulisa okunamnandi nokudingekile.
Ungakhohlwa ngohlangothi lwezinto eziphathelene nobuhlobo bomndeni. Uthando luyothando, kodwa impilo engekho endlini ayinakwenzeka ukuba yingxenye yokuhlanganisa futhi noma yini ongayisho, isimo esimweni sezimali somndeni akubaluleke nakakhulu.
Ngakho-ke kuvela ukuthi uthando lwangempela ngaphambi komshado kufanele lubekwe, futhi emshadweni lusebenza kulo, luthuthukise futhi lufunde ukwakha ubudlelwane. Futhi uma sikhuluma ngothando lweqiniso emva komshado, ke into eyinhloko ukugcina ubudlelwane obuseduze: ukuthanda indlela ovame ukusebenzelana ngayo, kodwa okungenani ugcine zonke izinto ezinhle ozitholile ngesikhathi somshado. Lokhu okuhlangenwe nakho okuyigugu ongayikuthola kuphi, ngakho-ke thokoza ngalokhu kusigaba sakho sangaphambili!
Ungabuki uthando lwangempela emva komshado osemthethweni kulowo owaqhelile, zama ukugcina ubungane nokwethemba. Ubani owaziyo, mhlawumbe, kumuntu oshade naye, uzothola umngane onokwethenjelwa! Phatha lo mcimbi njengesinyathelo esilandelayo, emva kwalokho uzowunqoba hhayi nje kuphela okuhlangenwe nakho, kepha futhi nethuba lokuqhubekela phambili, ukuletha injabulo yakho. Futhi ngomthwalo wokuhlambalazana kokubili kuyoba nzima nakakhulu.
Futhi khumbula: into esemqoka akusiyo ukuthi lokhu kuyilando lweqiniso noma cha, ngaphambi nangemva noma ngesikhathi somshado osemthethweni - into eyinhloko ukuthi eceleni kwakho kwakukhona umuntu osondele eduze kwakho owafuna (noma ufuna) kube impilo yakho yonke! Yazisa lokho onakho, ukwakha ubudlelwane bakho, futhi ungathembeki ekupheleni kwesikhathi bese umbuzo wokuthi ngabe kukhona uthando lwangempela ngaphambi nangemva komshado osemthethweni nokuthi ungayigcina kanjani umshado kuyoba yinto enengqondo kuwe! Phela, kungakhathaliseki ukuthi ubuza imibuzo emingaki, impendulo izoba yinye - uthando futhi uthandeke! Uma uthanda owakhethiweyo, ngeke ukwazi ukulimaza lo muntu ngakho-ke uzama ukwakha ubudlelwane bakho, ukulalela umbono womlingani wakho, futhi lokhu kubaluleke kakhulu emndenini. Ukuzama kuphela ukuqonda omunye nomunye ungaya ekwenzeni ukulingana.
Uthando lunemithetho yalo kanye nemithetho yalo! Futhi ujezisa ngesihluku izimpumputhe, ngakho ungakhohlwa ukuthi impilo ayiyona isimiso esonakalisa imizwa, kodwa kuphela indlela yokwazi nomunye nomunye ezweni lomuntu othandekayo, usuqede kuwo futhi ube yizinhlayiya zalo !!!