Ngakho-ke, kungani amantombazane engalahlekelwa isithakazelo kumadoda? Ngisho nalapho intombazane ithola othandekayo wakhe embhedeni nomunye wesifazane, uthando lwakhe alukwazi ukuphela ngokushesha. Lokhu kudinga isikhathi esithile.
Uma umuntu esolwa ukuthi kukhona okungalungile ebuhlotsheni babo nentombazane, kufanelekile ukucabanga ngakho. Ngemuva kwakho konke, u-intuitively uzizwa ukwehla kwenkomba yayo yenzalo. Ingabe udinga ukuzama ukuqonda ngalesi simo ukuthi ukwesaba kwakho kuhlobene na? Phela, hhayi endaweni efanayo, ngokungazelelwe ube nemibono yokuthi intombazane yakho ilahlekelwe yithakazelo kuwe.
Eqinisweni, indoda iqala ukukhathazeka lapho owesifazane eziphatha njengento engavamile. Yiqiniso, indoda ingaziqinisekisa ukuthi akukho lutho olwenzekayo, kodwa ngezinga elibucayi, uzizwa ukuthi ubuthakathaka bokuzizwa kwemizwa yentombazane. Ngokufanayo, ukuziphatha okungahambisani nentombazane kukhuluma ngomlando wakhe wokuwa nesithakazelo kumuntu.
Amantombazane alahlekelwa isithakazelo kumadoda, angayeka ukuzwakalisa ngokuzumayo, noma ngokuzumayo la mantombazane ayeke ukuphendula amahlaya akho amahle. Ngokungazelelwe intombazane enjalo iyeka ukuphikisana nemihlangano yakho nabangane abadala. Kodwa maduze nje wayekuhawukela kubangani bakho. Khona-ke inzalo yakhe yesithakazelo yayisezingeni eliphakeme. Cabanga ngakho, ngoba intombi yakho ilahlekelwe yithakazelo kuwe mayelana no-75%.
Khona-ke kukhona izinguquko ezinjalo. Le ntombazanyana iphelile ukuqala ukuthinta umuntu, nakuba ngaphambili kwakungekho. Ngaphambilini, wakuthatha ngesandla ngobumnene, ewela umgwaqo, futhi manje uqobo lwakhe uqobo, futhi uyakunxusa. Yebo, udinga ukukhathazeka, ngoba inzalo kuwe iwile ku-55%.
Esikhathini esilandelayo, lapho iphesenti liwela ku-50%, le ntombazana ikuphikisa futhi uhlale ungavumelani. Intombazane yakho ngokuzumayo iqala ukukhafulela ngamazwi okukhathazeka, izingxabano ziba njalo.
Futhi ekugcineni iphuzu lokungabuyeli liyi-drop in interest in level 45%. Lapha intombi yakho isiseduze nawe, kodwa ubuhlobo bakho buvele buvele bukhona esikhathini esidlule. Le ntombazane ingxabana kaningi kuwe, ngaphezu kwalokhu, ukhumbula isikhala sakhe, ohlala kuso futhi ukhawule. Le ntombazane izama ukukuchazela ukuthi ayisafuni ukukubona, kodwa wena, njengendoda, uzithembele kuwe, ucabange ukuthi lawa ngamazwi nje. Kulokhu, amadoda acabanga ukuthi konke kuzodala futhi kuzoba, njengangaphambili. Kodwa empeleni uyagwetshwa ukufa. Esigabeni sokugcina sokulahlekelwa inzalo kumuntu, intombazane ingase ingaboni ngisho nokuthi iphonsa indoda yakhe. Kodwa ngaleso sikhathi wayeqoqe inzondo nokukhathazeka okuningi kangangokuba esikhathini esizayo wayengenaso ngisho nomcabango wokubuyisela le ndoda. Lesi simo singahlala izinyanga ezimbalwa, mhlawumbe ngisho neminyaka, kodwa ekugcineni, ukuhlukaniswa kusenakugwemeka.
Futhi ekugcineni kufika isigaba sokugcina - isigaba sokuphuka. Umusho uzokwenziwa. Intshisekelo yentombazane yakho kuwe iwela ku-30%. Lona ukuphela. Usu "uxoshiwe" isikhathi eside, kodwa okwamanje intombazane yakho ayifuni ukukubona eceleni kwayo. Intombazane yakho iqala ukungqubuzana okukhulu, ngenxa yokuthi intombazane yakho ikushiya, ilahlekelwa inzalo kuwe kuze kube phakade.
