Empeleni, umuntu ngamunye esimweni sakhe uthanda ngendlela yakhe, ngothando lwakhe. Kulokhu kulandela ukuthi uthando lomuntu ngamunye oyedwa luhlukile, ngoba bahlanganisa izinhlobo ezimbili zothando, ukudala "ama-subspecies" akhethekile. Noma kunjalo, kungenzeka ukukhomba izici eziyinhloko zezici zothando, kanye nezinhlobo eziningi ezijwayelekile zokubonakaliswa kwalo mzwa.
Uthando luboniswa kanjani?
Uthando ngobulili obuhlukile lubonakala njengezinguquko zangaphakathi emzimbeni womuntu onothando, nangokubonakaliswa kwangaphandle ngendlela yokunakekelwa okukhudlwana, ukulalela umlingani. Njengomthetho, zonke izibonakaliso zothando zihlukaniswe ngamaqembu amakhulu amathathu:
- Ukubonakaliswa kwangaphandle kwemibono yothando - leli qembu libandakanya ukubonakaliswa komlomo ngezwi lokuthandana nezifiso, izinhlobonhlobo zokudumisa, ukuveza imizwa ehlukene ("okungahle kwenzeke", amazwi ngothando), inkambo yokuxoxisana ngezihloko ezijwayelekile ezithakazelisayo.
- Iqembu lezinkulumo ezithandwayo zothando zibonakaliswa zothando ngesimo sezenzo ezithile futhi zihlanganisa izipho zomuntu othandekayo, ukuxhumana ngokomzimba (ukumbumbana, ukumanga, ukumomotheka, ubuhlobo obuseduze, njll.) Njll.
- Ukubonakaliswa okuxubile kothando, okubandakanya izinhlobo ezimbili zokuqala zokubonakalisa - usizo kunoma yini, izethembiso nokugcwaliseka kwazo, ukuvakashelwa kubangane bomuntu othandekayo, ukusebenza okuhlanganyelwe kwanoma yiziphi izimo.
Ngaphezu kwalokho, uthando lubonakaliswa nezinguquko esimweni sangaphakathi somuntu. Lokhu kungenxa yezinguquko emlandweni we-hormonal emzimbeni. Ukusabela kokuqala kokuthandana nothando yizigulane eziyingozi: zikhulula emzimbeni wonke ama-hormone (i-cortisol, i-adrenaline ne-norepinephrine). Ngokufanayo, kubangele ukuqhuma kwemizwelo yokuthandana, hhayi njalo kumnandi. I-Cortisol inikeza umzimba umzimba we-rhythm of energy, i-norepinephrine "inikeza" ukuzwa kwemizwa yokuzijabulisa nokuvusa ngocansi, kodwa ukushaya kwenhliziyo okusheshayo, ukujuluka okukhulu, ukuphefumula okusheshayo nokugeleza kwegazi okusebenzayo kubangela i-adrenaline.
Njengomthetho, zonke izinguquko ezingenhla ze-endocrine zihambisana nesikhathi sothando futhi kusukela ekubukeni kwezinto zokuphila kubambe iqhaza ekushumayeleni komuntu oyinhloko - ukwandiswa kohlobo. Uma abantu befinyelela efonini eliphakeme kakhulu lokubonakaliswa kwemizwa - uthando, ukuqhuma kwamahomoni kunciphisa. Iqiniso elithakazelisayo: uthando lunemibonakaliso enhle (ukuthembeka, uthando, kanye nenhlangano yomndeni yemiphefumulo); yonke le mizwa ikhiqizwa yi "amahomoni okuthiwa nomuntu oyedwa" - i-vasopressin ne-oxytocin. Kuyaziwa ukuthi i-oxytocin ikhiqizwa ngesikhathi sokubeletha nokuncelisa, futhi i-vasopressin ikhiqizwa emadodeni ngesikhathi sokuvuswa kocansi. Siyabonga kula mahomoni, futhi kukhona umuzwa onjalo ophakeme njengothando.
Uhlamvu olungqubuzanayo
Kungani uthando lunomlingiswa onjalo ophikisanayo? Namuhla, indoda ikutshela ukuthi uyayithanda, futhi kusasa uchitha ubusuku kakade kwenye. Yebo, futhi akulula ngaso sonke isikhathi ukuqonda imizwa yakho ...
