Kungani amantombazane ehlangana namanye amadoda, futhi ashade nabanye? Yini eyenza ushintshe umbono wabo nesimo sengqondo? Kungani uthando ludlula futhi luvuka futhi?
Mhlawumbe, iqiniso liwukuthi ngezikhathi ezahlukene zokuphila kwethu, uthando luvela ngezizathu ezihlukahlukene. Sithandana nezwi, izenzo, ezinye izimfanelo zobuntu. Kodwa, ngokuhamba kwesikhathi, izintandokazi zethu ziyashintsha bese zithanda ukudlula. Amantombazane ashada emshadweni. Ngaleso sikhathi, sebevele baqala ukuqonda ukuthi kule nsizwa igobolondo, njengokugcwaliswa kwangaphakathi, ayibalulekile kakhulu. Indoda kumele ibe, okokuqala, umvikeli kanye nesinkwa. Yonke indlu idinga umuntu oqondayo, omnene futhi onamandla ongamsiza kukho konke. Okhulile intombazane iba, lapho ezama kakhulu abafana abangaba nendima kayise wengane yakhe. Akukho lutho olungavamile futhi olulahlwa kulokhu. Eqinisweni, yilokho indlela isisindo somama esisebenza ngayo. Owesifazane unesifiso sokuvikela izingane zakhe. Futhi ukuthi lokhu kwakungenzeka, kufanele kube nomuntu oqinile eduze kwakho ongathembela kuye.
Lapho esemncane amantombazane angacabangi ngakho, bakhetha abafana, bathembele kudatha yangaphandle kanye nokuhlola kwabanye. Kule nkathi yokuphila, lapho bobabili abafana namantombazane sebeqala nje indlela yabo yokuba njengomuntu, basuke bencike emphakathini. Abantu abaningi balalela umbono wabangane nabantu ababajwayele ngaphezu kwenhliziyo yabo. Yingakho, kaningi, ukhetha okuhle, hhayi okuhlakaniphile, okweqisayo, hhayi onomusa, okwedlulele, ongathembeki. Intombazane ithola isithombe esihle, ongase uzithokoze kwabanye, kodwa, kaningi, ngaphakathi kungumdum. Abantu abasha abanjalo abakwazi ngokuphelele ukuthatha izinqumo ezithintekayo futhi banesibopho samagama abo. Uma konke kuhle, bahlale bekhona futhi behleka ngothando ngothando nangothando. Kodwa kungukuthi into ebalulekile ingakwenzeka - le nsizwa ishabalaka kakhulu. Ngakho-ke kuvela ukuthi cishe wonke amantombazane abathanda abantu ababi. Kodwa kuphela lapho beqala ukuqonda ukuthi kumuntu omubi ngempela akukho musa nomusa. Yiqiniso, kukhona labo abagqoka imaski yekhono elibi, ngokuba, empeleni, bahle kahle. Kodwa i-snap enjalo ingenzeka ngokushesha futhi kalula. Kodwa uma indoda ihlale iziphatha njenge-pod yokugcina, ungalindeli ukuthi intombi yakhe izoyibheka indlovukazi. Kodwa, ngeshwa, abesifazane baqala ukuqonda lokhu ngesikhathi esisodwa. Abanye kufanele bachithe iminyaka bese bephulukisa amanxeba abo ngaphambi kokuba benze iziphetho futhi bayeke ukukholelwa ekuthandweni komshado kusukela emgwaqeni omkhulu. Lesi esinye isizathu sokuba amadoda, ngokuvamile, ahluke ngokuphelele kulabo abasha abathandana nabo abasencane.
Ukuphila kushintsha imibono yethu futhi kufundisa okuthile okusha, kusenze sicabange ngezenzo zethu futhi sishintshe imibono yethu. Ekuphileni kwabesifazane kunamadoda amaningana abathonya izinqumo nezinqumo zabo. Kodwa hhayi wonke wabo eba umyeni. Kungani kunjalo njalo? Mhlawumbe iphuzu lonke ukuthi akubona bonke abantu abanikezwa abesifazane ukuba babe abangane bokuphila. Abanye abantu babonakala ngathi ukuze bathole ulwazi oluthile futhi bafunde emaphutheni ethu. Kwenzeka ukuthi abantu bangabani nje kuphela okuhle, kodwa futhi bangabi nhlobo. Singabathukuthela, sithukuthele, kepha ngokuhamba kwesikhathi siqala ukuqonda ukuthi bashintshe impilo yethu ukuze ibe ngcono. Ngisho nokubi kungabangela imiphumela emihle. Ngisho nothando olungathandeki lungaba yinto esemqoka yomshado oqinile.
Uma intombazane isithandana okokuqala, kubonakala sengathi lokhu kungenxa yokuphila futhi akukho lutho olungashintsha. Kodwa, uthando lokuqala, ngokuyisisekelo, lwenzeka, lapho lona wesifazane engakapheli usuku lokuzalwa lwamashumi amabili. Futhi ngalesi sikhathi ukuthi izinguquko zamakhadikhasi kumbono womhlaba kanye nesimo sengqondo ekuphileni kuqala. Siqala ukukhula ngempela, akubonakali nje sihlakaniphile futhi sizibonela thina, kepha sikhule ngempela.
Esikhathini sokukhula kwalokhu, abantu abaningi banamehlo empilweni, abantu, imvelo nomuntu othandekayo. Amantombazane ayeke ukuqonda yonke into ngokuthembela nangenxanxathela, ayeke ukucabanga abantu abaseduze kwabo. Yilapho ukuqonda kufika ukuthi umfana omuhle akafani nakanjani, futhi uthando akulona umuzwa onjalo wangunaphakade. Yiqiniso, akudingekile ukuthola ukuthi umfana uyisiphukuphuku futhi uyisiwula. Mhlawumbe kuzocaca ukuthi akukho okuncane kakhulu phakathi kwakho. Lapho sisakhula, siyaziqhenya ngokweqile, ngakho-ke zama ukucabanga ngesimo sangempela sezinto. Siziphendulela thina kanye nale nsizwa, sigqoke uthando. Lapho intombazane ikhula, uqala ukucabangela konke okwenzekile ngaphambili futhi aqaphele okuningi kwalokho ayeke walahlelwa ngaphambili. Zonke lezi zinguquko yisona sizathu esiyinhloko ukuthi abaningi badumala uthando lwabo lokuqala futhi bashintsha izintandokazi zabo. Ungabona ukuthi owesifazane wesifazane omncani, lapho ekhishwa kakhulu kubantu abangewona abajwayelekile, abahlukumezayo abavame ukushaqeka wonke umuntu futhi bayamangalisa kakhulu.
Kodwa esikhathini esingazi kahle, amantombazane asevele eqala ukuqonda ukuthi awukwazi ukwakha ubudlelwane obudabukisayo. Yingakho bakhetha amantombazane ahlukaniswe ukuqina kwabo, ukuhlakanipha nokuziphatha okuhle. Mhlawumbe lokhu kungesizathu esiyinhloko ukuthi amantombazane ahlangane namanye amadoda, futhi ashade nabanye.