Ngokuvamile, amantombazane alahlekelwa isithakazelo kumadoda lapho ewachazela ngothando, futhi ngokuphambene, uma elahlekelwa isithakazelo, khona-ke amadoda angenandaba. Iqiniso liwukuthi lapho indoda ibonisa isithakazelo entombazaneni, ngokuhamba kwesikhathi imizwa inganciphisa, futhi lapho umuntu engazelelwe ngokuyeka ukuthanda intombazane, ngokuphambene nalokho intombazane izama ukubuyisa le ndoda nganoma iyiphi indlela. Akusize ngento enjalo inkulumo enamaphiko: "Ngaphansi kowesifazane omthandayo, siyamthanda kakhulu." Intombazane ingumzingeli kuqala. Futhi uyajabula uma indoda ilahlekelwa inzalo kuye. Udinga ukuqinisekiswa okuqhubekayo kokungaqiniseki kwakhe, futhi ufuna ukwazi ukuthi uyathanda wonke umuntu ngaphandle kokuhlukile. Ngakho, ngokushesha nje lapho umuntu elahlekelwa inzalo intombazane, uyamthola. Ukunganaki kwakho kwenza intombazane engakwazi ukuzama ukukubuyisela emuva. Uma uzigcina ubude emkhakheni wokuxhumana nentombazane, uzohlala eseduze nawe.
Ngezinye izikhathi amantombazane alahlekelwa isithakazelo kumadoda uma eqonda ukuthi lokhu akusilo uthando, ukuthi umuntu akayena umuntu ofuna ukumbona ngokulandelayo. Akumangalisi ukuthi umuntu uthi "uthando" ngisho nangaphambi kokuba athambekele othandweni, futhi owesifazane uthi leli gama ngemuva kokuthandana.
Owesifazane ebuhlotsheni nomuntu kufanele afunde kancane kancane, ukuqonda zonke izintelezi zobuhlobo bakho. Ukuze umjabulise wakhe, udinga ukufakazela ukuthi nguwe kuphela owake walinda impilo yakhe yonke. Yenza izipho, zimthole, zama ukuba umngane wakhe wangempela futhi uhlanganyele kuzo zonke izinkinga zakhe. Myeke azi ukuthi ngaphandle kwakho ngeke nje aphile. Ungumuntu ozomnika injabulo yothando, injabulo, ububele nokufudumala.
Ngokuvamile, amantombazane alahlekelwa isithakazelo emadodeni ngesikhathi abadumala kuso. Bacabanga, beka umuntu wabo okungcono kakhulu, okwenyama kakhulu, futhi ngenxa yalokho kuvela ukuthi umuntu angathengisa noma aphuthe.
Uma umuntu edumaza intombazane, khona-ke ingase ingabi nentshisekelo kubo bonke abantu ngokujwayelekile. Amantombazane anqabile ukukholelwa wonke amadoda, alahlekelwa isithakazelo kubantu futhi agxile emsebenzini nasemthandweni wabathandekayo bawo. Bazama ukwenza ngaphandle kwamadoda, ungazivumeli bona.
Yeka isithakazelo emadodeni wentombazane, okwathi okungenani kanye ekuphileni kwabo badumazekile futhi bafunda ukuthi ukukhohliswa engxenyeni yamadoda. Ngakho-ke, nina madoda kufanele niqaphele kangcono ngabathandekayo benu, ningaziphakamisi isimo. Uma ngokungazelelwe uwele othandweni, ungafihli futhi ulifihle, kungcono ukusho yonke into ngokushesha. Ngokwenza kanjalo, zama ukuletha intombazane encane njengentombazane encane. Phela, ungashiya okuhle, ngisho nangemva kokuhlala nje abangane. Yenza iqembu lokuhlehlisa bese uchazela othandekayo wakho ukuthi awukwazi ukuqhubeka uhlala ndawonye, ngoba imizwa yakho ikhulile. Emva kwakho konke, intombazane yakho, enganandaba nawe, ingenza ube buhlungu kakhulu.