Okokuqala, zonke izigebengu ziyi-hormone efanayo. Isimiso esiyisisekelo sisebenza lapha njenge-watch. Ngakolunye uhlangothi, kunabantu, njengezilwane, abangazalwanga ngobuhlobo bomuntu oyedwa. Ukuguquka okuqhubekayo kozakwethu, ukusesha okuphakade - incazelo yabo yokuphila. Khona-ke laba bantu ngokuvamile abatholi induduzo eqotho nezocansi. Ngokuvamile bayatshelwa ngabo: "Bona ngokwabo abazi ukuthi bafunani."
Abanye ebuhlotsheni babo baqondiswa ukuhlakanipha kanye nokuzuzisana. Ixhuma kakade "amandla okucabanga," umuntu ufuna umuntu ozobe ekhululekile ngokwezimali empilweni. Lapha lapho amatshe angaphansi kwamanzi alala khona. Abantu abashadile ngokubhekwa kokuzuzisana, kaningi "baya ngakwesobunxele" futhi bazondayo abakhethiweyo.
Uma ufuna umlingani, owesifazane, nomuntu, kaningi (ngisho nangaphandle kokuqaphela lokhu) kuqondiswa izici zangaphandle. Lokhu kuyaqondakala: ukwandisa i-genus, sikhetha umlingani omuhle kakhulu wedatha yabo yomzimba, engayinika inzalo enempilo enhle. Ngokuvamile, la madoda ayithembu. KuMama Nature, kuyiqiniso elizuzisa kakhulu: indoda kufanele inike ngangokunokwenzeka inzalo ephakeme kakhulu, kodwa kumuntu wesifazane - kungukudumala okuphelele kumadoda nasempilo.
Imiphefumulo ehlobene
Iqiniso lokuphila lihle: "Zikhethele abantu abanjalo onakho futhi bazoba nokuthile okuzoxoxa ngakho, esikhathini esizayo kuzofika ngokusebenzayo."
Uma indoda nowesifazane benomjikelezo ovamile wemisebenzi, izinga elifanayo lemfundo nokuhlakanipha, khona-ke ngeke kube khona ukungalingani ekuqondeni ngokuvumelana. Ngisho kuyokwazi ukutadisha izilimi zakwamanye amazwe, ukufunda isayensi entsha nokufunda izincwadi ezifanayo.
Ubulili obulodwa ngeke bugcwale, futhi uma impilo enganele "ngomphefumulo", khona-ke ubuhlobo ngokushesha noma kamuva buzokwenza ukuphazamiseka. Noma kunjalo, kubalulekile ukulinganisa izinzuzo nezindleko bese ukhetha okuseduze nawe.
Futhi kuthiwani ngocansi?
Ngesikhathi esifanayo, ngaphandle kokuvumelana ebuhlotsheni obuseduze, ngeke kube khona ubudlelwane obuvamile. Ngaphandle kokukhangwa ngokobulili komunye nomunye, futhi ngenxa yalokho, ngaphandle kobulili obuhle obuhle ngeke kube khona ubuhlobo obuhle. Uma kukhona okungahambi kahle enhliziyweni, khona-ke, mhlawumbe, lona wesifazane uzobe ehlupheka, kodwa kungenzeka ukuthi le ndoda ayikho. Ngakho-ke, kufanelekile ukukhetha umlingani kanye nesimiso somzimba.
Ingabe kukhona ubudlelwano obuhle?
Kuvela ukuthi ubuhlobo obuphelele, kufanele kube nobulili obuhle kanye nengxoxo eqotho. Kuphela lapha kuvela nestykovochka: uma kuhle embhedeni, akuyona into enhle ekuqondeni, futhi ngokufanayo. Futhi yisiphi isizathu? Akuyona ithonya lama-hormone afanayo? Ngokuvamile, ekuqaleni, kukhona ukukhanga, ukuvelela, isifiso, ubulili, bese kuthi ubuhlobo, uma bukhona. Ngakolunye uhlangothi, lokhu akusho ukuthi ubudlelwane be-platonic esikhathini esizayo buzobe buzophumelela.
Noma kunjalo, kusekhona ubuhlobo obuhle. Uma ubudlelwane obunjalo bukhulile, ngeke baqondwe yizinto eziphikisanayo zothando, futhi amafomu okubonakaliswa kwawo azoba engabonakali kakhulu. Ngokumane nje ubuhlobo obunjalo, kusadingeka ukuhloniphana, ukuqonda, futhi, okubaluleke kakhulu, uthando!